# items

item_name: decorative pen holder
weight: about a pound
description:
This exquisite piece of hand craftsmanship would delicately grace the desk of any true artist.  Two fine silver pen rests carved with delicate rose vines rise from the lustrously polished dark lorken base, lending an air of elegance to this delightful piece.

appraise_text:
The decorative pen holder is about six inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of wood and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, or two items.


item_name: finely crafted fireplace
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This fireplace is surrounded by an ornately carved mahogany framework and has a beautifully finished brass hearth.  The hearth is blackened with ashes and old embers.  There is nothing on the finely crafted fireplace.

appraise_text:
The finely crafted fireplace is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: Auriental painting of an army
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a drawing of an army, marching uphill along a narrow mountain pass.  Although it is not coloured, it is very detailed, and in a way it manages to capture the essence of the depicted scene.  It is done in the unmistakable Auriental style, on rice paper.  It would nicely fit in a house decorated in an Auriental theme, or just as well in an art collector's home.

appraise_text:
The Auriental painting of an army is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: rough [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of rough [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of rough [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: satin leaf wall fan
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is an antique fan, probably constructed some time in the early Century of the Fruitbat.  Covered with a thin layer of satin leaf, there is a painting of a maiden collecting flowers on a woodland path with delicate branches and foliage in the background.  The ribs of the fan are made of long sticks of mother of pearl which converge at the handle.

appraise_text:
The satin leaf wall fan is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: morporkian tourist guide
weight: about a pound
description:
This shiny new tourist guide has been written in Morporkian to allow foreigners to get to know the city.  But since only the noble Agatean language is allowed within the Agatean Empire, you might want to keep it out of sight of guards.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed morporkian tourist guide is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: jewel encrusted bangle
appraise_text: It is made of silver and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 5/9 lb
description:
This is a pretty, light green bangle that looks extremely stylish and filled with artificial glamour.  Around the edges it has a line of dull, grey jewels that would make any passing wizard drool with desire.


item_name: birthday cake
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a rich fruit cake, filled with jam and cream and then covered with layers of almond and white sugar icing.  The words Happy Birthday have been piped onto the top in red icing.


item_name: small scarab chest with gold decor
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a small piece of furniture that can be used to store a variety of items or simply for decoration.  The lid boasts a large amount of gold leafed decor complimenting the patterns engraved in the ancient sandalwood.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The small scarab chest with gold decor is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 35 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: Agatean garden teahouse chime
weight: about a pound
description:
Finished in a stunning blue patina which accentuates the detailing, an exquisite Agatean garden teahouse sits peacefully above a large detailed furin bell.  The front door of the teahouse opens slightly so a tealight may be placed inside to cast a soft glow through the circular latticed windows.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The Agatean garden teahouse chime is about a foot and a half long and about six inches wide.  It is made of silver and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: basic furniture lock package
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a small, brown paper bag, just the type to hold sweets, peanuts, or any other similar object.  The paper bag is completely full with a basic furniture lock and a small furniture key.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The paper bag is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: some Fish Fingers
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is the classic meal of fish fingers.  As fish don't really have fingers, the name of this meal is somewhat curious.  Closer inspection reveals that the "fingers" are actually rolls of fish fins filled with rice.  To one side is a bowl filled with green sauce to dip the fingers into.


item_name: wrought iron chandelier
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This simple chandelier has been crafted from black wrought iron and made to resemble a crown.  It is comprised of a central ring, around which are eight fastened brackets.  Each has a small plate, or bobeche, affixed to hold candles and catch melted wax.  Three chains extend upward from the rim of the crown to a central hook, allowing the chandelier to be hung or suspended.  There is nothing on the wrought iron chandelier.

appraise_text:
The wrought iron chandelier is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of iron and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 4 pounds, or eight items.


item_name: [colour] leopard cat
appraise_text: You appraise the blue leopard cat and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
At first glance, this creature looks almost like a small spotted wildcat or ocelot, covered in hundreds of round bluish spots, on a ground of soft blue-grey fur.  He is a large, solid cat of athletic appearance, with a friendly and inquisitive expression.  His short, tight coat has a satin sheen that shows off muscles and spots to their best advantage.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.


item_name: silver ring
appraise_text: It is made of silver and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 6 g
description:
This is a very nice ring that has been lovingly crafted from silver.  It's engraved with leaf-patterns running around the outside.


item_name: small blue dictionary
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small, compact dictionary designed to aid the Agatean speaking person in their Djelian studies.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed small blue dictionary is about four inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: garden tidy
weight: about a pound
description:
This practical and useful garden tidy is made from several horizontal slats of light wood dovetailed to form a squat square structure.  Featureless, so as not to draw attention away from the garden itself, it tries its best not to be noticed.  All things considered, it does not do a bad job.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The garden tidy is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or thirteen items.


item_name: portrait of Duke Tacticus
weight: about five pounds
description:
The tall, imposing figure of Duke Tacticus is a popular subject for Genuan artists.  As city leaders go, he was the one who cemented a large part of the city's culture and ensured that the art of war was practised to its fullest by the city-state.  This portrait shows the man himself in full military dress, the platemail glinting in the morning sun's rays.  He stands with his right hand on the pommel of an impressive long-sword sheathed in its scabbard by his side.  The visor of his helm is up, and he stares purposefully into the distance.

appraise_text:
The portrait of Duke Tacticus is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: heavy camera
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a heavy black box with a window on one side.  Looking through the window, you notice a tiny demon sitting patiently next to a minuscule painter's easel.  You might be able to use it to take a picture.

appraise_text:
The heavy black cube is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of klatchian steel, glass and leather and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: carved cottonwood armoire
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is an odd looking armoire.  It is tall and thin, about half the width of your average armoire.  The bottom half looks delicate and pretty as the wood has been carved into genteel patterns, whilst the top half is the container space.  Two petite doors allow access to this interior.  It is made from cottonwood and the colour makes it a magnificent summer piece.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The carved cottonwood armoire is about five feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 44 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: shot glass of Ankhian port
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nicely made shot glass, of the sort usually used to serve spirit measures in pubs and restaurants.  The shot glass of Ankhian port is about half full with three teaspoons of Ankhian port.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The shot glass of Ankhian port is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: simple wooden sidetable
weight: about fifty pounds
description:
This is a simple wooden sidetable, assembled from various bits and pieces of wood.  It's not the most elegant of designs, but it's cheap and serviceable.  There is nothing on the simple wooden sidetable.

appraise_text:
The simple wooden sidetable is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: truckle bed
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This bed is basically a narrow, oak box that rests directly on the floor.  It is not quite a dog basket, but the idea is similar.

appraise_text:
The truckle bed is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: potted silk fern
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This small silk fern has delicate feathery fronds of the deepest forest green, bleached slightly along the length of their centres to give a pleasantly real look to their dyeing pattern.  The fronds cascade down over a brown wicker pot that hides the cloth-covered metal sticks that hold the fronds in place.

appraise_text:
The potted silk fern is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [adjective] skye terrier
appraise_text: You appraise the [adjective] skye terrier and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a bright little terrier with rough [adjective] fur that stands out around his face like a very messy firework.  Bright black eyes twinkle curiously behind a shaggy fringe, and his short legs and silly little half-tail are always busy.  Nobody knows quite how it got its curious name, but some suspect a tribute to an obscure but temperamental deity.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.  His fur is happily disordered.


item_name: blob of honey [build-a-bear]
appraise_text: Some honey is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of wood.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a replica of a blob of honey.  It has been crafted using wood and some excellent paintwork.  It doesn't look delicious and it has a small strap on it.


item_name: Palace Guards coat of arms stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  The Palace Guards coat of arms.

appraise_text:
The Palace Guards coat of arms stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: packet of dried thyme
description:
This is a small packet, rather like an envelope, of thick paper that has been waxed to make it more resilient.


item_name: set of lost cities cards
weight: about a pound
description:
A small piece of card with pretty pictures that lies between the two players.  A stack of brightly coloured expedition cards sit on the draw pile, just waiting for you to play.

appraise_text:
The set of lost cities cards is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: krullian battle axe
weight: 3 3/9 lb
description:
The head of this axe is made from steel.  The razor-sharp blade tilts forwards so that the point of the blade will strike an opponent when the axe is thrown.  The dull sides of the blade have been engraved with a beautiful scenery resembling the roaring seas.  The axe shaft is made from birch wood and the hilt has been wrapped with soft, black leather.

appraise_text:
The krullian battle axe is about a foot and a half long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type axe.


item_name: block of rose incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small stack of rose scented holy incense, about one block.  It can be burnt to purify the area in preparation for a religious ritual.

appraise_text:
One block of rose incense is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: simple rosewood desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This desk is little more than a heavy table with straight, unadorned wooden legs and a solid rosewood top.  Beyond the little circle recessed into one corner to hold an inkwell, it could just as well be a small kitchen table as a writing desk.  There is nothing on the simple rosewood desk.

appraise_text:
The simple rosewood desk is about five feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: bottle of scumble
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large black glass bottle.  You've heard about scumble.  The stories concerning its brewing techniques are legendary.  The ones about the rats are untrue, as are the ones with the snake heads, or indeed the lead shot.  The rumour about the dead sheep is also a fabrication.  The theory about the disastrous effects of adding it to metal are true, as is the rumour about the drowned soldier.  The large black bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of scumble.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large black bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: large pipette
weight: about half a pound
description:
From the looks of it, this piece of glassware was meant to be a long straw, the bulge in the middle suggesting that the glassblower coughed at a bad time.  In fact, it is used by alchemists both to measure and separate liquids from other liquids and is operated by a sophisticated mechinism: a mouth applied to the top opening engaged in some cautious sucking.

appraise_text:
The large pipette is about a foot and a half long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, six items, or about 2 shots.


item_name: nice red cherry
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nice red cherry, inviting as a young lady's lips.  That is, if you find that kind of thing attractive.


item_name: transparent green perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny bottle of scent.  It has a tiny label on it with a picture of a male deer.  You could probably spray it on and find yourself gorgeous to the casual observer.

appraise_text:
The transparent green perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: antique [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of antique [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of antique [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: block of patchouli incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small stack of patchouli scented holy incense, about one block.  It can be burnt to purify the area in preparation for a religious ritual.

appraise_text:
One block of patchouli incense is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: apple-wood wardrobe
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Carved from soft, untreated apple wood, this small wardrobe still gives off the faint sweet scent of its fruit.  It is carved along simple, uncomplicated lines, nothing fancy, but very home-like and peaceful.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The apple-wood wardrobe is about six feet long and about five and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 50 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: Agatean pine chest of drawers
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
A simple chest of drawers formed of genuine Agatean pine, sturdy and functional.  The grain of the wood is a little mismatched testifying to the desire of the manufacturer to create something functional rather than beautiful.  Five drawers are set into the front each bearing two knobs of the same material. Very slight ornamentation has been added in the form of gentle curves delineating the edges and unornamented top.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The Agatean pine chest of drawers is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 44 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: large opaque mandarin bottle
description: This is a large opaque mandarin glass bottle. It is open.
weight: about a pound and a half
appraise_text:
The large opaque mandarin bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: some grain
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of grain, about one handful.  Nice and golden, the type of feed given to most livestock.


item_name: bag of medium cloves of garlic
description:
This is a little brown paper bag which is designed to hold a number of small items.  It has a colourful picture of a big pile of cloves of garlic.


item_name: overstuffed [colour] armchair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Practically made for easing the burdens of a long day, this relaxing chair has luxurious overstuffed cushions that embrace and conform to the body.  Sweeping arms curve up from the base, and graceful elongated sides frame the slightly sloped back.  Four elegant legs carved with ornate scrollwork curve in a slight arch, ending in sturdy, yet decorative feet.  It is upholstered with a soft, supple-looking [colour] leather the colour of [colourful description].

appraise_text:
The overstuffed [colour] leather armchair is about seven and a half feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and leather and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: crystal ladle
description:
Light passing through this crystal ladle creates glittering and sparkling sprays of light all around.

appraise_text:
The crystal ladle is about a foot and a half long and about an inch wide.  It is made of crystal and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: season standing pass
description: This is a small white card with gilt edging. It appears to be good for another ten performances.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The small gilt card is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: Oral Satisfaction
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a nicely made cocktail glass, of the sort usually used to serve exotic coloured cocktails in pubs and restaurants.  The cocktail glass of oral satisfaction is completely full with six ounces of oral satisfaction.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The cocktail glass of oral satisfaction is roughly a couple of inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eight items, or about 1 gill.


item_name: [colour] collie
appraise_text: You appraise the black collie and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
Born and bred in the sheep-ridden chalk country, these beautiful deep-furred collies come in all different colours, having in common only their physique, loyal nature and a deep-seated need to herd everything that moves.  This elegant creature has a full coat of long, slightly coarse hair, a deep coal-black in colour.  His deep brown eyes are trusting and loyal in his finely chiselled head.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.  He looks alert and chipper, the picture of health.  His fur lies in deep, soft waves.


item_name: hammer
description: This is a tool that is used to hammer stuff in.
weight: 1 1/9 lb
appraise_text:
The hammer is about nine inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of iron and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: small block of lilac incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have the aroma of lilacs.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of lilac incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: small block of oily brown incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have a pungent odour.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of oily brown incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: rickety wooden desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is an aged wooden desk, triangular, to fit into the corner of a room.  Two drawers are set into it, one on either side, and one wooden leg has gone a bit wobbly.  It has been darkened, and polished well.  There is nothing on the rickety wooden desk.

appraise_text:
The rickety wooden desk is about ten feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: stylish tapestry
weight: about a pound
description:
This stylish tapestry is perfectly suited for any home of refinement and class.  Its abstract pattern is composed of a variety of hues, all of them black, signifying the utmost in taste and style.

appraise_text:
The stylish tapestry is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: translucent white silk fan
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is an circular handcrafted fan made of taught translucent white silk with several monarch butterflies fluttering across its surface.  A long bamboo handle has been attached to the base of the fan's frame, making it perfect for a wall mounting.

appraise_text:
The translucent white silk fan is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: water buffalo parlour stove
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
There's no greater feeling than wading through a field with a flatulent buffalo by your side and a long length of string in one hand - at least if you're a peasant.  That strangely pleasant image is detailed in a nickel casting under the front door of this parlour stove.  If you watch the glow of the fire from the front opening with your feet resting on my nickel plated foot rest, you can just about hear the waterbuffalo fertilising the soil.  The hearth is blackened with ashes and old embers.  There is nothing on the water buffalo parlour stove.

appraise_text:
The water buffalo parlour stove is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: loaded one-hundred-sided die
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a die nicely carved from ivory with one-hundred sides.  This die is special because a secret widget inside of the die can be set, enabling it to land on any side the roller chooses.  The widget is currently set to one hundred.

appraise_text:
The loaded one-hundred-sided die is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: ebony-framed mirror
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
It would be a terrible insult to inhume someone while badly dressed.  Therefore, a mirror is a must in any serious Assassin's home.  This particular mirror is framed with polished ebony that has a tiny pattern of throwing knives carved into it.  It is too dark to see much in the room.

appraise_text:
The ebony-framed mirror is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Crystal Katana of Woo
special_find_note: 20e7e72902180930e8ad78ec8a1fbfbd07db39de
description:
This katana looks very impressive indeed.  A thin, curved blade apparently composed of glimmering crystal gleams dangerously, and widens as it approaches the silver hilt.  A large glittering ruby adorns the pommel.  Unfortunately, as impressive as the sword looks, the crystal blade is so delicate that it's doubtful you could chop celery with it.  It's shiny and expensive, though, and that's the main thing.  It's also not very old, but it will probably become an ancient heirloom eventually.


item_name: black pudding
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
Much favoured by vampires, the black pudding is very much like the sausage sold by Won Huge Sausage.  It would seem the difference between them is negligible, and with enough grease in it the shopkeeper presumably hoped no-one would notice.


item_name: peasant painting of a spring outing
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a colourful peasant painting, delightfully called 'Spring Outing'.  Depicting the Rainbow Bridge which connects Shoo-Li and Hong Fa from above, the multi-coloured tops of scores of parasols cover its length, extending far into the two districts.  The curved red and blue fingers of Rainbow Bridge compliment the scene, supporting the parasols and matching their shades.

appraise_text:
The peasant painting of a spring outing is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: vodka and orange
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a short glass tumbler, of the sort usually found in pubs and restaurants.  The glass tumbler of vodka and orange juice is completely full with one cup of vodka and orange juice.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The glass tumbler of vodka and orange juice is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: loaf of onion bread
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a loaf of onion bread that has been shaped like an onion, oddly enough, and baked till the crust is a nice light golden colour.


item_name: phoenix claw
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
Phoenix claws?  How can that be?  Everyone knows that the phoenix does not exist.  As you examine them more closely, you realise that they're in fact chicken feet, braised in spicy red sauce.  You could have been fooled!  It's not surprising to find that only the locals appreciate this dish... for the amusing effect it has on tourists.


item_name: pair of trainers [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pair of white trainers.  The laces have an elastic quality so they never need to be tied up.

appraise_text:
The pair of trainers is about an inch long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is white and is made of cotton and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: bottle of Ephebian sweet wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large black glass bottle.  The large black bottle is completely full with one pint of Ephebian sweet wine.  It is completely full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large black bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: open, empty briefcase
description:
This is a dark leather attache case, slim but roomy enough.  The locks are open and the lining is worn and marked by the long term presence of Artan's version of Hex, an abacus.


item_name: gingerbread girl
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This gingerbread girl is very crudely shaped and only appears to have one eye.  Her hair is made from yellow icing and she is wearing a dress (or possibly a skirt) to further clarify her gender.


item_name: prim settee
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a somewhat prim looking settee.  It is made of cherry wood and boasts a green damask skirt that provides a degree of modesty for its spindly legs.  The uncushioned arms and spoke-wheel back make for less than comfortable seating.

appraise_text:
The prim settee is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: packet of ground turmeric
weight: less than half a pound
description:
This is a small packet, rather like an envelope, of thick paper that has been waxed to make it more resilient.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The small waxed paper packet is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or six items.


item_name: House Owner's Guide
description: This is a pocket size brown book. It is closed.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The closed small brown book is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: butterfly rice paper lamp
weight: about a pound
description:
A tabletop lamp, the pewter base of this lantern extends up into an oval shade which dangles precariously around the stem of the lamp.  The shade is made of pale yellow-tinged rice paper, which has been painted with delicate strokes by a wide fan brush.  On the shade lie swarms of huge yellow and black monarch butterflies, their delicate wings nearly beating in the nonexistent wind.  There is nothing on the butterfly rice paper lamp.

appraise_text:
The butterfly rice paper lamp is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: piece of steak
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a fairly small piece of steak for the amount of money it costs.  Great effort has been put into its decoration and seasoning, so much so that it would be surprising if you can actually taste the meat in the meal.


item_name: golden dumpling
description:
Formally known as a "golden dumpling of unknown composition", it is a crispy brown pastry wrapped around hashed meat and vegetables.  A bizarre combination of spices has been used to cause it to simultaneously taste of deep-fried pork balls, spotted duck and sauteed dog's noses.


item_name: bologna
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
Long and reddish, it is made from pig's intestine and stuffed with an interesting mixture of herbs, spices and meat.  It is shaped like a sausage, but it has a deeper red colour with flecks of white.


item_name: miniature black paintbox
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a really tiny paintbox, full of tiny quantities of black paint.  Presumably only somebody very small would find this useful.

appraise_text:
The miniature black paintbox is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: antique rocking chair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is an aged oak rocking chair, of the sort you'd normally expect a white haired old granny to be sitting on.  The seat has been worn to a mellow orange by the passage of many buttocks.  The struts forming the back have been ornately turned, while the headrest features a small carved rose.

appraise_text:
The antique rocking chair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large jade coloured bottle
description: This is a large jade coloured glass bottle. It is open.
weight: about a pound and a half
appraise_text:
The large jade coloured bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: greyed timber chair
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a plain chair made out of greyed timber planks, unpolished.  It's not very decorative, but it will last for some time, and stand around in an unassuming way in the kitchen.

appraise_text:
The greyed timber chair is about five feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Agatean steel sai
weight: 2 2/9 lb
description:
Constructed by anchoring three prongs to a hilt, the blades of this sai protrude quite pointedly from its stem.  The middle blade is considerably longer than the other two and looks suitable for both stabbing and striking attacks.  The other two blades ought to make it an extremely effective weapon for parrying all but the largest of weapons.  In an inexplicable way, it looks like the sort of thing that someone named "Raphael" might wield.

appraise_text:
The Agatean steel sai is about a foot and a half long and about an inch wide.  It is made of Agatean steel and could be used as a weapon of type misc.


item_name: dried melon
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a large juicy melon.  It looks like the sort of fruit that will spend most of its time dripping off your chin as you try to eat it.  It is all dry and shrivelled up.


item_name: verdure tapestry
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an intricately woven tapestry, handwoven from dyed wool.  In the tradition of verdure tapestries, the design has a botanical theme: dark ivy leaves are overlaid with purple and white Lancrastian violets.

appraise_text:
The verdure tapestry is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: laughing Buddha statue
weight: about four pounds
description:
This enamelled golden statue of a laughing and jolly Yen Buddha.  A big goofy grin on his face, he looks so very happy because he is sitting on a big pile of coins.

appraise_text:
The laughing Buddha statue is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [size] flower stencil
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a huge piece of cardboard, cut with a hole in the shape of a flower so it can be used as a stencil when painting.

appraise_text:
The huge flower stencil is about four and a half feet long and about four and a half feet wide.  It is made of card and paper.


item_name: item of minor holy power
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small ironwood globe, about the size of a billiard ball, scribed deeply with several circles.  On the near face a runic glyph representing Gufnork has been cut into the surface and inlaid with ruby.

appraise_text:
The holy symbol is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of ironwood.


item_name: lacquered teak chest of drawers
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This medium sized teak chest is home to four finely crafted drawers which have been set within an equally beautiful frame.  The wood seems to have been artfully bonded in such a manner as to preserve the flow of the grain of the wood throughout the entire piece in addition to the lovingly applied coat of dark lacquer that adorns its faces.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The lacquered teak chest of drawers is about three feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 53 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: bronze statue of a youth
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a life-size effigy of a young boy, sitting in calm serenity on a convenient rock that makes up his pedestal.  It has an air of gentle curiosity about it, as if he is looking up from deep thought to see what you are doing.  Completely naked, the boy is well built and harmonic, the ideal Ephebian youth, the epitome of beauty.

appraise_text:
The bronze statue of a youth is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of bronze and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pyramid postcard
appraise_text: The postcard is about six inches long and about three inches wide. It is made of paper.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This picture on the postcard features the trademark of Djelibeybi - the famous pyramids.  Glistening in the sun and piercing the cloudless, blue sky, they dominate the desert, which seem to be filled with a little too flashy hue of yellow.  The monuments themselves appear to be enhanced a bit with golden colour.


item_name: pink three tier wedding cake
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about four pounds
description:
Made from a rich fruit cake covered in rose-coloured marzipan, this is a simple wedding cake made with three tiers.  Pink roses have been positioned artfully around each level, and a strip of pink icing runs around the edge of every one.  On the top stands a small model of a happy couple.


item_name: prayer book [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a replica of a prayer book.  It has been crafted using wood and some excellent paintwork.  There is a small strap on it.

appraise_text:
The prayer book is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of wood.


item_name: oak display shelf
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This small oak shelf is the type that would hang on a wall displaying plants or other bric-a-brac.  The two supports that hold the shelf to the wall are carved oak branches.  Each branch angles down so that its leaves would spread delicately across the wall below the shelf.  There is nothing on the oak display shelf.

appraise_text:
The oak display shelf is about three feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: gingerbread bat
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This gingerbread bat has three wings for no apparent reason.  Perhaps it explains the poor thing's expression though, as it looks very tired of life.  Its huge sultana eyes just beg you to eat it swiftly.


item_name: painted landscape
weight: about ten pounds
description:
An artist has clearly spent many hours sitting on a windswept hillside to produce this picture.  In the foreground a hillside slopes down through a forest to fields of cabbages.  Amongst the cabbages are farmers and the occasional carriage rattles along a road.  In the distance you can see the ancient city of Ankh-Morpork.  The detailing is fabulous and you can see a gang of people hovering outside the Drum, appearing to do very little.

appraise_text:
The painted landscape is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: imposing black leather-bound book
weight: about four pounds
description:
This heavy book is bound in cardboard as solid as wood and overlaid with resilient black leather, with a brass buckle to keep it from spilling its contents.  The binding leaves the impression that it wouldn't give in to axes, let alone rain, mice or fire.  The Academy of Artificers' staff-and-crossed-hammers seal on the front cover bears witness to its craftsmanship.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed imposing black leather-bound book is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of paper, leather, vellum and cardboard.


item_name: resinous [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of resinous [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of resinous [scent]  broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: brine pickle
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a brine pickle.  A delicious mixture of many vegetables and spices, you really should eat it now.  As you're actually defying the laws of physics by holding it, there certainly is a very strong case in favour of its immediate consumption.  Go on, you know you want to.


item_name: Queen Ptraci bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a large, luxurious bed made of black lacquered wood that is inlaid with mother-of-pearl, lapis lazuli, and amber.  Tall, slender posts rise from each corner to support a canopy made of gold silk.  This is truly a proper resting place for royalty.

appraise_text:
The Queen Ptraci bed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: fish ring
appraise_text: It is made of platinum and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 15 g
description:
This is a band of platinum with what looks like a stylised fish design on it.  A moderately-sized sapphire is set as the visible eye.


item_name: fried lobster
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a fried lobster.  This unlucky animal has been plucked from its home, and then stir fried with courgette, ginger and oyster sauce.  It has created a most delicious looking meal, but this probably isn't much consolation to it.


item_name: large polished luggage
description: This large chest is shuffling about at the back of the shop, waiting to be bought.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The large polished luggage is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: stuffed elephant
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
High in the mountains of a far flung corner of the Disc live a small herd of elephants.  A thoughtful hunter made it one elephant smaller so you could have this.  It is huge but would make an original present for a birthday, don't you think?

appraise_text:
The stuffed elephant is about six and a half feet long and about six feet wide.  It is made of recycled elephant.


item_name: green fountain firework
weight: about a pound
description:
A long, thin tube made of cardboard, it appears that you might be able to "fire" it up into the air.

appraise_text:
The green fountain firework is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: cracked [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of cracked [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of cracked [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: tiny sand minute glass
weight: less than a pound
description:
This timepiece consists of two tiny glass chambers joined with a thin neck.  It is filled with fine, yellow sand.  Controlling the flow is achieved, as usually with hourglasses, by turning it.  The upper chamber is empty.

appraise_text:
The tiny hourglass is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: medium sized salad dressing bottle
weight: about a pound
special_find_note: 1ed9614e3a58eba9b63ebce789078e0caebaea64
description:
This is a medium sized salad dressing glass bottle.  Written in neat printing: Gretchen's Ranch Dressing for all and sundry salads.  The medium sized salad dressing bottle is about one-quarter full with four ounces of ranch salad dressing.

appraise_text:
The medium sized salad dressing bottle is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 3 gills.


item_name: tetsubo
weight: 10 lb
description:
This tetsubo is a huge club which has been made entirely of steel.  The end of the weapon widens considerably and has been covered thickly with sharp metal spikes.  In the right hands, or even in the wrong hands for that matter, this weapon looks as if it could do a fair bit of damage.

appraise_text:
The tetsubo is about four and a half feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: black marble bench
weight: about fifty pounds
description:
This is a rather small bench, made of the finest black marble.  It looks nice and posh, although some people might not find the colour too cheerful.  It also looks like it could get real cold in winter.  There is nothing on the black marble bench.

appraise_text:
The black marble bench is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 3 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: bath ticket
appraise_text: The bath ticket is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of paper.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a pretty ordinary looking paper ticket.  Its magical powers lie in the fact it permits its bearer to one bathing at the Genua City public baths.


item_name: carton of glass frames
description: This is a sturdy carton of glass frames for painting on.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The carton of glass frames is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: pair of crossed daggers stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  A pair of crossed daggers.

appraise_text:
The pair of crossed daggers stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: mahogany phoenix wardrobe
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This wardrobe stands roughly seven foot tall and is carefully crafted of red mahogany wood.  Two phoenixes in flight have been carved onto each of its doors, one higher than the other.  On the other parts of the wardrobe, there are carvings depicting fiery trails left behind as the phoenixes swoop over the masterfully carved landscape of the Klatchian desert.  The gilding causes the carvings to shimmer in colours ranging from rich red to yellow, making this wardrobe a perfectly elegant, if a bit flashy, addition to any home.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The mahogany phoenix wardrobe is about seven feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of mahogany and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 77 pounds, or about one hundred items.


item_name: purple lightning firework
weight: about a pound
description:
A long, thin tube made of cardboard, it appears that you might be able to "fire" it up into the air.

appraise_text:
The purple lightning firework is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: lobster roll
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This roll consists of lobster, avocado and cucumber rolled into rice. It has to be eaten very carefully because of the tiny lobster claws that could snip right through the unwary's nostril.  It has been thoroughly dipped in some kind of special seafood sauce.


item_name: unfinished sword
weight: 3 3/9 lb
description:
This is or will be, a long sword.  It is at the moment only half finished, but it still makes a deadly weapon.  Its rough edges could certainly do some damage to someone.

appraise_text:
The unfinished sword is about five feet long and a couple of inches wide. It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type sword.


item_name: Bes Pelargic mug
weight: about a pound
description:
This handsome mug serves not only as a handy vessel for coffee, but as a reminder of the happy times you spent in Bes Pelargic.  Quality, hand-crafted pottery combines beautifully with artistic lithography to provide a fabulous item.  The mug is chipped and has Bas Pleargic scribbled on the side.

appraise_text:
The Bes Pelargic mug is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: pharaoh head meerschaum pipe
weight: about a pound
description:
Meerschaum is a creamy white mineral that comes from the sea where it floats ashore on the waves, and as it dries, becomes extremely hard and durable - or so the makers of pipes claim!  The craftsman who gave shape to this beautiful pipe aspired to create the visionary beauty of the head of a stern Djelian pharaoh.  The bowl is shaped so that the smoke comes out from the figurine's mouth, leaving the eyes to glare furiously at whoever is sitting in front of the person smoking the pipe.  It has no tobacco in it.

appraise_text:
The pharaoh head meerschaum pipe is about six inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of stone and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: shot glass of whiskey
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nicely made shot glass, of the sort usually used to serve spirit measures in pubs and restaurants.  The shot glass of whiskey is about half full with three teaspoons of whiskey.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The shot glass of whiskey is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: red perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small bottle.  It has a nozzle at the top which you could probably press to spray yourself with the odour contained.

appraise_text:
The red perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: iridescent pearl
appraise_text: The iridescent pearl is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of pearl.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This pearl glistens and sparkles in rainbow colours.  There's something slightly magical about it, but you can't quite place it.


item_name: [adjective] beagle
appraise_text: You appraise the sleek beagle and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is an endearingly floppy miniature foxhound, with bright eyes and large soft ears.  A white coat is covered with patches of black and tan, and his solid, heavy body has been allowed to run slightly to fat - being a pet and not a working dog.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.  His fur is silky and smooth.


item_name: dobachi
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This traditional Agatean brass gong looks like a metal bowl that you might find in a kitchen.  It is presented on an ornately painted ceramic stand and would make a fine feature in any home.  By using a striking stick, a clear, bright tone can be made either by tapping the bowl or by running the stick around its rim.

appraise_text:
The dobachi is about two and a half feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of brass and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: rounded pine chest
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Constructed from pine and given an elegant, rounded shape, this chest looks like it could hold a reasonable number of items.  The untreated pine of the chest looks ready for a coat of paint.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The rounded pine chest is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 27 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: portrait of Lady Lilith de Tempscire
weight: about five pounds
description:
This is a reproduction of one of the few remaining portraits of Lady Lilith de Tempscire, the cruel and unrelenting power behind the throne of Genua before the current Duchess ascended to power.  She stands with a mischievous smile on her delicate features, her right hand curled around a decorated wand that she rests in her left palm.  She stands in the middle of a pair of full-length mirrors that stand off to either side of her.  The artist of the portrait has done a rather good job of representing the reflections stretching off into infinity.

appraise_text:
The portrait of Lady Lilith de Tempscire is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Shi-Shi statue
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a fantastic statue of the legendary Shi-Shi.  With a head like a lion and a body like a lion, the Shi-Shi looks surprisingly like a lion.  Amazingly, it is not a lion, but a Shi-Shi!  This Shi-Shi statue is made of granite and depicts the legendary animal with a slightly glazed expression on its face.

appraise_text:
The Shi-Shi statue is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of granite and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: holy amulet
appraise_text: It is made of [wood] and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 2/9 lb
description:
This is a small amulet shaped from a single piece of [wood], strung on a length of [cord type], and dedicated to the glory of [God].  Worn proudly, it serves as a sign of your devotion and a focus for concentration during rituals and meditation.


item_name: blue velvet tuffet
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a squat, round chair without back or sides, rather like a large ottoman covered with cushions and quilting.  The tuffet is covered in light blue velvet, highly impractical, but pretty.

appraise_text:
The blue velvet tuffet is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Wizard's Nap Chair
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This is an extremely large, very sturdy armchair that has been designed specifically with Wizards in mind.  It is covered in butter soft elephant hide with reinforced patches on the arms and seat, just right for an impromptu nap.  The chair's feet have been cunningly carved into stumpy little legs with elephant toes, jam included for emergency snacking.

appraise_text:
The Wizard's Nap Chair is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of leather and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: moon-daisy
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small, low-growing plant with a rosette of leaves and a flower head consisting of a yellow central disc flower and pinkish-white night-blooming outer ray flowers.


item_name: snake-carven oak desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Ever heard the story of that witch with hair made of snakes, who turned everyone who looked at her into wood?  Well, this desk looks at first glance like she picked up a mirror.  It is a carved mass of oak snakes, seething over the desktop and down the legs.  Under the thick pane of glass that forms a flat top to the desk, serpentine backs coil and writhe, with the occasional dragonish head rearing up or biting at its neighbours.  It must have taken a very long time to carve.  There is nothing on the snake-carven oak desk.

appraise_text:
The snake-carven oak desk is about five feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: long mahogany bar
weight: about forty pounds
description:
A long mahogany bar perfect for storing bottles, serving alcohol on, or just hiding behind for the latest surprise party.  The front of the bar features a brass plate that is engraved with the vulture-headed figure of Hat, the God of Unexpected Guests.  There is nothing on the long mahogany bar.

appraise_text:
The long mahogany bar is about five feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 10 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: pint of pear cider
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a nicely made pint glass, of the sort usually used to serve beer and cider in pubs and restaurants.  The pint glass of pear cider is completely full with one pint of pear cider.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The pint glass of pear cider is roughly a couple of inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: Huanghuali horseshoe armchair
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a brown Huanghuali horseshoe armchair, so called after the shape of the arm and back support.  On the whole this chair is quite minimalist in design, with large spaces between the wooden supports that compose the frame.  An elegant design, it is classic and would fit in with most household decor.

appraise_text:
The Huanghuali horseshoe armchair is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: beginners embroidery book
weight: less than a pound
description:
Pictured on the front cover of this embroidery pattern book is an embroidered cat with a large ribbon tied into a bow around its neck.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed embroidery pattern book is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: statue of Tzut
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a small statue of Tzut, the Snake-Headed God of the Upper Djel.  Whilst snakes are often associated with evil, Tzut's sand boa head makes Him look adorable.  His body has been carefully sculpted to be far more muscular than usual.  The sculptor must either hold Him in high regard or be terrified of Him.

appraise_text:
The statue of Tzut is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of marble and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: panda t-bone
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a t-bone, not actually from a panda, because everyone knows that tastes terrible, but the name attracts tourists.


item_name: small block of dark yellow incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense is made of a dark yellow substance, with red and black flecks throughout.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of dark yellow incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: helping of mushrooms
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
A small collection of black mushrooms held in an edible potato container, you've seen more delicious looking dishes.


item_name: lotus flower bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a magnificent Emperor-sized bed, the headboard and footboard carved from the finest Apachia wood available.  A large wooden lotus sits in the middle of the headboard, surrounded by a delicate pattern of long leaves which reach out to the sides of the bed.  The footboard echoes a matching pattern and is complimented by the crisp white sheets and pillows that have been snugly tucked around the mattress.

appraise_text:
The lotus flower bed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: medium canopic jar
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a medium sized canopic jar with a carved stopper in the shape of the deity also known as Silur who is said to rule the world of the dead.  The jar has been designed to be used to bury the embalmed viscera that is removed from the body of the deceased during mummification.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The medium canopic jar is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of alabaster and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 3 gills.


item_name: bottle of wolf repell
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large yellow glass bottle.  The large yellow bottle is about half full with two cups of translucent yellow slime.  It is about half full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large yellow bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: old rosewood writing desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a sturdy old writing desk, made of heavy rosewood, once polished to a fine gloss but now scuffed and mellowed with time.  Four drawers are set in the front, each with a simple brass handle.  There is nothing on the old rosewood writing desk.

appraise_text:
The old rosewood writing desk is about eight and a half feet long and about four feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: golden mih futon
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
The golden bars which constitute the frame of this flat futon curve up in graceful arches which dust the sides of the bed and act as rails.  The headboard is made from arched beech wood slats which lie underneath another golden rail.  A flat black mattress, covered with a thin black textured blanket lies on the frame, looking wholly comfortable.  The futon has been folded out into a bed.

appraise_text:
The golden mih futon is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: chili and saffron cream white chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a chili and saffron cream praline.  It is filled with one layer of hot chili cream, and one layer of sweet saffron cream.  A covering of white chocolate, which is decorated with a tiny squiggle of dark chocolate, completes the creation.  It looks delicious and is probably quite expensive.


item_name: tiny mug of Klatchian coffee
description:
This is a really small ceramic mug, no bigger than a shot glass.  It is glazed black and would be ideal to hold coffee.


item_name: small cream dictionary
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small, compact dictionary designed to aid the Agatean speaking person in their Uberwaldean studies.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed small cream dictionary is about four inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: fishbowl with crackled blue enamel
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Peace and serenity, the foundation for a good life considered in Agatean philosophy, are reflected in this sixteen-inch blue and white porcelain fishbowl.  A special pottery heating technique is applied in this product.  Looking closely one can see the small crackles throughout the entire fishbowl, which is more interesting to the eye than just a plain surface.  The interior is an underwater scene of gold fish swimming in circular along the edge of the bowl.  Resting on a beautiful hand-polished cherry wood base, the shapes of several goldfish can be seen swishing back and forth beneath the water it holds.

appraise_text:
The fishbowl with crackled blue enamel is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small scarab cupboard
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This small cupboard is scratched and dented a little.  It has a brass rim around the main frame from which a single wobbly cupboard door hangs from.  On the door it has some faded scarab decoration.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The small scarab cupboard is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: plain brass music stand
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a plain brass music stand, of the sort found in any number of recording studios and music halls.  There is nothing on the plain brass music stand.

appraise_text:
The plain brass music stand is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: small marble garden god
weight: about a pound
description:
This pale grey marble effigy of the head and shoulders of an unnamed god of the vineyard and garden looks up at you from below for he is a mere five inches tall.  From his position in a flowerbed he may overlook the tranquillity and fertility of the garden and keep it safe from intruders such as blackbirds and tomcats.

appraise_text:
The small marble garden god is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of marble and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: ornate fleur-de-lys stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  An ornate fleur-de-lys.

appraise_text:
The ornate fleur-de-lys stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: Circle Sea water bed
weight: about a hundred and fifty pounds
description:
This is a large, round water bed filled with salt water that is allegedly from the Circle Sea, but is more likely the run-off from Gher Khin's Picklery.  The water mattress is enclosed in a wooden frame made of sturdy oak.

appraise_text:
The Circle Sea water bed is about three feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: colourful Claro Cliff dessert dish
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a well-made bowl, glazed in colourful shades.  It features a windmill-design, painted in a colourful, angular fashion.  A small CC monogram has been carefully signed on the reverse.  There is nothing on the colourful Claro Cliff dessert dish.

appraise_text:
The colourful Claro Cliff dessert dish is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pottery.  It can hold about 3 pounds.


item_name: get resurrected soon card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
This burlesque card shows a fellow in priest's robes greeting a misty form on the front cover.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The get resurrected soon card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: wedding ring
appraise_text: It is made of gold and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 10 g
description:
A beautiful gold band, it goes on and on forever symbolising the eternal union of two people.  Engraved on the underside is a diagram of a fish and a rabbit in an eternal embrace.


item_name: white square bathtub
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a large, square shaped bathtub, about five feet long by five feet wide, and approximately two feet tall.  It appears to be made of fine white porcelain, making it truly fit for a king, or at least some very rich family.  By the looks of it, the most comfortable way to use it would be to lie in it diagonally, and the corners are gently rounded off to fit this position nicely.  Or it could easily fit two, or even three people sitting side by side along an edge.

appraise_text:
The white square bathtub is about five feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about sixty items, or about 52 gallons.


item_name: low bamboo chair
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
Calling this thing a chair is an exaggeration par excellence.  Bamboo board would be more likely since it has been designed to match the height of the common bamboo tables for those people, who refuse to kneel at the table.

appraise_text:
The low bamboo chair is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: handful of egg noodles
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a handful of egg noodle, a peculiar yellow brand of noodle with an egg-like taste.  Maybe the chicken was ill.


item_name: Tengu's Codex
special_find_note: 3264e33d24146d28424cd71e371def288b6890c0
description:
When magic was sealed away from the peasantry of the Agatean empire, many of the masterworks of the Imperial Mages were secreted away.  The most legendary of these was the Tengu's Codex.  The Codex was given to the first mage by a strange creature called a tengu, a man-bird hybrid.  This document was the basis for all Agatean magic.  Sealed in this glass topped wooden box appear to be the scrolls that make up the Codex, a beguiling wealth that is both forbidden and immeasurable.


item_name: maze artwork
weight: about a pound
description:
An intricate maze has been constructed behind a pane of clear glass and set in a grey frame.  A devout follower of Sandelfon could spend hours lost in study of its long stretches of corridor and gazing at its dead ends.

appraise_text:
The maze artwork is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pile of cream-coloured brocade cushions
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This is an enormous cluster of soft cream brocade pillows which have been arranged on the floor for sitting, lying and lounging.

appraise_text:
The pile of cream-coloured brocade cushions is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: nougat white chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
Soft and fluffy nougat hand coated in white chocolate and lovingly moulded into a shell shape and decorated with shaved milk chocolate.


item_name: [colour] [slogan] mug
weight: about a pound
description:
As mugs go, this [colour] one would have been pretty unremarkable, but someone has painted the word [slogan] on it in big red letters.  Now it's unique.

appraise_text:
The [colour] [slogan] mug is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of pottery and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: barrel of ouzo
weight: about six hundred pounds
description:
This is a large, sturdy oak barrel, the sort used for storing wine since wine-making began.  The oak barrel is completely full with many gallons of ephebian ouzo.  It is completely full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The oak barrel is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 833 pounds, about three hundred and fifty items, or about 60 gallons.


item_name: golden ball
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a simple golden ball, suitable for bouncing.  Legend has it it contains the spirit of a trapped royal who offended a powerful witch.  Who knows if that is true, but it does look like bouncing it would be lots of fun, in a mindless sort of way.

appraise_text:
The golden ball is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: Blue Lagoon
weight: about a pound
description:
A wide cocktail glass.  The cocktail glass is almost completely full with seven ounces of runny light blue cocktail.  It is almost completely full.

appraise_text:
The cocktail glass is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eight items, or about 1 gill.


item_name: pair of black soft-soled boots [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a miniature pair of soft-soled, ankle-length black boots.  The soles are almost silent and the velvet uppers are the mandatory black.

appraise_text:
The pair of black soft-soled boots is about an inch long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is black and is made of leather and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: purple rose [healing rose]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This bloom is as large as your hand and is a deep, mystical purple.  It exudes a heavy scent that lingers as you move it about.

appraise_text:
The purple rose is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of rose and plant matter and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: grey lever
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This wooden lever is indifferently grey, holding the exact centre between black and white.  It is mounted on a thin wooden box, ready to hang on a wall.

appraise_text:
The grey lever is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: galloping horse stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  A galloping horse.

appraise_text:
The galloping horse stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: bottle of fine red Ephebian Wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large green glass bottle.  The large green bottle is about three-quarters full with some red wine.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large green bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: antique tapestry-covered armchair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This broad, comfortable armchair has a frame made from sturdy oak, smooth and dark from years of use.  The thickly padded seat and back are upholstered with a pattern of dark grey branches, winter-bare against a clouded grey sky, with a storytelling of ravens clustered thickly along the boughs.  A single large carved raven perches on the gothically arched back, head raised and wings spread as if to take flight.

appraise_text:
The antique tapestry-covered armchair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: loaf of pepper bread
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a loaf of pepper bread that has been shaped like a knot and baked till the crust is a nice golden colour.  Each slice has small flecks of pepper running through it.


item_name: Bottle of Muroka Sake
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a bottle of premium Muroka sake.  It has a square label stuck to it bearing the laughing panda logo of the Kou Ture Sake Emporium.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The Muroka bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: dwarfish axe
weight: 4 4/9 lb
description:
This finely crafted axe is made of high quality dwarfish steel.  In the hands of a dwarf, it is an intimidating weapon, often times handed down as a family heirloom.  Many a dwarf owe their lives to keeping one at their sides at all times although it can be a bit creepy when they take to sleeping with them as well.

appraise_text:
The dwarfish axe is about two and a half feet long and about six inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type axe.


item_name: unfinished orangutan [build-a-bear]
description: This is a toy orangutan, or at least it will be when it's completed.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The unfinished toy orangutan is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of fur and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: square pine table
weight: about four pounds
description:
This square table could serve as a small dining table or as a general work table in a study or kitchen.  It is made from unfinished pine that could be painted or otherwise decorated.  There is nothing on the square pine table.

appraise_text:
The square pine table is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 16 pounds, or about fifty items.


item_name: Bottle of Amazake Sake
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a bottle of premium Amazake sake.  It has a square label stuck to it bearing the laughing panda logo of the Kou Ture Sake Emporium.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The Amazake bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: bottle of blood fix
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a large clear glass bottle.  The large clear bottle of smelly brown muck is about half full with two cups of smelly brown muck.  It is about half full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large clear bottle of smelly brown muck is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: game of klondike solitaire
description: A small deck of cards and a nice table to lay everything out on.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The game of klondike solitaire is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: set of three nested lotus blossom tables
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Exhibiting its pleasing simple lines in a distinct Sung style, this exquisite set of nested tables is arranged in a three-tiered pullout fashion that allows several surfaces to be available in a small space.   Over the shiny black lacquer each table is handpainted with lotus flowers, the symbol of peace in the Agatean tradition.  The workmanship is so precise that a joinery technique has been used to fasten the tables together, so perfect that no nails were used in the tables' construction.    There is nothing on the set of three nested lotus blossom tables.

appraise_text:
The set of three nested lotus blossom tables is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: small pipette
weight: less than half a pound
description:
From the looks of it, this piece of glassware was meant to be a long straw, the bulge in the middle suggesting that the glassblower coughed at a bad time.  In fact, it is used by alchemists both to measure and separate liquids from other liquids and is operated by a sophisticated mechinism: a mouth applied to the top opening engaged in some cautious sucking.

appraise_text:
The small pipette is about nine inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, six items, or less than a shot.


item_name: bejewelled cutlass
weight: 3 3/9 lb
description:
This cutlass has a short, wide, slightly curved blade.  The hilt of the blade has bright red rubies set into it. Looking closely at it, you see that it is of perfect balance and you can tell that the blade itself is very sharp and keen.

appraise_text:
The bejewelled cutlass is about two and a half feet long and about four inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type sword.


item_name: colourful Claro Cliff dish
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a well-made dish, glazed in colourful shades.  On it is glazed a depiction of a bouquet of flowers, which despite being somewhat simplistic is still eye pleasing.  A small CC monogram has been carefully signed on the reverse.  There is nothing on the colourful Claro Cliff dish.

appraise_text:
The colourful Claro Cliff dish is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pottery.  It can hold about 3 pounds.


item_name: golden lilac arabesque daybed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a beautiful daybed, its railings made of a stunningly simple arabesque pattern, the centres of which are a lovely shade of lilac, while the outer rings fade into gold.  Often placed in the studies of Agatean gentlemen, a noble would often spend many hours reclining on his daybed whilst writing poetry or meditating.  This particular daybed is surprisingly feminine, its long lines broken up by the curves and twists of the arabesque and by the ornate legs upon which it stands.  The mattress has been set into the frame and does not break the simple lines of the bed's construction.

appraise_text:
The golden lilac arabesque daybed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pair of crossed broomsticks stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  A pair of crossed broomsticks.

appraise_text:
The pair of crossed broomsticks stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: greasy [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of greasy [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of greasy [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: painting of the battle of the witches
weight: about five pounds
description:
In this dramatic painting, a black-hatted Granny Weatherwax faces off against the voodoo lady Mrs Gogol on the stairs of the Genuan palace.  Mrs Gogol holds a flaming voodoo doll in her hands, and Granny Weatherwax's hand has been plunged completely into the flame of one of the burning torches lining the staircase.  Around the floor of the palace can be seen a number of stunned nobles of the city, shocked into silence at the display of power.

appraise_text:
The painting of the battle of the witches is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: frying pan
weight: 5 lb
description:
This is a solid-looking frying pan.  It looks like it has been used for many generations as both a cooking utensil and a handy implement for dinging people around the head with.

appraise_text:
The frying pan is about a foot and a half long and about a foot wide.  It is made of iron and could be used as a weapon of type misc.


item_name: brass trombone
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
The trombone is a fine wind instrument made out of brass.  It is similar to a large trumpet, consisting of a long tube that curves back on itself, ending in a bell.  On the end of this tube fits a slide, allowing the user to change pitches.  It has a somewhat complicated system of three ventholes which seems to regulate its pipes.

appraise_text:
The brass trombone is about two and a half feet long and about six inches wide.  It is made of brass and appears to be a musical instrument from the wind family.


item_name: rainbow net
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
A multi-hued rainbow net.  It is very colourful, you can see all the colours of the rainbow in it.  Even octarine flickers across its fibres in a netty sort of way.

appraise_text:
The rainbow net is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: simple cream wardrobe
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
A large wardrobe with its top curving up to a simple dome, the whole painted a rather pleasant cream.  It rests on four balled feet, with a single door opening in the middle to permit access to clothes.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The simple cream wardrobe is about seventeen and a half feet long and about sixteen feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 61 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: Sandelfon robe [build-a-bear]
weight: about three pounds
description:
This miniature grey robe has all the qualities for a worshipper of Sandelfon.  It has many shades of grey, although only forty nine.  It almost gives off an air of dust.

appraise_text:
The grey Sandelfonian robe is about six inches long and about four inches wide.  It is grey and is made of cotton and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: Genuine Klatchian Garlic tobacco
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small brown leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  The stitching at the seams is slightly ragged.  The brown leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of very special Klatchian tobacco.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The brown leather pouch is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of leather and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or four items.


item_name: steel kopis
weight: 2 8/9 lb
description:
The name of this sword, derived from the Ephebian word to cut or strike, hardly does justice to this simple yet effective weapon.  The single-edged blade with a distinct forward curve would be extremely proficient at performing powerful slashing attacks.  Its sharp tip would also prove invaluable for hammering home the point in the cut and thrust of philosophical debate - if things were to get out of hand, at least.

appraise_text:
The steel kopis is about two feet long and about three inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type sword.


item_name: Baby Bamboo Shoots
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a meal for those who don't particularly like or trust the meat content of Auriental food.  The plate in front of you has a number of small bowls on it and two bamboo shoots to the side that can be used as chopsticks.  In each of the bowls bamboo leaves have been prepared in a different way.  In the first they have been diced up into tiny pieces and mixed with various herbs and spices.  In another they have been ground into a green paste, and in a third they have been cut into the shape of little men.  All up this is one of the more fun meals available here.


item_name: piece of greasy bacon
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
A particularly greasy piece of bacon, it is instantly recognisable as being that sold by Won Huge Sausage, who employs the slogan "More recognisable parts of pig than Dibbler!"  Unfortunately, this only guarantees one.


item_name: flimsy door lock package
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a small, brown paper bag, just the type to hold sweets, peanuts, or any other similar object.  The paper bag is completely full with a flimsy door lock and a small brass key.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The paper bag is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: tiny brass gong
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a tiny brass gong, which hangs from an equally tiny frame.  Fluttering butterflies flit around each other on the disc, flying aimlessly across its smooth surface.  The gong can be hit to make a loud ringing sound and annoy everyone in the room.

appraise_text:
The tiny brass gong is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of brass and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: piece of crisp white tissue paper
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a lovely big piece of crisp white tissue paper.  It looks like it could be used to wrap up something as a package.  Try wrapping up your gift in it.

appraise_text:
The piece of crisp white tissue paper is about three feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 25 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: small block of lime-scented incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have the aroma of limes.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of lime-scented incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: two-handled kylix
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a two-handled Ephebian drinking cup.  The interior base is broad and shallow, featuring a saucy depiction of Tuvelpit having a lot of fun with some friends in the centre.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The two-handled kylix is about three inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, twelve items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: large timpani
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
The bowl of this drum is hemispheric in shape and is made from dented copper.  Vellum is stretched across the opening of the bowl and is secured with a hoop and a series of tension rods placed along the circumference of the drum.

appraise_text:
The large timpani is about three feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of copper and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: black backpack
weight: 4 4/9 lb
description:
This is a large, black leather backpack with a couple of hefty straps to support it on each shoulder - you could wear it on just one shoulder, although it would be awkward.  It will hold a lot of things.  The black backpack has one main pocket and two side pockets.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The black backpack is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is black and is made of leather and looks like you could wear it.  It can hold about 44 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: large bottle of Ephebian Retsina
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a pale green glass bottle onto which 'Gouldin's Wine, Ephebe.' has been embossed.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The large, green glass bottle is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: fluffy coffee table
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is your basic, traditional coffee table in style.  It is slightly rectangular in shape, with 4 block legs and some support struts.  It is, however, covered in layers and layers of fluff, just for all those Gufnork priests.  It's nice and soft...and fluffy....  Ooooohhh....  Several pairs of handcuffs hang jauntily from the legs, along with a small key dangling on a delicate chain.  There is nothing on the fluffy coffee table.

appraise_text:
The fluffy coffee table is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: white ash double bed
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a rather large double bed made of the finest white ash.  The headboard is shaped like a wide oval, extending a bit past the sides of the bed in both directions.  The legs are thick square beams, and are rounded in a ball shape at the upper end.

appraise_text:
The white ash double bed is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: oak single bed
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a small, tidy bed made of blonde oak.  Each corner of the bed has a short post with a knob, and the feet of the bed look somewhat like large, cloven pigs feet.  The mattress is thin and hard.

appraise_text:
The oak single bed is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: coffee cream milk chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a coffee cream praline.  It is filled with stong coffee cream and an odour reminiscent of Klatchian coffee.  A covering of milk chocolate, decorated with some coffee grains, completes the creation.  It looks delicious and is probably quite expensive.


item_name: painting of a fiery plum blossom branch
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a simple watercolour of a fiery plum branch, half covered in the feathery white spoils of winter.  Half the plum blossoms have been painted a brilliant orange colour, and the rest a more subdued flesh colour as snow has covered most of their seasonal beauty.   A pale sun shines behind the mahogany-coloured branch, its dulcet rays spilling out into a creamy background. 

appraise_text:
The painting of a fiery plum blossom branch is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: occult gold medallion
appraise_text: It is made of gold and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 5/9 lb
description:
This heavy gold medallion in studded with gems, forming pictures of the Moon in Her various phases.  In Her full and half aspects, you think you can detect a knowing smile.


item_name: Klein bottle
weight: 4/9 lb
special_find_note: c950a4e37be3bc124add6505e1c708dfd5a8670e
description:
This is a mind-bendingly paradoxical Klein bottle which has the revolutionary property of not being able to hold anything at all on account of having no volume.  A student discovered the ingeniously intricate shape at the back of a lecture theatre, as he was trying to make a paper giraffe out of thaumic funnel paper.  This one, however, has been skilfully blown from glass.

appraise_text:
The Klein bottle is about six inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or four items.


item_name: Stratographic Djel
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a nicely made cocktail glass, of the sort usually used to serve exotic coloured cocktails in pubs and restaurants.  The cocktail glass of stratographic djel is completely full with six ounces of stratographic djel.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The cocktail glass of stratographic djel is roughly a couple of inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eight items, or about 1 gill.


item_name: country kitchen bench
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This country kitchen bench is beautifully handcrafted from oak.  The countertop is polished granite strong enough to withstand the sharpest knife and the trim is oak, delicately carved with the craftsman's mark of intertwining oak branches.  The legs of the bench could be painted.  There is nothing on the country kitchen bench.

appraise_text:
The country kitchen bench is about six and a half feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 33 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: sweetie shaker
appraise_text: The sweetie shaker is about four inches long and about four inches wide. It is made of metal.
description:
The shaker is covered in brightly coloured pictures of Lancre with a hand scrawled title.  Strangely, the pictures on one side show people eating sweets and looking happy while on the other, they show people spitting them out.  Anyway, inside there are no doubt delicious chocolates just waiting to come out - unless some greedy pig ate them all already.


item_name: golden wall fan
weight: about four pounds
description:
Measuring almost thirty five inches in height, when open this fan expands to four and a half feet in width and makes a stunning wall display for the home.  Beautifully handpainted in Sum Dim and handcrafted in nearly translucent rice paper with mahogany stained bamboo ribs, the fan is a brilliant gold with the relaxing scene of a rising sun.

appraise_text:
The golden wall fan is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: glass-topped pine desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is an elegant L-shaped desk, made of high quality yellow pinewood and topped with a pane of glass.  Under the glass, the wood has been inlaid with little triangles of wood in different colours, radiating out in a delicate, hypnotic pattern from the centre.  There is nothing on the glass-topped pine desk.

appraise_text:
The glass-topped pine desk is about five feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: bottle of rose perfume
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a perfume bottle made out of red crystal.  It is almost full of rose perfume which can be sprayed onto someone.

appraise_text:
The red perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: Klatchian tribal feast
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
The Klatchian Tribal Feast appears to consist of lots and lots of unidentifiable things, probably scraped off the street, which have been boiled and then drenched in a variety of sauces.


item_name: red lacquer coffin
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a fine red lacquer coffin.  It is made from sturdy cedar and oak.  It has a beautiful interior of white silk lace.  This lovely coffin is just the thing to bury your dear departed sister, friend, or spouse in.  You could probably heft a corpse into this coffin.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The red lacquer coffin is about eight and a half feet long and about four and a half feet wide.  It is red and is made of oak and cedar and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 444 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: copper ring
appraise_text: It is made of copper and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 5 g
description:
This is a very nice ring that has been lovingly crafted from copper.  It's engraved with leaf-patterns running around the outside.


item_name: black shafted mace
weight: 4 4/9 lb
description:
This mace is about two feet long and is made of the finest blackened Klatchian steel.  It features some wicked-looking pyramidical spikes on its business end and a leather wrapped handle.

appraise_text:
The black shafted mace is about two feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of klatchian steel and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: bottle of Sung Lemonade
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large yellow glass bottle.  The very rare "singing lemon" has juice that is highly alcoholic.  Here's a bottle of it.  The large yellow bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of alcoholic lemonade.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large yellow bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: wearable mouse
appraise_text: You appraise the small white mouse and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about a pound
description:
The most distinguishing feature of this little mouse is the large and slightly ludicrous straw hat perched on his head.  His small, white hairy ears poke out from specially placed holes in his wide brimmed hat, which casts a shadow over his inquisitive blue eyes and long nose.  Perfect white fur covers him from head to toe, and his long whiskers and twitching nose give this little rodent an air of curiosity and bashful charm.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.


item_name: dirty old sock
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a dirty old sock.  It lurked under someone's bed for many months before being found in a house clearance when it was sold as part of a job lot to Flyn Skint.  It is unwearable and unsavoury.  You could put something in it though.

appraise_text:
The dirty old sock is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of wool and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or nine items.


item_name: advanced catch the flag box
description: A small box with a bunch of flags inside it. They appear to be in all sorts of colours.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The advanced catch the flag box is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of wood.


item_name: [size] falling snowflakes stencil
weight: less than half a pound
description:
This is a medium piece of cardboard, cut with a hole in the shape of some falling snowflakes so it can be used as a stencil when painting.

appraise_text:
The medium falling snowflakes stencil is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of card and paper.


item_name: stately mahogany sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This dark, stately sofa looks as if it should have several large, floppy hounds draped out on a rug at its foot.  It carries the weight of years, and many pounds of solid mahogany.  It is cushioned with slightly faded red and gold brocade.

appraise_text:
The stately mahogany sofa is about seventeen and a half feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small terracotta satyr
weight: about four pounds
description:
This miniature terracotta satyr, about the size of an infant, sits on his haunches, looking up at you while playing his aulos with a look of firm concentration.  His tiny little horns, poking out between his curls, and his hairy haunches give him a rather charming look, rather like a crossbreed between a human baby and a stray goat.

appraise_text:
The small terracotta satyr is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of clay and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: ram skull
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a particularly occult looking ram's skull.  It doesn't appear that the animal has needed it for a long time.

appraise_text:
The ram skull is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: wicker chair
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
Someone with a true fondness for wood has fashioned this small chair.  Its sturdy frame supports a seat and back of strongly woven wicker-work, and legs and struts are wound about with fine strips of the same.  A few abstract patterns have been worked into the material, making for an attractive and functional seat.

appraise_text:
The wicker chair is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of cane and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small metal shield
weight: 3 8/9 lb
description:
This is a small, round shield of metal.  It is very tough, and weighs a fair bit.  On the other hand, it will do a much better job than a wooden shield.

appraise_text:
The small metal shield is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of steel and looks like it could be held as a shield.


item_name: great scimitar
weight: 5 5/9 lb
description:
A bigger and more damaging cousin of the scimitar.  It is heavier and requires much strength to wield.  It has a miniature flying camel at the base of the handle.

appraise_text:
The great scimitar is about six feet long and about four inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type heavy-sword.


item_name: polished walnut desk
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
An imposing walnut desk that would add a touch of class to any study.  The polished wood displays hues of dark brown which are nicely offset by a thin bronze border.  There is nothing on the polished walnut desk.

appraise_text:
The polished walnut desk is about four feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: black perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small bottle.  It has a nozzle at the top which you could probably press to spray yourself with the odour contained.

appraise_text:
The black perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: roll of lavatory paper
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a roll of pink, perfumed lavatory paper. It looks very soft, and there must be several uses for it.

appraise_text:
The roll of lavatory paper is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: Morpork Favourite Tobacco
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small brown leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  The stitching at the seams is slightly ragged.  The brown leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of Morpork favourite tobacco.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The brown leather pouch is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of leather and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or four items.


item_name: some cloves
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a a small pile of thin brown cloves, about one bud.  A tall, broad tree with low-hanging branches.  It has aromatic, flavourful flower buds.


item_name: iced cupcake
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small cupcake looks like a blob of bright colour, its thick shell of icing seeming like a rainbow of shape and hue - whoever made this mouthful of joy has made sure it looks as good as it tastes.


item_name: small block of musk-scented incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have the aroma of musk.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of musk-scented incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: oiled pine single bed
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a rather large bed, as large as a single bed can possibly be while still counting as a single bed.  It is around seven foot long by a whole three foot wide, and has a one foot thick mattress.  The sides and the curved headboard are made of solid Hublandish pine planks, and the bedposts are five inch thick beams.  Every piece of wood is oiled to bring out the glow and striped texture.

appraise_text:
The oiled pine single bed is about seven feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: two-tailed coin
appraise_text: The shiny brass coin is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of brass.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a coin made from what looks like brass.  However, unlike normal coins it is worthless, as it shows a ceremonial Ankh on both the reverse and obverse.


item_name: cast iron parlour stove
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This cast iron parlour stove is an impressive stove with exquisitely detailed castings and platings.  Flowing intricate detailing and cast work are the hallmarks of this stove and make it a truly artistic masterpiece.  Set back on four sturdy yet delicate-looking feet, this flower-print parlour stove is sure to become the distinguished centrepiece in almost any home.  There is nothing on the cast iron parlour stove.

appraise_text:
The cast iron parlour stove is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: small block of dark red incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have a pungent odour.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of dark red incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: bottle of Djeric's Melon Liqueur
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large green glass bottle.  This is a bottle of Djeric's Melon Liqueur, a local speciality.  The large green bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of melon liqueur.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large green bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: fried egg
description:
This egg looks typical of all roadside cafes.  The yolk has been cooked until it is hard and flaky while the white is a mixture of transparent goo and white stringy bits.


item_name: wrought iron mirror
weight: about seven pounds
description:
This is a full length mirror with a wrought iron frame that can either be hung on the wall or stood up on little iron legs.  The frame curls in swoops and whiplash curves around the mirror, giving it a light and graceful feel.  It makes looking in the mirror a less worrying experience.  It was definitely crafted by a master.  It is too dark to see much in the room.

appraise_text:
The wrought iron mirror is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large [colour] bottle
description: This is a large chocolate brown glass bottle. It is open.
weight: about two pounds
appraise_text:
The large chocolate brown bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: painting of a flock of ducks in a lotus pond
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a colourful peasant painting, delightfully named 'Flock of Ducks Swimming in Lotus Pond'.  The solid white ducks, contrasting greatly with the midnight black water that they are set upon, are swimming through a channel created by several dozen deep green lotus leaves and a few lilac-coloured lotus flowers.

appraise_text:
The painting of a flock of ducks in a lotus pond is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: wicker-panelled desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a tidy and rather quaint desk, lending colour and texture to any room.  It is made of light, honey-coloured wood, while the sides of the desk and the fronts of the drawers are made of woven strips of wicker-work.  Even the desktop is covered with the same pattern, covered with a heavy pane of glass to allow a smooth writing surface.  There is nothing on the wicker-panelled desk.

appraise_text:
The wicker-panelled desk is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of cane and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: steel pernach
weight: 4 4/9 lb
description:
This formidable-looking mace is, at its most basic level, basically a hefty rod of steel with a weighted head.  A number of triangular flanges fan out from its tip and should be capable of dealing some serious damage, even through plate armour.  The steel at the bottom end has been ridged and then securely wrapped in black leather to provide a sure grip.

appraise_text:
The steel pernach is about three and a half feet long and about six inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: shot glass of sea grape wine
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nicely made shot glass, of the sort usually used to serve spirit measures in pubs and restaurants.  The shot glass of sea grape wine is about half full with three teaspoons of sea grape wine.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The shot glass of sea grape wine is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: dark piano
weight: about two hundred pounds
description:
This is an upright piano fashioned from dark ebony.  The carvings on its case are exquisite, with a motif of darts and knives that almost seems to dance.  The inside of its lid is lined with black velvet, with a padded stool to match.

appraise_text:
The dark piano is about five feet long and about four feet wide.  It is made of ebony and velvet and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large mahogany chest
weight: about a hundred and fifty pounds
description:
This is a large chest made of mahogany.  It is richly decorated with carved oak leaves.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large mahogany chest is about three feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: three dogs playing poker statue
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a stunningly crafted statue.  Obviously sculpted by a master craftsman, it depicts that classic scene of three dogs sitting around a table, wearing hats, monocles, smoking cigars and playing poker.  The workmanship is so fine that you can see fleas on the back of one of the dogs.

appraise_text:
The three dogs playing poker statue is about three and a half feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of stone and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pumice incense burner
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a pumice bowl, sitting atop a wooden pedestal.  The bowl is as smooth as a porous material can be, while the base is smooth, varnished cottonwood.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The pumice incense burner is about three feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pumice and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or three items.


item_name: iron boathook
weight: 3 5/9 lb
special_find_note: af78213c6deaf7a170f5b2484996b9efde96f365
description:
Used mainly to drag a small dinghy closer to the ship, some pirates have found an altogether more violent use for this boathook, namely to strike down an opponent.  The long wooden pole has been tipped with a vicious looking iron hook.

appraise_text:
The iron boathook is about seven feet long and about three inches wide.  It is made of wood and iron and could be used as a weapon of type polearm.


item_name: bottle of Count Magpyr's Red Wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large blood red glass bottle.  This is a old and dusty bottle of Count Magpyr's own red wine, it looks very expensive and it is probably only possible to buy this from the most exclusive of shops.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The large blood red bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: deep blue armchair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a wide and thickly padded armchair, covered in a deep blue fabric.  It looks very soft and comfortable, and generally just the thing for those times when you'd like to sit down and relax in front of a fireplace.

appraise_text:
The deep blue armchair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: High Lord's Robe
special_find_note: a4a93b269a40e4b3ea721d61580553c7be44c6ea
description:
This is a cotton replica of the ornate robes of a High Lord.  It is navy and falls to the floor, with a dragon embroidered in yellow and red curling around it.  The sleeve and neck cuffs are white and are roughly embroidered with a pattern of entangled vines.  A narrow belt holds it in place around the waist.


item_name: scuffed kitchen bench
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This solid kitchen bench stretches along the wall, heavy and dependable.  Its smooth top is made of some weighty redwood, fine-grained and well polished, hardened to a decent chopping surface.  Perhaps because of this, it's also brushed liberally with scuff marks - signs of a well-used kitchen.  There is nothing on the scuffed kitchen bench.

appraise_text:
The scuffed kitchen bench is about nine feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: chubby standard door lock package
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a small, brown paper bag, just the type to hold sweets, peanuts, or any other similar object.  The paper bag is completely full with a chubby standard door lock and a small brass key.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The paper bag is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: apple-leaf wooden sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a simply carved, slightly aged wooden sofa, painted a creamy white, upholstered with soft velvety cushions with a little sag.  Painted on one arm and up the frame of the back is a spray of apple leaves, brush strokes standing out from the smooth cream background.  Here and there among the leaves is a hint of white and rose apple blossom, the colours of which are picked up in the faded tones of the cushions.

appraise_text:
The apple-leaf wooden sofa is about eighteen and a half feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: millefleur tapestry
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
Millefleur tapestries are unique for their stunning background patterns of hundreds of tiny flowers.  Laid over the handstitched blossoms is the image of a unicorn, a traditional symbol of valour and courage.

appraise_text:
The millefleur tapestry is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: slim brown guidebook
description:
A slim, brown guidebook, bound in stiffened canvas with printed lettering above a picture of an old village on the front cover.


item_name: brass gong
weight: about seven pounds
description:
This is a medium-sized brass gong, hanging from a brass frame.  Lazy pandas roll around the surface of the gong, the occasional one actually doing something other than eating or chewing on a stalk of bamboo.  The gong can be hit to make a loud ringing sound and annoy everyone in the room.

appraise_text:
The brass gong is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of brass and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Happy 101st Birthday banner
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a big blue banner decorated with a couple of stars and, and a few candles seemingly melting over the letters.

appraise_text:
The Happy 101st Birthday banner is about three feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of cotton and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: morning star
weight: 5 1/9 lb
description:
The morning star is a piece of wood about a foot long with a chain at one end.  Attached to the chain is a ball with lots of nasty spikes sticking out of it.  It gives you a sudden urge to visit your mother in law.

appraise_text:
The morning star is about two feet long and about four inches wide.  It is made of iron and could be used as a weapon of type flail.


item_name: cast iron cookstove
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a simple cast iron cookstove, lacking a fume hood and many of the frills evident in fancier models.  Although nothing more than a plain and matte black finish adorns its modest exterior, it looks big enough to cook a witch.  There is nothing on the cast iron cookstove.

appraise_text:
The cast iron cookstove is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: [colour] balloon
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small [colour] balloon that you could likely inflate and possibly even hang up somewhere to add a nice jolly partying atmosphere.

appraise_text:
The [colour] balloon is about four inches long and about an inch wide.  It is [colour] and is made of rubber.


item_name: meerschaum ashtray with a Llamedese motif
weight: less than a pound
description:
As meerschaum is a creamy white mineral that comes from the sea where it floats ashore on the waves - or so the carvers of meerschaum claim!  When meerschaum dries, it becomes extremely hard and durable.  When the craftsman gave shape to the stone in his skilled hands, he aspired to create the visionary beauty of a ring of Llamedese shepherdesses and wooly sheep doing a ring dance.  There is nothing on the meerschaum ashtray with a Llamedese motif.

appraise_text:
The meerschaum ashtray with a Llamedese motif is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of stone.  It can hold less than one pound.


item_name: blue seashell
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a pretty blue seashell.  It is mostly white, but a slight haze of blue covers the ridges on the outer side as well as through the smooth part of the inner surface.

appraise_text:
The blue seashell is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of shell.


item_name: burnished money toad
weight: about four pounds
description:
Carved out of the dark burgundy Shou Shan stone, the toad is covered with ancient Agatean coins, which symbolises the coming of great wealth.  Aside from the luck that the money toad will bring you, the meticulous craftsmanship of this work makes it a valuable piece of art.

appraise_text:
The burnished money toad is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: item of disposable holy power
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small block of holy incense that will purify the area in preparation for a religious ritual if it is burnt.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of holy incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: antique cup
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a cup made of fine porcelain.  It is glazed white and decorated with some sort of flower pattern.  It looks very antique and expensive.

appraise_text:
The antique cup is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, nine items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: black-bladed sword
weight: 5 5/9 lb
description:
Starting at a golden ball-shaped pommel base, moving up to a two-handed grip and onto a bi-pointed grip guard, this sword is impressive from hilt to tip.  The actual blade itself is rather odd.  The edges of the blade are black while its midsection is embossed with a golden pattern based on a darker gold-coloured metal.  The tip of the blade resides some five feet away from the hilt and is as sharp as the edges of the blade, and just as fine.

appraise_text:
The black-bladed sword is about five feet long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type heavy-sword.


item_name: Pishite rod [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This miniature weapon is comprised of a tiny wooden shaft, one end of which is connected via chains to three polished silver balls.  The other end of the shaft is wrapped in strips of leather.

appraise_text:
The silver flail is about six inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of silver and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: colourful Claro Cliff soup bowl
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a well-made soup bowl, glazed in colourful shades.  On it is a picture of a lake, boldly painted in primary colours.  A small CC monogram has been carefully signed on the reverse.  There is nothing on the colourful Claro Cliff soup bowl.

appraise_text:
The colourful Claro Cliff soup bowl is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pottery.  It can hold about 4 pounds.


item_name: ebony drinks cabinet
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This squat and slightly curved drinks cabinet is made from the finest ebony.  The glass door allows the interior of the cabinet to be seen and a small brass lock ensures that any spirits placed within are safe from unscrupulous servants.  It is adorned with a small cloak and dagger symbol carved centrally on the frame above the door.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The ebony drinks cabinet is about three feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 27 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: dried head from Patter of Pishe
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small, dried, spherical object is being marketed as the head of the Pishite prophet, Patter.  The fact it has long, pale green hair sprouting from the top of the bulb, er scalp, that the face on it looks as if it has been carved on and that it smells of onions is probably a hint towards how authentic it actually is.  It has a small label attached to it, reading "Thee Heade From Patter Ofe Pishe".  It is all dry and shrivelled up.

appraise_text:
The dried head from Patter of Pishe is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It isn't really made of anything and looks edible.


item_name: antique rolltop desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Years of use have left their mark, but not marred the finish of this lovingly polished piece.  The wooden slats forming the cover of the desk still slide smoothly on their gleaming brass hinges and rails, and the writing surface is covered with a well worn, burnished leather blotter.  Old brass drawer pulls shine subtly against the dark stained wood, their locks glinting in the light.  Overall, the heavy and solid workmanship, built to last generations, makes this a classic and pleasingly substantial piece.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The antique rolltop desk is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: glass-topped oak desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is an elegant L-shaped desk, made of high quality oak and topped with a pane of glass.  Under the glass, the wood has been inlaid with little triangles of wood in different colours, radiating out in a delicate, hypnotic pattern from the centre.  There is nothing on the glass-topped oak desk.

appraise_text:
The glass-topped oak desk is about five feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: colourful Claro Cliff milk jug
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a well-made circular milk jug, decorated with a brightly coloured pattern of circles and swirls, each one in a different, contrasting shade.  A small CC monogram has been carefully signed on the bottom.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The colourful Claro Cliff milk jug is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of clay and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about twenty items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: oil lamp
appraise_text: The oil lamp is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide. It is made of tin.
description:
This is a metal oil lamp, which reeks of lamp oil.  The lamp is not lit, and it has some oil left in it.


item_name: leggy chest
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
Supported by outwardly curving legs of blackened wrought iron, this pale wooden chest is bound at regular intervals by horizontal silver bands engraved with abstract patterns.  A band of ebony marks the split between chest and lid, and it has been overlaid by ivory silhouettes of cherubs.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The leggy chest is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 27 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: slippery Jack
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small bowl of soup, the main ingredient of which appears to be lard.  It is blue, as opposed to Slippery Jill, the other local delicacy, which is pink.  The reasons for this are lost in the mists of time, and are probably best left there.


item_name: The bottled scent of lavender fields
appraise_text: The small pale purple amphora is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of clay.
weight: less than a pound
description:
Fashioned from quality clay and glazed a delicate shade of pale purple, this small amphora has been carefully painted with silhouettes of competing athletes in white.  A classical Ephebian design, it is quite charming in a certain epicene way.  Its ears are tall and elegant, arching to a slightly pointy angle to allow easy stacking and handling.  The stopper is decorated with a simple, wavy black line and fastened to the amphora with a braided silk bond in pearly white.  It is almost full of fresh lavender perfume, which could be applied to someone.


item_name: hairwreath of jasmine
description:
Sweet-smelling jasmine are woven into deep green ferns to make a circlet of flowers to set into your hair.


item_name: silver-framed painting of Shoo-Li
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a large sheet of silk which has been suspended in a frame of silver.  The silk has been delicately painted with soft pastel watercolours in a depiction of the rooftops of Shoo-Li at sunset.  The roofs are dappled in many colours provided by the fading rays of the sun over the Great Wall.

appraise_text:
The silver-framed painting of Shoo-Li is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Sandelfonian rod [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This miniature sceptre is made of oak.  On the top is a tiny orb of marble, all swirling greys and smoothed to perfection.  The shaft is in wrapped red tape, to add a splash of colour.

appraise_text:
The marble sceptre is about nine inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of stone and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: painting of a misty mountain range
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a watercolour painting of a range of mountains skirting a misty lake.  Fiery red trees border the indescript water's edge, snaking their branches out horizontally more than vertically.  The mountains have been painted complementing shades of steel grey and Djelian blue, while the water itself is a strangely creamy white.

appraise_text:
The painting of a misty mountain range is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: some methi
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a a small pile of yellow methi seeds, about one seed.  A short-stemmed herb with round leaves that grow in threes.  Its yellow seeds have a bitter taste.


item_name: small packet
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small paper packet designed to wrap small things in for easier handling.  The small packet is almost full with some colourful confetti.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The small packet is about six inches long and not very wide.  It is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, or ten items.


item_name: The sweet scent of lush pine forests
weight: less than a pound
description:
Fashioned from quality clay and glazed a delicate shade of gold tinted sage green, this small amphora has been carefully painted with silhouettes of competing athletes in white.  A classical Ephebian design, it is quite charming in a certain epicene way.  Its ears are tall and elegant, arching to a slightly pointy angle to allow easy stacking and handling.  The stopper is decorated with a simple, wavy black line and fastened to the amphora with a braided silk bond in pearly white.  It is almost full of pine seed perfume, which could be applied to someone.

appraise_text:
The small gold tinted sage green amphora is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: massive ebony bookcase
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This large black bookcase is made of the finest woods and is beautifully carved with neat rectangular borders which dissolve into thick vines that twine down the sides as if they were growing from the floor.  There is nothing on the massive ebony bookcase.

appraise_text:
The massive ebony bookcase is about seven feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of ebony and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 77 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: pine basilisk bed
weight: about a hundred and fifty pounds
description:
Small and confined, this pine bed in no way resembles a regular bed.  A rather oversized wooden skeleton of the basilisk is tightly wrapped around it, hundreds of smooth and pointy bones surrounding a rough mattress.  The skeletal structure seemingly acts as a barrier to prevent the fearless sleeper from accidentally rolling out of the basilisk's deadly trap.  From behind the headboard rises the basilisk's skull, its mouth wide open and fangs bared.  Fortunately for the sleeper, at least no eyes have been inserted into the skull, although there is very little comfort in that.

appraise_text:
The pine basilisk bed is about seven feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: sapphire studded shield
weight: 13 3/9 lb
description:
An impressive dragon is picked out on the front of this shield in sparkling sapphires, shadowed in silver.  It exudes decadence - the kind where you have gems studded on the front of your shield, despite this being a terribly precarious position for gems to be studded, in order to bankrupt your rivals by forcing them to keep up with your ridiculous fashions in a grand display of superior wealth and inferior common sense.  The blue leather strap on the back of the shield enables easy holding as well as a touch of style.

appraise_text:
The sapphire studded shield is about four feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of steel and looks like it could be held as a shield.


item_name: fifty six piece dinner set in ornate chest
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This small chest is made of heavy wood.  Its lid has ancient Djelian hieroglyphics etched into it.  The lock is adorned with a silver piece that resembles a sphinx.  It is very elegant.  The inside of the chest is set out with neatly cut, silk lined compartments to hold several different types of cutlery.  The ornate cutlery chest is almost full with two sterling silver serving spoons, six sterling silver dessert spoons, six sterling silver dessert knives, six sterling silver dessert forks, six sterling silver soup spoons, six sterling silver shrimp forks, six sterling silver salad forks, six sterling silver dinner knives, six sterling silver dinner forks and six sterling silver teaspoons.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The ornate cutlery chest is about nine inches long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 26 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: wooden Djelian shield
weight: 2 4/9 lb
description:
This is a wooden Djelian shield.  It is rectangular with a curved top.  It is very light which makes it easy to use, but doesn't provide much protection.

appraise_text:
The wooden Djelian shield is about a foot long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of wood and looks like it could be held as a shield.


item_name: light grey silk backpack
weight: 4 2/9 lb
description:
The light grey backpack is made of durable silk for you to store all those things you need.  Its seams are made in a dark blue colour and contrast the surfaces.  Rather sporty.  The light grey silk backpack has one main pocket and two side pockets.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The light grey silk backpack is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is light grey and is made of silk and looks like you could wear it.  It can hold about 44 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: black amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed a sooty matte black, this amphora carries nary a pattern nor a decoration, but the base seems terribly thick, and has had a pad of black felt glued to the underside.  A work of art, its handles are sturdy and thick.  Its stopper is made of oiled cork wrapped in muffling black silk, sealing perfectly and without a squeak, attached to the neck by a fuzzy thick black string, too short to allow the stopper to strike the amphora.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The black amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: exquisite kalamata olives
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a shallow, unadorned, and cheaply made clay dish.  The small clay dish is almost completely full with seven Kalamata olives.  It is almost completely full.

appraise_text:
The small clay dish is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of ceramic and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: small block of lotus-scented incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have a subtle aroma of flowers.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of lotus-scented incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: the finest black olives in Ephebe
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a shallow, unadorned, and cheaply made clay dish.  The small clay dish is almost completely full with eleven black olives.  It is almost completely full.

appraise_text:
The small clay dish is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of ceramic and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: snake table
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
Constructed from a single piece of hickory, this impressive table stands on four cast-iron legs.  Around its edge two snakes have been depicted, a clockwise-facing one in gold, and an anti-clockwise facing one in silver. The snakes intertwine as they circle the table, and each snake appears to be eating its own tail.  There is nothing on the snake table.

appraise_text:
The snake table is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: djelian clothing catalogue
appraise_text: The open djelian clothing catalogue is not very long and not very wide. It is made of paper.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a rather large leather-bound book, its title embossed upon the cover in an elegant script.  Its pages are crisp and new, and the colour of the ink on the cover is still vibrant.  It is open at page 17.


item_name: ebony music stand
weight: about three pounds
description:
Made from blackest ebony, this music stand is a design classic.  It stands upon a triangular base, supported by three ivory casters.  The stem is intricately worked into a spiral, while the head is rather amusingly formed from a mirrored C-clef.  There is nothing on the ebony music stand.

appraise_text:
The ebony music stand is about a foot long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of ebony and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: plump cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
If there was ever such as a thing as a happy member of the brassica family, this is it.  This plump cabbage looks like its entire life has been focused on looking plump and good for eating.  It looks unusually plump and good for eating.


item_name: Quirmian dining table
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This very large dining table has been made by a family of cabinet makers who have served the aristocracy of Quirm for the last 375 years.  The classic shape has been carved from the finest walnut and inlaid in a floral pattern with teak, cherry, ash and greenheart, then polished to a mirror finish.  There is nothing on the Quirmian dining table.

appraise_text:
The Quirmian dining table is about eight feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: shot glass of red wine
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nicely made shot glass, of the sort usually used to serve spirit measures in pubs and restaurants.  The shot glass of red wine is about half full with three teaspoons of red wine.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The shot glass of red wine is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: bottle of white lily perfume
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a perfume bottle made out of clear crystal.  It is almost full of white lily perfume which can be sprayed onto someone.

appraise_text:
The clear perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: bottle of hyacinth perfume
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a perfume bottle made out of blue crystal.  It is almost full of hyacinth perfume which can be sprayed onto someone.

appraise_text:
The blue perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: steel shoto
weight: 2 4/9 lb
special_find_note: From a locked safe in BP.
description:
This sword has been crafted using the finest steel.  The straight blade is slender and has an extremely sharp tip that is perfect for thrusting attacks.  The hilt is weighted to balance the blade perfectly and has been wrapped in high grade red leather.

appraise_text:
The steel shoto is about two feet long and about three inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type sword.


item_name: ironwork bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
Cast from blackened iron, this bed stands on four sturdy legs, with nary a side in sight.  The legs and base are wrought from fine iron wires, woven into a dense, weight-supporting pattern.  A regal headboard rears in the expected place, filigreed scrollwork featuring heavily in its design.  From the top of the headboard, intricately scalloped braces extend over the bed, supporting a short, crimson canopy.

appraise_text:
The ironwork bed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: toy heart [build-a-bear]
appraise_text: The toy heart is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of wood.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a wooden toy heart, painted bright red.  It could be pressed into the stuffing of a cuddly toy.


item_name: postal card
appraise_text: The postal card is about four inches long and about six inches wide. It is made of cardboard.
weight: less than a pound
description:
The front of this card displays a newbie, all dressed up in armour made of bones.  He, or possibly she (it is hard to make out beneath the big skull helmet), is waving a giant sword at a wooden dummy.  An arm is spinning towards him, but he appears not to have seen this.  The back is left white, and can be used to write on.


item_name: Applique book for Intermediate and Expert Quilters
weight: less than a pound
description:
The cover of this book features the Ramtop mountains which, for some reason has a patchwork quilt draped over it.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed applique pattern book is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: serving of beans 'n' chips
description:
A helping of beans 'n' chips, consisting of, well, beans and chips.  The beans are covered in some sort of tomato sauce.


item_name: iron candle holder
weight: about three pounds
description:
This plain iron candlestick is nothing special to look at.  There is nothing on the iron candle holder.

appraise_text:
The iron candle holder is about five feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of iron and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: piece of cinnamon bark
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a piece of bark from a cinnamon tree.  It could probably be ground into tasty powder for flavouring food.


item_name: bottle of Fine Quirmian White Wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large light green glass bottle.  This is a vintage bottle of Quirmian White wine, it looks very expensive; it is probably only possible to buy this from the most exclusive of shops.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The large light green bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: mado screen
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This traditional mado screen has a double-sided latticework frame made of lacquered red cedar.  Between the two sides of the frame lies a large sheet of smooth white rice paper that looks quite delicate and fragile.  

appraise_text:
The mado screen is about six feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of paper and wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: violet perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small bottle.  It has a nozzle at the top which you could probably press to spray yourself with the odour contained.

appraise_text:
The violet perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: whole cat corpse
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about three pounds
description:
This almost complete cat corpse looks a little like that of a chicken, although it probably tastes very different.  The fur has been totally cleaned off the corpse and the head, paws and collar have been removed, although it still doesn't look that appetising.


item_name: small snowglobe
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small glass sphere, flimsily attached to a little stand which stops it from rolling away.  The glass is clear, and inside you can see [scene] and lots of white flakes, making a nice winter scene.  The snowflakes inside the globe are lying serenely.

appraise_text:
The small snowglobe is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass.


item_name: some marjoram
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of marjoram, about eight stalks.  Marjoram, with its large, roundish leaves is popular as a spice.


item_name: Lancrastian sampler
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
Lovingly stitched by hand, this is a beautiful Lancrastian sampler of a kind that decorates kitchens all across the Ramtops.  The tapestry is decorated with little spiders and delicate leaves.

appraise_text:
The Lancrastian sampler is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [type/gender/guild] dummy
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a finely crafted dummy, designed for displaying prized clothes and armour on.  [Adjective], it has been made to look like [type], and it would make an impressive addition to any room.  [She/He] is standing.  There is nothing on the [type] dummy.

appraise_text:
The [type] dummy is about five and a half feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 200 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: chariot of war stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  A chariot of war.

appraise_text:
The chariot of war stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: pewter balance
weight: about a pound
description:
This balance is unusual in two respects: it is somewhat larger than one would expect, and no matter what is placed in them, the two pans are always at the same level.  Sandelfon would smile on such an object were he not already wearing a carefully neutral expression.  There is nothing on the pewter balance.

appraise_text:
The pewter balance is about three feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of pewter and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or ten items.


item_name: glass tumbler of grapefruit juice
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a short glass tumbler, of the sort usually found in pubs and restaurants.  The glass tumbler of grapefruit juice is completely full with one cup of grapefruit juice.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The glass tumbler of grapefruit juice is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: pleasant blue flower
description:
This strange blue flower has an enclosing petal formation, and is the colour of dark blue velvet.  It seems slightly strange, in a way that you can't quite put your finger on.  It looks quite stunning when it catches the light, with the deep shades making it appear soft and gentle.


item_name: Old Ramtops Tobacco
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a smart red leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  Fine gold stitching holds the pouch firmly together at the seams.  The red leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of old Ramtops tobacco.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The red leather pouch is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of leather and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or four items.


item_name: Bes Pelargic Tobacco
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small brown leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  The stitching at the seams is slightly ragged.  The brown leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of Bes Pelargic Blue tobacco.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The brown leather pouch is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of leather and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or four items.


item_name: heavy lorken desk
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
Made from thick pieces of black lorken, this desk has an aura of solidness even apart from its impressive size.  Clean lines and the inlaid maker's mark in the bottom left corner of the desk indicate the work of a skilled craftsman.  This formidable-looking desk is perfect for making those approaching it feel insignificant, and is the desk every Agatean official dreams of having in their office.  There is nothing on the heavy lorken desk.

appraise_text:
The heavy lorken desk is about four and a half feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 33 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: Tellif of Fish's hair
appraise_text: Tellif of Fish's hair is roughly a couple of inches long and not very wide. It is made of hair.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This hair is supposed to have come from Tellif, an early prophet of Fish.  This is quite unlikely as Tellif did not have tabby hair, or smell distressingly of Cat.  It has a small label attached to it, reading "Tellif Ofe Fishe's Haire".


item_name: bottle of red rose perfume
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a perfume bottle made out of pink crystal.  It is almost full of red rose perfume which can be sprayed onto someone.

appraise_text:
The pink perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: Soul Cake Days card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
This card is obviously for the celebration of the Soul Cake Days festival.  Since no-one quite remembers what the feast is for and why they are celebrating it, this card is left pretty much blank.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The Soul Cake Days card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: weathered scarab chair
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
At first this looks as if it's a bare wooden chair.  However, looking in more detail it's a home to pattern after pattern of beautiful scarab carvings.  It looks fairly comfortable.

appraise_text:
The weathered scarab chair is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: mixed bag of flavoured Djeli beans
weight: less than a pound
description:
This bag is made from white, slightly-waxed paper.  While hardly the most durable of containers, it does at least appear to be strong enough to safely hold a number of small items.  The paper bag is about half full with [random beans]. It is open.

appraise_text:
The paper bag is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 4 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: armet
description:
This is a large, rounded, steel helm, which has a long thin plate extending from its rear to cover the back of the neck.  To the upper sides of the helm two cheek pieces are hinged, which project forwards to cover the nose and chin, leaving a narrow gap for vision and ventilation.  This gap is in turn covered with a visor for increased protection.


item_name: Klatchian steel tower shield
weight: 14 3/9 lb
special_find_note: Smuggler caves chest loot.
description:
This extremely weighty shield has been made from the finest Klatchian steel.  Strong, durable, and weighty, it would be capable of protecting someone from even the most determined of attacks - at least if you were able to carry it.  An ornate representation of a phoenix in flight has been inlaid upon the central boss of the shield in gold.

appraise_text:
The Klatchian steel tower shield is about four and a half feet long and about three and a half feet wide.  It is made of klatchian steel and looks like it could be held as a shield.


item_name: crescent moon shield
weight: 6 2/9 lb
description:
This is a expertly-worked crescent-shaped piece of bronze.  The boss of the shield has been ornamented with intricately-wrought bronze myrtle leaves that shade to blue-green in places. Its shape is such that, although it provides less comprehensive protection than a larger shield, it is much more maneuverable.

appraise_text:
The crescent moon shield is about three feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of bronze and looks like it could be held as a shield.


item_name: colourful sponge cake
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a large sponge cake, covered in a rainbow of bright, colourful icing.  A frill of puffy white icing sugar runs around the rim of the cake, making it look like a small lake of bright colour and hue.


item_name: glass Pishe figurine
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a rather abstract representation of Pishe, who is only recognisable by the feminity of the figure and the inexplicable appearance of wetness.  The rather large figurine stands about a foot high, and be very useful for placing on the floor where someone might not see it and trip or at least stub their toe.

appraise_text:
The glass Pishe figurine is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: lacquered handpainted vase
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Standing tall in its 24-inch grandness, this beautiful vase is handcrafted and handpainted with multi-layers of rich black lacquer, on which Agatean nature scenery is handpainted in shades of brown, gold, blue and green with bold energy and flare.

appraise_text:
The lacquered handpainted vase is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or twelve items.


item_name: wicker sleigh bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
Dark and light coloured wicker is woven over a solid pine frame that has been carved into a shape similar to the Hogfather's sleigh.  Unfortunately, it is not filled with gifts, nor does it come with a team of flying pigs to pull it.  It does look comfortable to sleep in, though.

appraise_text:
The wicker sleigh bed is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: velvet and vermine sofa
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This gorgeous sofa is covered with crushed red velvet and trimmed with black and white vermine fur.  The velvet has the virtue of hiding blood stains, and the fur trim on the skirt catches those dust bunnies a real treat.

appraise_text:
The velvet and vermine sofa is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: set of six nimmt cards
description: A set of glossy cards with artists' views of things drawn all over them.
weight: You heft the set of six nimmt cards and guess that it weighs less than a pound.
appraise_text:
The set of six nimmt cards is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Hogswatch card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a pretty and pompous Hogswatchday card, complete with a drawing of the traditional Hogswatch oak that seems to be decorated with real sausages.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The Hogswatch card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: alignment pyramid
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a plain piece of wood, shaped like a pyramid with four triangular sides.  Three of the sides have a lever on them: a black, a grey and a white one, while the fourth can be used to put it down somewhere.

appraise_text:
The alignment pyramid is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: diamond-patterned wicker sofa
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This wicker-work sofa curves around in a comfortable semi-oval, the back sweeping down and around to form the braided arms.  It has been upholstered in natural tones to set off the wood, and the woven pattern has been interrupted in the centre of the back in such a way as to make a decorative diamond shape that draws the eye and complements the weave elsewhere.

appraise_text:
The diamond-patterned wicker sofa is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of cane and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: fancy green card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
This card is coloured in wavy vertical patterns of deep shades of green, a very nice effect indeed.  In the middle is some writing pressed in golden letters.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The fancy green card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: bronzed helminth
description: This is an intestinal worm someone has lovingly bronzed. Some people will keep anything.
appraise_text:
The bronzed helminth is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: antique wooden escritoire
weight: about four pounds
description:
Deceptively spindly legs support this dainty writing table, lending it an elegant air of fragility.  While the actual wood it is made from is impossible to determine, the beauty of the darkly stained and glossy finish of the work surface is only enhanced by the character of a few polished-over scars.  The dainty brass knobs of the drawers are worn from time and handling, but still gleam with a rich sheen.  Certainly an old, but well-loved and timeless piece of furniture that is both serviceable and decorative.  There is nothing on the antique wooden escritoire.

appraise_text:
The antique wooden escritoire is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: sto stalker cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a cabbage that grows to a huge size in all weather conditions, but seems to follow you home and wait outside the privy at night when you're in there after a good helping of cabbage beer.


item_name: ancient bronze helm
special_find_note: 339bc85e0fed81f26cb529d8ebe3d070facd7304
description:
Throughout the proud history of the Hong family, many of its nobles were recognised for greatness and courage.  The first Lord Hong was lauded by the Emperor for resourcefulness and cunning in defence of the kingdom.  Legend has it that this simple and practical helm was the very one that Lord Hong used.  The construction is similar to modern jingasa with an added cuirass to protect the wearer's neck from harm.  The entire helm is constructed from tarnished bronze and its surface is marred only by a single rent in the crown of the helmet.  Lord Hong or one of his successors must have encountered the more modern wonder of steel.  The helm itself is no longer fit to be used.


item_name: some ground shells
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of ground seashells, about ten pinches, gathered by the sea shore, then ground for chicken feed.


item_name: sand-coloured candle
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This candle has a slightly rough texture, and the wax is variegated in sandy shades ranging from light tan brown to a deep rich ochre.  It is not currently lit.  It is brand new.

appraise_text:
The sand-coloured candle is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of beeswax and could be used as a weapon.


item_name: chrysanthemum stained glass fan lamp
weight: about a pound
description:
This elegant lamp features a stained glass fan which has been attached to a stone pedestal base.  Behind the fan on the pedestal sits a small depression where a tealight may be placed to illuminate the glass and shower fractured colours into the surrounding room.  The stained glass on this fan depicts two large chrysanthemums, one pink and one white, which bend toward each other, green leaves splaying out under their petals.  There is nothing on the chrysanthemum stained glass fan lamp.

appraise_text:
The chrysanthemum stained glass fan lamp is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: strand of [colour] thread
description: This is a [colour] silk thread, useful for embroidery and repairing clothes.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
A [colour] silk thread is about a foot long and about an inch wide.  It is [colour] and is made of silk.


item_name: butterfly wind chime
weight: about a pound
description:
This wind chime is made of a thick blue wire, able to be attached to the wall and twisted in a spiral.  From the wire hangs a set of stained-glass chimes, each one a brightly-coloured butterfly.

appraise_text:
The butterfly wind chime is about a foot and a half long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: rusty chainmail
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This looks like it was once a chainmail shirt.  At the moment, though, it's pretty well rusted solid.  There's certainly no way you could wear it.  Maybe if you polished the rust off it you could make use of it.

appraise_text:
The rusty chainmail is about two and a half feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of iron.


item_name: wrought iron table
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a small, round table made of wrought iron that has been painted black.  The iron has been fashioned to look like coiled, twisting snakes.  There is nothing on the wrought iron table.

appraise_text:
The wrought iron table is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of iron and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 30 pounds, or ten items.


item_name: oaken minotaur table
weight: about fifty pounds
description:
This oaken table appears to have been purposely left unstained and bare.  A bronze statue of a nightmarish beast, in Ephebe known as the minotaur, forms the sole leg of the table, holding the tabletop in a grip so tight that it has cracked the wood along the edge.  The minotaur's bull-like face is distorted with a ferocious expression, one of pure rage, as the beast appears to be frozen in the motion of throwing the tabletop at an unsuspecting victim.  It would be a perfect piece for whoever wishes to keep their guests on edge.  There is nothing on the oaken minotaur table.

appraise_text:
The oaken minotaur table is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of oak and bronze and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 27 pounds, or about fifty items.


item_name: stylish Gapp doll
appraise_text: The stylish Gapp doll is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide. It is made of brass.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This strange little doll is a miniature brass coathanger, adorned with a yellow corduroy scarf.  The scarf has button eyes sewn, and they appear to have a faint glimmer of life to them.


item_name: filigreed rowan case
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a small case made from rowan which has been completely enveloped in octiron filigree.  The design is fanciful and intricate and the octiron has been polished to high reflective shine.  In the centre of the cases lid is a small plaque which mirrors your gaze perfectly.  At the bottom are four small claw-like feet which the case uses to keep hold of the surface.  Any surface, really.  Between the legs, in the centre of the bottom of the case is another small plaque which might give some information.  It is in perfect condition.  There is no ink in the well.  It contains no paper.  It radiates pure octarine brilliance.  It has the hazy octarine sparkle of a magical talisman.

appraise_text:
The filigreed rowan case is about nine inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of rowan.


item_name: painting of three stalks of bamboo
weight: about four pounds
description:
This simple black and white painting depicts the 'Three Friends of Winter' - three lone bamboo stalks that are adorned only with a cluster of plum blossoms at their base.  On the surface a cold and lonely painting, it begets the deepness of friendship and reminds the viewer that bamboo bends, but is not broken.

appraise_text:
The painting of three stalks of bamboo is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: medium beaker
description: A medium glass beaker perfect for alchemical work.
weight: about half a pound
appraise_text:
The medium beaker is about four inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, fifteen items, or about 3 gills.


item_name: iron broomstick
weight: 4 4/9 lb
special_find_note: Loot from Queen Shelox.
description:
This is a hefty broomstick with a shaft made of solid iron.  It probably wouldn't be very practical for sweeping, but if you gave it a good swing it would certainly do some serious damage to anything that got in its way.  It has the hazy octarine sparkle of a magical talisman.

appraise_text:
The iron broomstick is about five feet long and an inch wide.  It is made of iron and could be used as a weapon of type polearm.


item_name: handful of rancid fish noodles
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a handful of sloppy noodles.  You can clearly see bits of what looks like it might once have been meat clumped in the noodle mass, with its own distinct fishy aroma.


item_name: Lancrastian coffee table
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This coffee table is obviously from the Lancre area, as it has the traditional forest smells laced in its materials.  These are quite expensive indeed, since they are usually quite rare.  But not today, it would seem.  It is obviously well built, using fine materials and an eye for perfection.  You could probably get quite a bit of... use, out of this coffee table.  Several pairs of handcuffs hang jauntily from the legs, along with a small key dangling on a delicate chain.  There is nothing on the Lancrastian coffee table.

appraise_text:
The Lancrastian coffee table is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: some tyler weed
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of tyler weed, about one stalk.  A cheerful looking herb, with bright yellow flowers with blue spots.  The leaves are a strange, fuzzy red.


item_name: bottle of vanilla bubblebath
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small bottle seems to contain some soapy liquid that glows ever so slightly with a tinge of pale white through the tinted glass.  The liquid within could be poured from the bottle when in a suitable environment to make a nice, relaxing bubblebath.

appraise_text:
The bottle of vanilla bubblebath is about four inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is pale white and is made of glass.


item_name: pile of dark burgundy velvet cushions
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This is a large pile of comfortable dark burgundy velvet cushions.  Very soft and plush, the velvet caresses the skin making them ideal for cuddling.  They have been arranged on the floor for sitting, lying and lounging.

appraise_text:
The pile of dark burgundy velvet cushions is about three feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of velvet and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: wedding invitation card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
The invitation card is large and strikingly white, with golden frames around the picture of the happy wedding pair in the centre.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The wedding invitation card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: big sand hourglass
weight: about four pounds
description:
This timepiece consists of two big glass chambers joined with a thin neck.  It is filled with fine, yellow sand.  Controlling the flow is achieved, as usually with hourglasses, by turning it.  The upper chamber is empty.

appraise_text:
The big hourglass is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: bright yellow banana peel
weight: less than a pound
description:
This piece of yellow rubber is an almost perfect replica of a banana peel.  It is the sort of thing that would not go missing from a prankster's toolkit.

appraise_text:
The bright yellow banana peel is about four inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of rubber.


item_name: some Tender Tentacles
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is by far the most sought after type of squishi in all of the Counterweight Continent.  The tentacles are collected from every sort of sea dwelling creature that owns a set.  They are then left to dry for exactly eight hours to instill some magic into the flavour, and after the drying process they are left to soak in the chef's special sauce containing eight secret herbs and spices.  Following this the tentacles are pounded with a hammer until they are exactly tender enough.  After all this preparation, the tentacles are finally ready to cook.  The way they are cooked is a secret, but the end result is amazing.  There are eight tentacles laid out on the plate, all from a different species of slimy sea creature.  Each has its own texture and flavour, and each could keep a poor family alive for a month with its smell alone.


item_name: painted red mahogany chest
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This vibrant red mahogany chest has been generously lacquered, its front face divided into eight squares, each containing an elaborately designed circle bordered by dragons, tigers and lions and filled with peony blossoms.  The large chest has a flip top lid that can be propped up with a thick golden rod which fits securely into a slot in the main structure.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The painted red mahogany chest is about two feet long and about three and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: small cyan dictionary
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small, compact dictionary designed to aid the Agatean speaking person in their Ephebian studies.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed small cyan dictionary is about four inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: large snowglobe
appraise_text: The large snowglobe is about four inches long and about four inches wide. It is made of glass.
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a sizeable glass sphere, flimsily attached to a stand which stops it from rolling away.  It's fairly hefty and probably best left on a desk.  The glass is clear, showing [scene] inside, nicely detailed.  There are many white flakes, too.  They must surely make quite a storm when shaken.  The snowflakes are lying over [scene] and covering the bottom of the globe.


item_name: [colour] leather sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Comfort itself is idealised in this sofa.  Well-padded curving arms surround large, puffy cushions that look perfect for sinking into.  The straight, but somewhat squat back is also overstuffed, lending itself well to anyone with a penchant for simply sprawling about.  It is covered entirely in old, well-cared-for [colour] leather the colour of [colourful description], and practically begs to be lounged upon.

appraise_text:
The old [colour] leather sofa is about seven and a half feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and leather and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: ash spear
weight: 5 5/9 lb
description:
This spear has been made from a long piece of shaped and polished ash with a steel spearhead attached to one end.  It looks quite sharp and could cause considerable damage in the right hands.

appraise_text:
The ash spear is about five and a half feet long and about four inches wide.  It is made of wood and steel and could be used as a weapon of type polearm.


item_name: bamboo bedside table
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
The framework of this bedside table consists of bamboo poles, but above the surface stretches a layer of leather - probably water-buffalo.  There is nothing on the bamboo bedside table.

appraise_text:
The bamboo bedside table is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 5 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: Dish of Glistening Crunchy Orange Stuff
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
It's glistening, it's orange, and if you were to eat it, you think it might be crunchy.  Unfortunately, you have no idea about what it's actually made from.  It smells good, though.


item_name: golf tee
appraise_text: The golf tee is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of wood.
weight: less than a pound
description:
A tiny wooden golf tee, carved by sweatshops of gnomes high in the Mountains of the Sun in Howondaland to sell to men in tartan trousers to balance their balls on.


item_name: Hublandish throwing knife
weight: 1 3/9 lb
description:
Sharpened for less than an inch at the tip, and without a guard, this knife is clearly designed for throwing.  Made from one piece of rough-forged grey iron, the hilt wrapped with leather for a good grip, this is nothing more or less than a weapon for killing people rather than showing off with.

appraise_text:
The Hublandish throwing knife is about nine inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of iron and could be used as a weapon of type dagger.


item_name: Happy Luck kitchen range
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
The Happy Luck kitchen range displays an elegance that has gone unequalled since the century of the zhu-min duck.  Built during an age of artistic and engineering innovation in Agatea, this range features highly detailed castings which enhance the look of this one of a kind stove.  Cooking on a beautiful range like the Happy Luck will warm the heart, draw peace, prosperity and good fortune into the home and will also make a good attempt at appeasing the appetite.  The hearth is blackened with ashes and old embers.  There is nothing on the Happy Luck kitchen range.

appraise_text:
The Happy Luck kitchen range is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: wine glass of Young Boy's Peaches
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a nicely made wine glass, of the sort usually used to serve red, white and rose wine in pubs and restaurants.  The wine glass of Young Boy's Peaches is almost full with some Young Boy's Peaches.  It is almost full.

appraise_text:
The wine glass of Young Boy's Peaches is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eight items, or about 1 gill.


item_name: bottle of sweet jasmine perfume
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a perfume bottle made out of yellow crystal.  It is almost full of sweet jasmine perfume which can be sprayed onto someone.

appraise_text:
The yellow perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: silver crystal dragon goblet
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a tall goblet, standing at just over two feet, that looks as though it was made for a dragon.  Cut from flawless crystal, the cup sits on a tall silver stem around which a noble silver dragon has wrapped itself protectively.  The dragon's wings are unfurled, embracing the cup, and the tail curls around the stem several times.

appraise_text:
The silver crystal dragon goblet is about two feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: used scrabble board
weight: less than a pound
description:
An old and beaten scrabble board with enough pieces missing to make the game virtually unplayable.  Forming words tends to be a difficult task without any vowels in your hand.  Current Scores:  Not currently playing: red, green, yellow and blue.  The bag has zero tiles left.

appraise_text:
The used scrabble board is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: shot glass of sherry
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nicely made shot glass, of the sort usually used to serve spirit measures in pubs and restaurants.  The shot glass of sherry is about half full with three teaspoons of sherry.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The shot glass of sherry is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: portrait of Queen Grimnir the Impaler
weight: about five pounds
description:
Skin like alabaster, hair the colour of a raven's wing, lips stained blood-red, this portrait portrays a woman of surpassing grace and beauty.  She in no way resembles the real Queen Grimnir who was, alas, quite stout, buck-toothed, and possessed of a squint that any Ramtops witch would envy.  Fortunately, the artist had a strong sense of self-preservation and painted The Impaler the way she envisioned herself.  The portrait is set in an ornate, gilded frame.

appraise_text:
The portrait of Queen Grimnir the Impaler is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: flame red amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed in fiery oranges, this amphora carries deep red flames that flow from its base to lick and lap around the fluted pouring spout.  Slightly smaller than most, the amphora carries with it a whiff of tropical danger.  A work of art, its handles are broad and shaped to allow easy pouring of small amounts, and its cylindrical ceramic stopper has been formed in the shape of a hot pepper, painted a searing red, and attached to the neck by a warning yellow ribbon.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The flame red amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: fruit cake
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This cake looks rich and delicious, made from an old-fashioned spice cake batter, which has been sweetened with honey, orange juice and liqueur, brandy and lemon essence.  It is loaded with cashews, walnuts, and an overly generous amount of naturally dried fruits, including apricots, dates and raisins.  It is amazing it still holds together, as it looks to be more fruit than cake.


item_name: creepy wooden carving
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a wooden carving, painted with a dark, almost black varnish.  The effigy it depicts is not even remotely human; no human has that many tentacles or hideous, bat-like wings.  Whoever carved it must have had a very unhappy childhood.

appraise_text:
The creepy wooden carving is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: clear glass candle holder
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
Faceted clear glass, this holder is shaped like a blooming water lily. Large leaves sit at the base, while the petals of the lily reach up to enfold the candle in their embrace.  There is nothing on the clear glass candle holder.

appraise_text:
The clear glass candle holder is about three and a half feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of glass and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: pestle and mortar
weight: about five pounds
description:
Roughly hewn from stone, the mortar's bowl has been smoothed from long use.  The stone pestle used for grinding herbs within the bowl is smooth as well and hangs from a leather thong tied through a ring in the side of the bowl.

appraise_text:
The mortar and pestle is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of stone and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or eleven items.


item_name: poster of Klatch
weight: less than half a pound
description:
This poster contains a rough painting of the vast continent of Klatch, ranging from the Great Nef and Howondaland near the bottom to the Circle Sea on the turnwise side.  No cities have been marked, but you can make out mountain ranges, rivers and rainforests.  And deserts of course, lots of them.  A threatening-looking dragon has been painted on one side, but that's probably for decorative purposes.

appraise_text:
The poster of Klatch is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of paper and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Lancrastrian coat of arms stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  The Lancrastrian coat of arms.

appraise_text:
The Lancrastrian coat of arms stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: typewriter
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a device that allows people to put legible texts on paper quickly, even if their handwriting is terrible.  A series of keys display the letters of the alphabet.  When one is hit, a metal arm hits a small harassed looking imp, who is sitting in the centre of the device, on the head.  The imp then checks the position of the key and neatly prints the correct letter on the paper put into the device.

appraise_text:
The typewriter is about a foot and a half long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of iron.  It can hold less than one pound, one item, or less than a shot.


item_name: occult gold ring
appraise_text: It is made of gold and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 10 g
description:
This gold ring has been engraved with occult designs, such as mystic runes, stick-men wielding sticks and ferocious stick-bats, flying through the air propelled by the flapping of their stick-wings.


item_name: pink lily amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed in the blush pink of a baby's cheek, this amphora carries a creamy white painting of an opening lily.  A work of fine art, its handles are tall and arched to allow easy stacking, and its round ceramic stopper has been painted the same pink, and attached to the neck by a soft cream ribbon.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The pink lily amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: leather sofa
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This opulent sofa features a high back, heavily padded arms, and a deep seat that is perfect for relaxation.  It is covered with supple, black water buffalo hide.

appraise_text:
The leather sofa is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: kalamari
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This delicious starter is made up of rings of squid, tossed in a seasoned flour mixture and deep fried until golden brown.


item_name: leaf green amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed in a vibrant leaf green, this amphora carries a feathery yellow pattern of ferns.  A work of fine art, its handles are tall and arched to allow easy stacking, and its triangular stopper has been decorated with copper leaf, and attached to the neck by a long flexible plait of braided grass.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The leaf green amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: celadon green amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed in a rich celadon green, this amphora carries a penny-bright copper enamel painting of a trireme on the waves.  A work of fine art, its handles are tall and arched to allow easy stacking, and its triangular stopper has been decorated with a sailor's lucky knot, and attached to the neck by a long flexible plait of copper wire.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The celadon green amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: am daily [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a miniature version of the AM Daily, full of fun, facts and frolics.  It doesn't have an edition number on it but it does look authentic.

appraise_text:
The AM Daily is about four inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: Auriental heroic painting
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an Auriental drawing, done on rice paper.  It depicts two samurai with their katanas crossed.  At a wild guess, it looks like one of them tried a low upwards slash, and the other parried it.  Or something of the kind.

appraise_text:
The Auriental heroic painting is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small varnished luggage
description: This small chest is shuffling about at the back of the shop, waiting to be bought.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The small varnished luggage is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: marzipan and cherry dark chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a marzipan and cherry praline.  It is filled with sweet marzipan wrapping around a cherry.  A covering of dark chocolate, which is decorated with a swirl of white chocolate, completes the creation.  It looks delicious and is probably quite expensive.


item_name: porcelain Fang teacup
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a large pale pink and green patterned teacup from the Fang Dynasty.  Edged with gold around its lip and base, a chevron pattern extends down its sides.  Other than that, it's just an ordinary teacup, and rather ugly at that.  If you found it in an antique shop, you'd probably laugh at the number on its pricetag.

appraise_text:
The porcelain Fang teacup is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: cabbage scented candle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a short, square, candle, made with scented wax from Ankh-Morpork.  That probably goes a long way towards explaining the green colour of the wax, and the pleasant, cabbagey aroma.  Actually, it's not that pleasant.  It is not currently lit.  It looks as good as new.

appraise_text:
The cabbage scented candle is about four inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of wax and could be used as a weapon.


item_name: set of sturdy wooden bathroom cupboards
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a set of sturdy wooden bathroom cupboards, made from some wood that is pleasantly functional rather than decorative, though the overall effect is aethetically pleasing.  A smooth enamel basin is set into the top, with accompanying taps.

appraise_text:
The set of sturdy wooden bathroom cupboards is about seven and a half feet long and about six and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and enamel and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, about one hundred items, or about 5 gallons.


item_name: mess of worms
description: This is a mess of nice, earthy worms, suitable for fishing.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The mess of worms is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: cherry wood daybed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a curvacious cherry wood daybed, touched with accents of mother of pearl, its unfailingly straight perimeter railing dotted with enamel into eye-pleasing shapes.  Often placed in the studies of Agatean gentlemen, a noble would often spend many hours reclining on his daybed whilst writing poetry or meditating.  This particular daybed is stout and masculine with strangely sleek and curved legs.  Its strong lines lending way to a mattress which has been set into the frame and does not break the simple lines of its construction .

appraise_text:
The cherry wood daybed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: set of black walnut kitchen cupboards
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a set of kitchen cupboards made from black walnut wood.  Lacquered with a light gloss, the wood emits a slight reddish shine when the light catches it.  Two hinged doors hide the shelves that hide within, the design on the door being nothing more than a simple and elegantly carved rectangle of varying depths.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The set of black walnut kitchen cupboards is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: black trumpet
weight: about two pounds
description:
This trumpet is unusual in two ways: it is black and it has an extra tube in which a crossbow bolt could be loaded.  Among the more benign, musical keys, is another engraved with a skull and crossbone.  No doubt this is used to fire a bolt should an audience not applaud loudly enough.

appraise_text:
The black trumpet is about a foot and a half long and about six inches wide.  It is made of metal and could be used as a fired weapon.


item_name: pale green candle
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This candle is a lovely dappled pale green colour, like the leaves of an apple orchard.  It is not currently lit.  It is brand new.

appraise_text:
The pale green candle is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of beeswax and could be used as a weapon.


item_name: pet ball
appraise_text: The chewy green ball is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of rubber.
weight: less than a pound
description:
A large toy ball for pets, made out of some squishy, chewy material.  It's probably good for exercising their teeth, or something.


item_name: small chest of drawers
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a small chest of drawers that has been carefully crafted from oak.  Its square construction is sturdy and houses two drawers to hold various articles of clothing or other items.  The round drawer pulls have each been carved with the delicate oak leaves, the mark of the craftsman.  The drawers and frame could be painted or left as natural oak.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The small chest of drawers is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 50 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: iridescent [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of iridescent [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of iridescent [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: low bamboo table
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This table is made out of bamboo stems.  Its legs are about one and a half feet long, making it very awkward, if not impossible to sit at the table using chairs.  There is nothing on the low bamboo table.

appraise_text:
The low bamboo table is about four feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of bamboo and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 33 pounds, or fifteen items.


item_name: large piece of cigarette paper
description: This is a large piece of paper that you can use for rolling your own cigarettes.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The large piece of cigarette paper is about four inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: tasteful terracotta amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed in tasteful terracotta red, this amphora carries a subtle imprinting of minute triangles around the base and lip, highlighting the grace of the maker's touch.  A work of fine art, its handles are short and rounded to allow easy carrying. Its square stopper is made of pressed cork and is attached to the neck by a long piece of braiding yarn.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The tasteful terracotta amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: snowglobe
special_find_note: 056653d25781d2f1d75f8e920ab5520cb72f7bc9
description:
This beautiful snowglobe is one of Lord Hong's favourite art pieces and appeals to his orderly nature.  Its base is carved from a single piece of fluted jade and the orb itself is heavy enough to be pure crystal.  A small representation of Ankh-Morpork rests within the globe, details crafted by the most skilled artisan.  The only strange thing is the tiny flakes of snow inside don't seem to move.


item_name: Sunken Reef
weight: about a pound
description:
A huge cocktail glass.  The cocktail glass is almost completely full with seven ounces of light green cocktail with chunks of fruit floating in it.  It is almost completely full.

appraise_text:
The cocktail glass is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eight items, or about 1 gill.


item_name: Queen Ptraci mirror
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This large oval mirror is made in the Klatchian style known as Queen Ptraci, since the style became popular during her reign.  It has a beautifully ornate gold frame with spiral patterns encircling inlaid gems of amber, pearl, lapis lazuli and diamond.  It is too dark to see much in the room.

appraise_text:
The Queen Ptraci mirror is about three feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of gold and glass and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: black foldout futon
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This black mattressed futon is made of a pad of tufted cotton batting which is set in a minimal oaken frame.  The frame allows the futon to rest comfortably a few inches above the floor, its hard mattress a must for those craving a little punishment combined with a good night's sleep.  It looks comfortable and is the perfect thing to have if you are into the whole minimalistic trend for your home.  The futon has been folded out into a bed.

appraise_text:
The black foldout futon is about five and a half feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of oak and cotton and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: simple traditional white futon
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
As traditional as they get, this white futon has been set upon a simple white pine palette which lies inches from the ground.  The white mattress is made of cotton and has been stuffed with different types of seeds, which mould to any burden and make sleeping a comfortable affair.  Comfortable and practical, this futon makes any room seem a little more traditional.  The futon has been folded out into a bed.

appraise_text:
The simple traditional white futon is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: cheap wooden bookcase
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a plain wooden bookcase, made out of badly fitting planks.  It's rough and not very decorative but it offers plenty of space to put books.  There is nothing on the cheap wooden bookcase.

appraise_text:
The cheap wooden bookcase is about three feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 44 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: painting of peasants bringing in a harvest
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a colourful peasant painting, delightfully named 'Cutting Wheat'.  Nothing more than a few large blobs of yellow paint, some yellow and red blobs that can only be assumed to be people, and a few tall green blobs that look a little bit reminiscent of trees, this painting is certainly eclectic, and looks as though it was done by a four-year-old. 

appraise_text:
The painting of peasants bringing in a harvest is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: salamander attachment
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a cage hanging from the end of a long wooden stick.  The cage contains a fat and drowsing salamander with a small hammer poised precariously above its head.  A small button on the shaft of the stick looks like it would bring the hammer down on the salamander's head just hard enough to annoy it.

appraise_text:
The cage on a stick is about two and a half feet long and not very wide.  It is made of wood and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: mahogany four-poster bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a large four-poster bed, crafted from solid mahogany.  Each post is a single piece of timber carved in an elegant barley twist.  Carved panels join the posts together at the top and heavy red velvet drapes hang from them.  The canopy is also velvet and trimmed with gold braid at the edges.  It looks very romantic and very comfortable.

appraise_text:
The mahogany four-poster bed is about six feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of mahogany and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large lobster
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
A large, greenish-brown crustacean, the lobster is a delicious treat for even the most jaded of palettes.  The hefty forelimbs are chock full of flesh, while the long, segmented body goes down a treat with some melted butter.


item_name: loaded ten-sided die
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a die nicely carved from ivory with ten sides.  This die is special because a secret widget inside of the die can be set, enabling it to land on any side the roller chooses.  The widget is currently set to ten.

appraise_text:
The loaded ten-sided die is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: ladderback chair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This chair is made of pine that is painted a dark shade of red.  The back has horizontal slats from the seat to the top, hence its name.  The comfortable, square seat is made of woven rushes.

appraise_text:
The ladderback chair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pink hand-tied bridal bouquet
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a bouquet made of pink roses and carnations gathered up by the stems and then wrapped securely with pink ribbons forming a roughly circular top and an ideal place to clutch it by at the bottom.

appraise_text:
The pink hand-tied bridal bouquet is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of flowers and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: pearly [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of pearly [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of pearly [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: Star of the Aurient Tobacco
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a smart red leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  Fine gold stitching holds the pouch firmly together at the seams.  The red leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of Star of the Aurient tobacco.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The red leather pouch is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of leather and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or four items.


item_name: Spider Yum packet
weight: about half a pound
special_find_note: Loot from Queen Shelox
description:
This is a bright pink, rectangular packet with the words 'Spider Yum' and a small black tablet visible on each side.  The Spider Yum packet contains: six spider tablets.

appraise_text:
The Spider Yum packet is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is bright pink and is made of paper.  It can hold less than one pound, six items, or less than a shot.


item_name: marquetry sideboard
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a long table specifically designed to rest against a wall.  The marquetry effect on the top surface has been arranged to represent the Assassins' Guild coat of arms.   There is nothing on the marquetry sideboard.

appraise_text:
The marquetry sideboard is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 22 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: tier bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
A large bed, placed right on the ground, this tier bed is a very simple yet elegant construction.  The base, made from a large block of wood with long clean lines, and covered in a chocolate brown velvet material, sits square on the floor.  A smaller mattress has been positioned on top of it, giving the entire enterprise a tiered effect.  Festooned with chocolate brown pillows and covered with bedclothes that are tucked snugly at each corner, this bed begets traditional Auriental elegance at its foremost.

appraise_text:
The tier bed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Shou Shan stone wall plaque
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Portraying the balanced dark and light features that make the Agatean custom of Fung Shooey so popular, this piece is sure to bring harmony to your home.  The art work on the plaque is made of colorful Shou Shan stone.  The frame is inlaid with ornate cinnabar-red antique panels with gilt accent retrieved from old windows and doors.  Featuring a carved chinoiserie frame and small carvings of incense burners and other objects found around the house in its artwork, one cannot help but appreciate the originality such a piece brings to the home.

appraise_text:
The Shou Shan stone wall plaque is about three and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of stone and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: huge barrel
weight: about six hundred pounds
description:
This is an enormous barrel.  It looks like you could hide anything in it.  Actually it looks like you could even hide yourself in it.  It seems too heavy to simply carry around though... shame.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The huge barrel is about seven feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of wood and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 833 pounds, about three hundred and fifty items, or about 50 gallons.


item_name: moon dragon hourglass
weight: about three pounds
description:
This rather simple hourglass rests on a foundation cut in crude granite to maintain the impression of unimproved bedrock.  Curled around the top and centre half of the hourglass is a curious-looking moon dragon, sky blue with bright purple wings.  The sand trickles through the moon dragon hourglass, and it is now a quarter to two on Thursday the 8th of June.

appraise_text:
The moon dragon hourglass is about a foot and a half long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of granite and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Yellow gold of the bee hive
appraise_text: The small pale gold amphora is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of clay.
weight: less than a pound
description:
Fashioned from quality clay and glazed a delicate shade of pale gold, this small amphora has been carefully painted with silhouettes of competing athletes in white.  A classical Ephebian design, it is quite charming in a certain epicene way.  Its ears are tall and elegant, arching to a slightly pointy angle to allow easy stacking and handling.  The stopper is decorated with a simple, wavy black line and fastened to the amphora with a braided silk bond in pearly white.  It is almost full of wild honey perfume, which could be applied to someone.


item_name: cherry bookshelf
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a tall, cherry bookshelf.  It has three shelves in it to hold books or curios.  There is nothing on the cherry bookshelf.

appraise_text:
The cherry bookshelf is about four feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of cherrywood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: sage green amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay and glazed a deep shade of sage green with highlights in leaf green, this amphora has been painted with sylvan scenes complete with nymphs and satyrs in white.  A work of high quality, its handles are tall and arched to allow easy stacking and handling, and its round stopper has been decorated with a leaf green line and attached to the neck with a braided ribbon in fern green.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The sage green amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: prime lamb chop
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
A largish chop of tender lamb, grilled to an even brown on either side with garlic and olive oil.  It smells delicious.  It seems to have been pickled.


item_name: oily [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of oily [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of oily [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: small first aid kit
description:
This is a small wooden box for keeping bandages in.  Its cover has a glass window set into it, allowing anyone in need of a bandage to see how full it is.  To keep the bandages dry and clean, both the inside and the outside surfaces of the box have been lacquered and a thin strip of rubber has been laid down along the crack between its cover and its sides.  A vertical red cross, the symbol of Glaxos, the God of Medicine, is painted on the side.


item_name: black square bathtub
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a large, square shaped bathtub, about five feet long by five feet wide, and approximately two feet tall.  It appears to be made of fine black porcelain, giving it a very nice (and expensive) look, if a bit macabre for some people's taste.  It looks like the most comfortable way to use it would be to lie in it diagonally, and the corners are gently rounded off to fit this position nicely.  Or it could easily fit two, or maybe even three people sitting side by side along an edge.

appraise_text:
The black square bathtub is about five feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about sixty items, or about 52 gallons.


item_name: [adjective] [colour] Ramtop wolfhound
appraise_text: You appraise the aristocratic Ramtop wolfhound and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This large, full-coated dog looks suspiciously lupine.  Bred on the principle of Disguise, a pedigree Ramtop wolfhound would be able to pass for an exceptionally large wolf to almost any eyes.  Unfortunately most canines rely on their noses first, but it's the thought that counts.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.  His fur is silky and smooth.


item_name: set of jade dentures
special_find_note: 293caf737773302536c237701b1d5415f9670c37
description:
A simple set of dentures that have been made of a rare lavender jade.  Each tooth has been gently brought to the surface by the steady hand of a craftsman.  The top and bottom plates have been smoothed over making them gleam.  Some small lettering can be seen on the side of it that says "Gesukonote McSweeney was 'ere".


item_name: fluffy Gufnork figurine
description: This is a large and extremely fluffy Gufnork figurine.
weight: about ten pounds
appraise_text:
The fluffy Gufnork figurine is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: cat flap
description:
A square piece of balsa wood, to be attached to a similarly-shaped hole in a door to give easy access to cats without inviting the entire neighbourhood to borrow your stuff.

appraise_text:
The cat flap is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: antique mahogany chest
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This chest is made of mahogany, each of its surfaces decorated with intricate patterns.  Running around the bulk of this obviously antique piece of furniture are two stripes of brass and a matching set has been embedded in its lid.  On the front of the chest, the stripes converge around a small keyhole.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The antique mahogany chest is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 33 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: bedside cabinet
description: This is a small, mahogany bedside cabinet. It is open. It has one top drawer.
weight: about fifteen pounds
appraise_text:
The bedside cabinet is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of mahogany and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 22 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: water lily tapestry
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an intricately created tapestry, handwoven from dyed wool.  In the tradition of verdure tapestries, the design has a botanical theme: the panel is filled with white water lilies and dark green lilypads.

appraise_text:
The water lily tapestry is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: simple tatami mat bed
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Nothing more than a simple hand-woven rush grass mat with a black fabric border, this tatami mat bed is custom made for customers on a budget.  Made with three layers of firm, durable reeds, these traditional tatami have been used for centuries in tea houses and zen rooms and bedrooms to create an inviting and relaxing environment.

appraise_text:
The simple tatami mat bed is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: spindle-back pine chair
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This spindle-back chair is made from pine and would serve well either at the dining table or in a study.  The spindles that make up the back of the chair have been carved to form intertwined branches.  The back, seat and legs could be painted or left as natural pine.

appraise_text:
The spindle-back pine chair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: black silk cushion
weight: about a pound
description:
The shining, black silk cushion is edged with some pink lace on its seams.  It reminds of you of something, yet you can't quite put your finger on it.

appraise_text:
The black silk cushion is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of silk and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: leather corner sofa
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This is a large, L shaped sofa, intended to be placed in the corner of the room.  Its thick seat, back and arm rests are covered in soft brown leather, and filled with some very soft stuffing.

appraise_text:
The leather corner sofa is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large transparent pink bottle
description: This is a large transparent pink glass bottle. It is open.
weight: about a pound and a half
appraise_text:
The large transparent pink bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: wooden weapon rack
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This weapon rack is practical more than decorative, being made of wooden slats arranged into an open-fronted box into which the warrior with too many weapons can toss his or her spares.  There is nothing on the wooden weapon rack.

appraise_text:
The wooden weapon rack is about four feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 100 pounds, or ten items.


item_name: chart
description:
This well-used chart of the multiverse is very complicated, and you don't understand a single symbol on it.  The lines and things seem to change even as you look.  Better leave it alone.


item_name: dragon head meerschaum pipe
weight: about a pound
description:
Meerschaum is a creamy white mineral that comes from the sea where it floats ashore on the waves, and as it dries, becomes extremely hard and durable - or so the makers of pipes claim!  The craftsman who gave shape to this beautiful pipe aspired to create the visionary beauty of the head of a hissing noble dragon.  The bowl is shaped so that the smoke comes out from the figurine's mouth, leaving the eyes to glare furiously at whoever is sitting in front of the person smoking the pipe.  It has no tobacco in it.

appraise_text:
The dragon head meerschaum pipe is about six inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of stone and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: The sweet but spicy scent of cinnamon
appraise_text: The small sandy orange amphora is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of clay.
weight: less than a pound
description:
Fashioned from quality clay and glazed a delicate shade of sandy orange, this small amphora has been carefully painted with silhouettes of competing athletes in white.  A classical Ephebian design, it is quite charming in a certain epicene way.  Its ears are tall and elegant, arching to a slightly pointy angle to allow easy stacking and handling.  The stopper is decorated with a simple, wavy black line and fastened to the amphora with a braided silk bond in pearly white.  It is almost full of cinnamon perfume, which could be applied to someone.


item_name: vanilla cone
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is two scoops of rich, Quirmian vanilla ice cream in a sugared cone.  It has not yet begun to melt.


item_name: [colour] spaniel
appraise_text: You appraise the red spaniel and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
A sturdy dog with very long ears and melting eyes - in fact, everything about him gives the impression of melting.  Long, silky red fur trails down his neck and flanks, down over his well-feathered legs to muffle the soft paws.  Luscious velvet curls cover the backs of the drooping ears, which must be a right devil to keep burr-free.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.  His fur is silky and smooth.


item_name: pine bookshelf
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a tall, pine bookshelf.  It has three shelves in it to hold books or curios.  There is nothing on the pine bookshelf.

appraise_text:
The pine bookshelf is about four feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: colourful Claro Cliff dessert plate
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a well-made dessert plate, glazed in colourful shades.  It features a design of colourful pansies, painted in an attractive yet somewhat simplistic fashion.  A small CC monogram has been carefully signed on the reverse.  There is nothing on the colourful Claro Cliff dessert plate.

appraise_text:
The colourful Claro Cliff dessert plate is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pottery.  It can hold about 3 pounds.


item_name: oiled pine double bed
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a king-size double bed, around seven foot long by a whole five foot wide, with a one foot thick mattress.  The sides and the curved headboard are made of solid Hublandish pine planks, and the bedposts are five inch thick beams.  Every piece of wood is oiled to bring out the glow and striped texture.

appraise_text:
The oiled pine double bed is about seven feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of pine wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: tri-colour dragon vase
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
A symbol of vigilance and safe guard, the dragon is the most powerful creature in Agatean mythology.  This vase, however, is uniquely designed with the dragon's elongated neck as handles to fit its elegant shape.  Made in the Sung Tri-Colour style, the three distinct colours make this vase an exuberant piece of art.

appraise_text:
The tri-colour dragon vase is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or twelve items.


item_name: black coffee table
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a low table, with the top dyed graphite grey and lacquered.  It rests on a single metal foot in the centre, which splits into a cross shaped base.  It looks fancy and mildly macabre, but not particularly stable.  There is nothing on the black coffee table.

appraise_text:
The black coffee table is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: blue bolter cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This cabbage is blue-green with a small heart, but large outer leaves, very nervous and owing to some residual magical gene, prone to run away if startled.


item_name: country kitchen pantry
weight: about a hundred and fifty pounds
description:
The pantry is a tall cabinet with double doors.  It has been carefully handcrafted from oak with carved oak leaves, the mark of the craftsman, for door handles.  It has shelves on one side for bottles and jars of preserved fruits and vegetables, and behind the other door is a space tall enough to keep a mop and broom.  The pantry's doors and frame could be painted or left as naked oak.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The country kitchen pantry is about five and a half feet long and about three and a half feet wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: marble statue
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a lovingly carved statue of a nude man, imported from Ephebe, and standing about two feet high, the detailing in the muscles and the balance and proportion are astounding.  Right down to the fig leaf preserving the boundaries of common decency.

appraise_text:
The marble statue is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: gold ring
appraise_text: It is made of gold and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 10 g
description:
This is a very nice ring that has been lovingly crafted from gold.  It's engraved with leaf-patterns running around the outside.


item_name: painting of a sunset over Bes Pelargic
weight: about a pound
description:
This painting shows the outline of Bes Pelargic, seen from the inland.  Behind it, on the seaside, the sun is setting, bathing everything in shades of red-gold.

appraise_text:
The painting of a sunset over Bes Pelargic is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: bright yellow daffodil
description:
This bright and cheery flower has a long green stem and looks in good shape.  The flower is large, and it cheers you up immensely just looking at it.


item_name: large shiny luggage
description: This large chest is shuffling about at the back of the shop, waiting to be bought.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The large shiny luggage is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: [size] wizards' staff stencil
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny piece of cardboard, cut with a hole in the shape of a wizards' staff so it can be used as a stencil when painting.

appraise_text:
The tiny wizards' staff stencil is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of card and paper.


item_name: small block of jasmine incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have the aroma of jasmine.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of jasmine incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: bag of milk chocolate truffles
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small rectangular paper bag of a chic and tasteful, deep dark green.  Painted on it in suave gold letters is the word "Hayaryu's".  The spartan green bag contains:  ten milk chocolate truffles.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The spartan green bag is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: simple reliquary
weight: about a hundred and fifty pounds
description:
This is a simple table, made of smooth pine boards.  On top of it, there is a glass cabinet, meant to display one or more holy relics while protecting them from being touched.  There is nothing on the simple reliquary.

appraise_text:
The simple reliquary is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: lava lamp
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is an odd looking lamp, roughly the shape of an hourglass, with a brass base.  It is filled with murky pink liquid and large blobs of red goo that ooze this way and that.  The exact nature of the red goo is a mystery.  Some say it is a primitive type of troll that is still in its magma stage.  Others reckon it is something that got away from the Alchemists' Guild.  It gives off a faint light.

appraise_text:
The lava lamp is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: runic crescent wrench
weight: 3 3/9 lb
description:
Two feet long and forged from fine Gebra steel, this wrench is truly an Artificer's tool.  Along its length, runes inlaid in fine silver wire spell out a message for the initiated, and a constellation of silver stars around the crescent head twinkle in any available light, and perhaps in none at all.  The grip seems to shape itself to the wielder's hand, and the balance is light and wieldy.  There are eleven gleaming stars in the constellation.  An intricate network of slowly turning gears and cogwheels, formed from traceries of octarine light, surrounds the head and upper shaft. At its edge, the clockwork fades off into smaller and fainter mechanisms, but never quite disappears.

appraise_text:
The runic crescent wrench is about two feet long and about three inches wide.  It is made of klatchian steel and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: HungHungese screen
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a contemporary double-sided screen for the home.  Framed in a light spruce, the panels of the screen have been included in the main construction of the frame and form a checkerboard pattern across its length.  Inside the checkerboard are long panels of cotton that have depictions of life in a hectic HungHung market.  There are several ducks, a few sheep, some dried fish and a lot of people that look like they are shouting at one another.

appraise_text:
The HungHungese screen is about six feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of paper and wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pointy hat bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This large bed is made of polished ebony with bats and other occult icons carved into the head and foot boards.  At each corner of the bed, there is a tall post topped by a small, pointy black hat.  This bed is definitely suited for a witch, albeit a modern one.

appraise_text:
The pointy hat bed is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [colour] chaise-longue
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Graceful, sinuous lines and a curving half back make this refined chaise the perfect choice for anyone inclined towards lounging in a picturesque way.  Smooth, glossy [colour] silk covers the chaise and matching pillow invitingly, while the whole is supported by four elegantly arched feet carved with classical scrollwork.

appraise_text:
The [colour] chaise-longue is about seven and a half feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and silk and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: veggie roll
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a veggie roll for those weird people who don't eat meat.  It contains rice and carrots rolled up in kelp.


item_name: cabbage flavoured cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This looks suspiciously like a cabbage.  It smells like a cabbage, moves like a cabbage and, as strange as it seems, probably is a real cabbage.


item_name: set of prayer beads [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a replica set of prayer beads.  It has been crafted using wood and some excellent paintwork.  There is a small strap on it.

appraise_text:
Some prayer beads is about four inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of wood.


item_name: bottle of Ephebian white wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large clear glass bottle.  The large clear bottle is completely full with one pint of Ephebian white wine.  It is completely full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large clear bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: Pink Tickle
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of Pink Tickle, about one stalk.  Common Pink Tickle is an obscure member of the Dianthus family, loosely resembling a carnation with soft, fluffy leaves.  Native to the highly magical Ramtop mountains, the Pink Tickle glows a faint octarine every Thursday in Grune.


item_name: Ankh fine blended tobacco
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small brown leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  The stitching at the seams is slightly ragged.  The brown leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of Ankh fine blended tobacco.  It is open.


item_name: colourful Claro Cliff coffee mug
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a well-made coffee mug, glazed in colourful shades.  On it is glazed a depiction of a butterfly, which despite being somewhat simplistic is still eye pleasing.  A small CC monogram has been carefully signed on the reverse.

appraise_text:
The colourful Claro Cliff coffee mug is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of pottery and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: World Peace Book
appraise_text: The closed World Peace Book is not very long and not very wide. It is made of paper.
weight: less than a pound
description:
The nice, calming, blue-coloured cover of this book features a very large-scale picture of a bologna.  It is closed.


item_name: Congratulations banner
description: This is a narrow white banner.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The Congratulations banner is about three feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of cotton and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [colour] brocade sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Comfort itself is idealised in this sofa.  Well-padded curving arms surround large tasselled cushions that look perfect for sinking into.  The low, straight back is also overstuffed, lending itself well to anyone with a penchant for simply sprawling about.  It is covered entirely in soft, warm brocade like a meadow in summer, patterned with a profusion of flowers and grasses, and practically begs to be lounged upon.

appraise_text:
The wildflower brocade sofa is about seven and a half feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: inlaid teak wardrobe
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a large rectangular teak wardrobe.  The sides, base and back are all brown panels, however the two front doors have had intricate designs inlaid on their panels in a variety of sombre semi-precious stones.  In total there are eight different scenes, each painted on a different panel, the top panels depicting the four seasons whilst the lower four panels filled with blossoming flowers.  Placed on a rich chocolate brown background, the mother of pearl and ivory gleam in even the slightest light.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The inlaid teak wardrobe is about five and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: several sesame chicken wings
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
These are sesame chicken wings.  They are chicken wings covered with a crushed black bean and soy sauce, then after being lightly stir fried, they are covered with sesame seeds, hence the name.


item_name: simple redwood sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This comfortable sofa exudes homeliness and softness.  The curves of its polished redwood frame are almost hidden under the deep leather upholstery that covers it, which in turn is half-covered by a loosely spun creamy throw rug.

appraise_text:
The simple redwood sofa is about seventeen and a half feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: painting of a young woman playing the recorder
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a traditional Auriental painting of a young woman sitting on her knees playing a reed recorder.  Behind her are several tall bamboo shoots, which contrast the livelier colours in her kimono.  The background has been done in a simple whitewash that covers most of the screen. 

appraise_text:
The painting of a young woman playing the recorder is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: bag of [flavour] flavoured Djeli beans
weight: less than a pound
description:
This bag is made from white, slightly-waxed paper.  While hardly the most durable of containers, it does at least appear to be strong enough to safely hold a number of small items.  The paper bag is about half full with ten mystery flavoured Djeli beans.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The paper bag is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 4 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: bronze arrowhead
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small leaf-shaped arrowhead, made from bronze, slightly blunted by time.  It has been dedicated hopefully to Ph'emina, and is intended to promote beauty of the nose.

appraise_text:
The bronze arrowhead is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of bronze.


item_name: strange wooden carving
weight: about a pound
description:
This wooden carving has a strange, wavy quality.  The shape is decidedly odd: it's like a cloud that can one moment appear to resemble an old lady's profile, and the next be the spitting image of a deformed rabbit.

appraise_text:
The strange wooden carving is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: two-headed coin
appraise_text: The shiny brass coin is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of brass.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a coin made from what looks like brass.  However, unlike normal coins it is worthless, as it shows the Patrician's head on both the reverse and obverse.


item_name: standing only ticket
description: This is a small ticket of brown cardboard.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The small brown ticket is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: shot glass of dark rum
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nicely made shot glass, of the sort usually used to serve spirit measures in pubs and restaurants.  The shot glass of dark rum is about half full with three teaspoons of dark rum.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The shot glass of dark rum is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: bright yellow amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed in a glaringly bright yellow, this amphora carries an eye-searing red pattern of squiggles and crosshatches.  Though the vase is a work of fine art, its ears tall and arched to allow easy stacking, the painting indicates that it is likely meant to attract the eye of more primitive traders to the city, rather than local persons of taste and vision.  Its triangular stopper has been decorated with a bright blue splash of paint, and attached to the neck by a plait of cheap but brilliantly dyed threads.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The bright yellow amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: packet of five quilting blocks
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a medium pale blue packet, rather like an envelope, of thick paper that has been waxed to make it more resilient.  The medium pale blue waxed paper packet is completely full with a grey silk quilting block, a rich red silk quilting block, a chocolate brown silk quilting block, a tan silk quilting block and a light lavender silk quilting block.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The medium pale blue waxed paper packet is about six inches long and about four inches wide.  It is pale blue and is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, or eight items.


item_name: blue-grey wooden chair
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a plain chair made out of sturdy blue-grey wood.  It's not very decorative, but it will last for some time, and stand around in an unassuming way in the kitchen.

appraise_text:
The blue-grey wooden chair is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: hunting knife
weight: 2 lb
description:
The handle of this knife is crafted from a hardwood and has grooves for easy gripping.  Leading up to the blade is a polished steel guard designed to keep the user's hand from sliding toward the blade after a deep incision.  The blade itself is horribly sharp and serrated on the lower portion of the blade leading up to a slightly curved point and a sharpened back edge.  This knife looks well suited to a lifetime of skinning animals or an hour in Ankh-Morpork.

appraise_text:
The hunting knife is about nine inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type dagger.


item_name: bag of black olives
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a little brown paper bag capable of holding a lot of very small things.  It has been decorated with an ever typical simple Ephebian wave pattern.  The little paper bag is about half full with ten black olives.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The little paper bag is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, or about twenty items.


item_name: traditional painting of two women singing
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a traditional Auriental painting of two women in formal kimonos sitting under a konara oak tree.  One of the women is plucking the strings of a lute-like instrument, while the other has her mouth open in song, her hand, clutching a fan, pointed skywards.

appraise_text:
The traditional painting of two women singing is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: oil painting
description: This is a beautiful oil painting of three dogs playing poker.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The oil painting is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small red conch
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a small red conch shell.  It's a very nice conch, though.  You definitely haven't seen many better conch shells than this.  It's a premium quality conch.  Can you tell I'm rambling?

appraise_text:
The small red conch is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: odd shellfish
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
A spiral shell, with spiny tentacles protruding from it, it is (in theory) edible, but in practice, probably tastes as appetising as it looks.


item_name: dummy doll
weight: less than a pound
description:
This little straw doll is a miniature training dummy.  It is dressed in rags, has two arms that can spin around and is designed to look pretty worn.

appraise_text:
The dummy doll is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of straw.


item_name: emerald green dupioni bodice
description:
This is a emerald green low-cut bodice cut in a skin-tight merchant style.  It is made of the finest thin, enforced dupioni and trimmed with topaz jewels.  It has ivory buttons that have "NL" engraved on them.


item_name: ice bucket
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This metal bucket was designed for a purpose, and looks like it would fit a champagne bottle perfectly.  The ice bucket is almost empty except for a small champagne bottle.  It is almost empty.

appraise_text:
The ice bucket is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of metal and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 6 pounds, about sixty items, or about 2 quarts.


item_name: small block of patchouli incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have the aroma of patchouli.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of patchouli incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: rustic oak bookshelf
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This rustic bookshelf has been carefully constructed from oak.  It has three shelves to hold a variety of cook books, story books, how-to books and other items that seem to sit around and gather dust.  Each shelf has a large detailed oak leaf, the trademark of the craftsman, carved on it.  The frame and shelves of the bookshelf could be painted or otherwise decorated.  There is nothing on the rustic oak bookshelf.

appraise_text:
The rustic oak bookshelf is about three feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 50 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: large pine table
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a large and sturdy looking table, made of massive Hublandish pine planks and beams.  The top is an inch thick, while the legs and the beams connecting them are easily two inches thick.  Every surface is oiled, to bring out the glow and the striped texture.  There is nothing on the large pine table.

appraise_text:
The large pine table is about six feet long and about four feet wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 33 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: bottle of the Duke of Sto Helit's Finest White Wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large cabbage green glass bottle.  This is a vintage bottle of Sto Plains white wine.  It is a sparkling white wine made of cabbage.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The large cabbage green bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: paduak coffee table
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a very simple, plain coffee table made of exotic paduak wood.  The wood is dark with brilliant stripes of orange and gold in the grain. The table has been rubbed to a soft shine.  There is nothing on the paduak coffee table.

appraise_text:
The paduak coffee table is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 5 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: spring pouncer cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
The tightly packed outer leaves of this cabbage have a habit of unfurling when it is picked.  This releases the inner leaves, which are razor sharp.  A good heater, but wear chain mail gloves when picking.


item_name: bottle of daffodil perfume
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a perfume bottle made out of yellow crystal.  It is almost full of daffodil perfume which can be sprayed onto someone.

appraise_text:
The yellow perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: bag of mixed chocolate truffles
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small rectangular paper bag of a chic and tasteful, deep dark green.  Painted on it in suave gold letters is the word "Hayaryu's".  The spartan green bag contains:  six white chocolate truffles, two dark chocolate truffles and two milk chocolate truffles.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The spartan green bag is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: cured cod
description:
A long, but narrow, fish, with silver-grey scales and what appears to be a tiny beard growing beneath its fishy lips.


item_name: simple rosewood sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This comfortable sofa exudes homeliness and softness.  The curves of its polished rosewood frame are almost hidden under the deep leather upholstery that covers it, which in turn is half-covered by a loosely spun creamy throw rug.

appraise_text:
The simple rosewood sofa is about seventeen and a half feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: transparent lavender perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny bottle of scent.  It has a tiny label on it with a picture of some lavender.  You could probably spray it on and find yourself gorgeous to the casual observer.

appraise_text:
The transparent lavender perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: banana [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny replica banana, lovingly carved from wood and coated in lurid yellow paint.  There is a small strap on it.

appraise_text:
The yellow banana is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of wood and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: magic hand mirror
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a small hand mirror with a cracked wooden frame.  The surface seems cracked and chipped, but the way it shimmers makes it hard to tell for sure.  The way occasional images appear in the glass gives the impression that the mirror lacks depth only in mundane dimensions.

appraise_text:
The cracked hand mirror is about a foot and a half long and about a foot wide.  It is made of wood and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: nougat and orange dark chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
A bite sized piece of soft nougat made from the finest honey and candied oranges hand dipped in dark chocolate and decorated with a little squiggle of orange peel.  It looks delicious and is probably quite expensive.


item_name: fennel seed
description: This appears to be a small, black, fennel seed.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
A fennel seed is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: sapphire blue amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed a deep sapphire blue with yellow bursts to represent sunlight, this amphora carries an onyx-black silhouette of two men, one winged, and one falling.  Black feathers form a pattern around the base of the amphora.  A work of fine art, its handles are tall and arched to allow easy stacking, and its triangular stopper has been decorated with a simplistic sun in yellow, and attached to the neck on a yellow braided ribbon.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The sapphire blue amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: herringbone canopy bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a stunning canopy bed, simply assembled with a diagonal herringbone lattice that runs along its canopy, headboard and footboard.  Four curved feet support the rose oak structure, while fluffy white pillows and a crisp white duvet have been laid out carefully on the mattress.

appraise_text:
The herringbone canopy bed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pine coffin
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a rather common and inexpensive pine coffin; however, it is very well made.  It has no pillow in it, though it has a rather nice pink cotton interior.  You could probably heft a corpse into this coffin.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The pine coffin is about eight and a half feet long and about four and a half feet wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 333 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: ornamental rudis pendant
description:
This is a small wooden pendant based on the rudis given to the ancient gladiators of the arena.  Thin symbols and patterns have been delicately carved into the blade and handle, representing its significance to Reebox, the Ephebian Goddess of Victory.


item_name: barrel of Demestica red wine
weight: about six hundred pounds
description:
This is a large, sturdy oak barrel, the sort used for storing wine since wine-making began.  The oak barrel is completely full with many gallons of Demestica red wine.  It is completely full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The oak barrel is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 833 pounds, about three hundred and fifty items, or about 60 gallons.


item_name: greyed timber bookcase
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a plain bookcase made out of greyed timber planks, unpolished.  It's not very decorative, but it will last for some time, and stand around in an unassuming way in the room.  There is nothing on the greyed timber bookcase.

appraise_text:
The greyed timber bookcase is about three and a half feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 44 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: silver alligator brooch
appraise_text: It is made of silver and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 7/9 lb
description:
This is a silver brooch fashioned into a representation of an alligator.  The alligator has its jaw open, but the representation is a little comical; as sanitised from the real life article as it is possible to be without actually inventing a whole new animal.


item_name: bottle of Fine Quirmian Red Wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large red glass bottle.  This is a vintage bottle of Quirmian Red wine, it looks very expensive; it is probably only possible to buy this from the most exclusive of shops.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The large red bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: bottle of exotic ylang ylang perfume
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a perfume bottle made out of purple crystal.  It is almost full of ylang ylang perfume which can be sprayed onto someone.

appraise_text:
The purple perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: tsimo costume
special_find_note: a4a93b269a40e4b3ea721d61580553c7be44c6ea
description:
The Tsimo costume is a thickly-padded cotton suit that covers the whole body.  It is dyed a shade of pink that looks vaguely skin coloured, at least from a distance.  It is supposed to make the wearer look around three times their normal size (or in the case of most wizards, like they've been on a diet).  A replica of a Tsimo loincloth has been stitched onto the suit.


item_name: country kitchen chair
weight: about ten pounds
description:
A ladder-back kitchen chair that has been lovingly carved from oak.  The posts that support the ladder-back slats have been beautifully carved with the craftsman's mark of scrolling oak leaves.  Its slats, legs, and contoured seat could be painted or left as natural oak.

appraise_text:
The country kitchen chair is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Queen Ptraci armchair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a padded armchair in the Klatchian style known as Queen Ptraci since the style became popular during her reign.

appraise_text:
The Queen Ptraci armchair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: order of pork balls with warm sauce
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a nicely lacquered black octagonal plate, the sort usually used to serve meals in restaurants.  You could probably eat from it, if it contained food.  On the black octagonal plate is an order of pork balls with warm sauce.

appraise_text:
The black octagonal plate is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pottery.  It can hold about 5 pounds.


item_name: unfinished bear [build-a-bear]
description: This is a toy bear, or at least it will be when it's completed.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The unfinished toy bear is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of fur and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: cloisonne pot
weight: about seven pounds
description:
Exuberant in gold, only cloisonne can achieve this brilliant effect.  Each colour is separated by the metal wire, repeatedly filled in with enamel and then fired, ensuring that the making of cloisonne is a painstaking process.  This particular vase has been filled with blues, greens, warm golds and browns and the end effect is a pattern of lotus flowers, blossoms and leaves broken up by a wreath of gold rings.  With its finished interior, this cloisonne pot can also be used for keeping small items.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The cloisonne pot is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of clay and enamel and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or twelve items.


item_name: print of Bowl of Fruit
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a print of Desmond Darley's Bowl of Fruit.  It features a white porcelain bowl sitting on a table covered with a blue tablecloth.  In the bowl is an orange, two red apples, a bunch of grapes and a plum.

appraise_text:
The print of Bowl of Fruit is about a foot and a half long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small block of rocky incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block appears to nothing more than a bar of grey stone.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of rocky incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: lampstand
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
No well dressed room should be without a lampstand carved from the finest sapient pearwood.  Sadly, this is made from cheap pine, and serves no useful purpose.  The shade on the top is broken and torn.

appraise_text:
The lampstand is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: lump
description: This is a lump of stuff. It smells faintly of oil.
appraise_text:
The lump is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: small block of ginseng-scented incense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This small block of incense has been carefully treated and scented so that when it burns, it will have the aroma of ginseng.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of ginseng-scented incense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: barrel of retsina
weight: about six hundred pounds
description:
This is a large, sturdy oak barrel, the sort used for storing wine since wine-making began.  The oak barrel is completely full with many gallons of ephebian retsina.  It is completely full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The oak barrel is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 833 pounds, about three hundred and fifty items, or about 60 gallons.


item_name: yellow umbrella [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a replica of an umbrella, not just any kind of umbrella but a yellow one!  Clearly this is the best kind of umbrella.

appraise_text:
The yellow umbrella is about three inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of leather and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: cabbage roll
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
With the new flux of Ankh-Morpork citizens entering Bes Pelargic, the chef thought it might be wise to include something somewhat familiar in his menu.  This is the same as a salmon roll, but it is wrapped in cabbage instead of kelp.


item_name: large pine coffin
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This rather inexpensive coffin is made of pine.  It has a nice floral cotton interior.  This is the kind of box to send your poorer friends or enemies to their rest in.  You could probably heft a corpse into this coffin.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large pine coffin is about eight and a half feet long and about four and a half feet wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 666 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: nightingale's nest
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
Delicious noodles made from flour and eggs, steamed and fried.  They are mixed with small pieces of meat and vegetables.


item_name: curved sword
weight: 8 8/9 lb
description:
A heavy, single edged sword of good Klatchian steel.  This would cost both owner and opponent an arm and a leg, in different senses, of course.

appraise_text:
The curved sword is about five feet long and about four inches wide.  It is made of klatchian steel and could be used as a weapon of type heavy-sword.


item_name: [colour] tsortean cat
appraise_text: You appraise the dark brown tsortean cat and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
A fine, athletic-looking cat with a sleek and slightly wild appearance, the most striking feature of this sumptuous animal is her glistening mahogany-toned glossy brown coat.  Smooth, lustrous and close-lying, it has something of the feel of luxurious mink.  Large, round eyes, strikingly green, and an unusually slim face give assurance of this feline's top Tsortean pedigree.  She is in good shape.  She is standing.


item_name: iconograph album
appraise_text: The closed iconograph album is about a foot long and about nine inches wide. It is made of paper.
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a handsome, leatherbound album to store memories in physical form.  All the pages have three little boxes drawn on them, to glue iconographs in.  It is closed.


item_name: Seaweed Surprise
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is seaweed surprise.  Surprise!  It's seaweed, but not just any seaweed.  This is some of the finest weed, gathered from the coastal shores of Bes Pelargic.  The weed is a deep red colour with a few patches of green and has been arranged tastefully on a bed of steaming white rice.  Dark sauce covers the seaweed and is starting to soak into the rice.


item_name: cloisonne bowl
weight: about four pounds
description:
The making of cloisonne is a painstaking process.  Each colour is separated by the metal wire and then repeatedly filled in with enamel and fired, and then finished with touches of gold.  With flower designs on both exterior and interior, this low cloisonne pot suits perfectly for a coffee table display, especially when holding a small quantity of potpourri.

appraise_text:
The cloisonne bowl is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of clay and enamel and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or twelve items.


item_name: small needle [build-a-bear]
description: This is a small, pointy silver needle. It could probably be used to mend clothes.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The small silver needle is roughly a couple of inches long and not very wide.  It is made of silver and could be used as a weapon of type misc.


item_name: [colour] hergen cat
appraise_text: You appraise the calico hergen cat and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
A large, placid-looking cat, whose main characteristic is her stump of a tail.  The long, silk hair that covers the rest of her body fans out over the tail stub, giving it a pompom effect.  Her long, silky fur is a pure glistening white, with dramatic patches of deep black and red scattered across her flanks and bobtail.  Curious little tufts of hair tip her ears, and her chin is adorned with a matching goatee.  She is in good shape.  She is standing.


item_name: sparkly [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of sparkly [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of sparkly [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: wearable cabbage
appraise_text: You appraise the petite green cabbage and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about four pounds
description:
This small bundle of green leaves is possibly the cutest little vegetable in existence.  Every one of its trim cabbage fronds is perfectly layered over its neighbour, and its outside leaves curl protectively over its lighter green heart to give it a prim, yet winsome expression.  It is perfectly sized to sit on a proud owner's shoulder, and all in all the epitome of a charming little cabbage.  It is in good shape.  It is standing.


item_name: silver crane wall fan
weight: about four pounds
description:
Measuring almost thirty five inches in height, when open this fan expands to four and a half feet in width and makes a stunning wall display for the home.  Beautifully handpainted in Sum Dim and handcrafted in nearly translucent rice paper with mahogany stained bamboo ribs, the fan is a brilliant silver with scenes of pine trees and cranes.

appraise_text:
The silver crane wall fan is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: sleepy moon dragon candle holder
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
This statuette depicts a moon dragon, curled into a tight little ball with its eyes closed.  In a cruel kind of utility, there is a sculpted hollow on the middle of its back, where a candle can be placed.  Every scale on the dragon's body is individually detailed and the skill of the sculptor is such that such that you can almost see its pewter sides breathing.  There is nothing on the sleepy moon dragon candle holder.

appraise_text:
The sleepy moon dragon candle holder is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pewter and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold less than one pound, or one item.


item_name: transparent orange perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny bottle of scent.  It has a tiny label on it with a picture of some oranges.  You could probably spray it on and find yourself gorgeous to the casual observer.

appraise_text:
The transparent orange perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: Bes Pelargic Atlas
weight: about three pounds
description:
Published by the Bes Pelargic board of tourism, the Bes Pelargic atlas details the various shops, restaurants and services around the city.  Each page contains different listings, categorised in a manner that made sense at the time, and a map of the city which shows their locations.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed Bes Pelargic atlas is about a foot long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: glass tumbler of orange juice
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a short glass tumbler, of the sort usually found in pubs and restaurants.  The glass tumbler of orange juice is completely full with one cup of orange juice.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The glass tumbler of orange juice is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: large glowing octagon stick-on applique
weight: about half a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  A large glowing octagon.

appraise_text:
The large glowing octagon stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: simple redwood desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This desk is little more than a heavy table with straight, unadorned wooden legs and a solid redwood top.  Beyond the little circle recessed into one corner to hold an inkwell, it could just as well be a small kitchen table as a writing desk.  There is nothing on the simple redwood desk.

appraise_text:
The simple redwood desk is about five feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: linzerauge
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
Two round cookies attached together with strawberry jam.  One of the cookies has three little holes in it.


item_name: cabbage bun
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small golden bun with little speckles of green creating a decorative if erratic pattern on its surface.  Closer inspection reveals that is quite like a raisin bun, only the raisins have been replaced with little bits of cabbage.  It is probably very healthy.


item_name: satiny [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of satiny [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of satiny [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: black clarinet
weight: about half a pound
description:
This is an elegant clarinet made from brushed wood.  It has silver-plated keys, a smooth and balanced mechanism, silver pads, and a natural cork.  The wood has been brushed with a black varnish that still allows the natural beauty of the wood to shine through.  Running behind the reed is a long tube that extends all the way down the instrument, about the width of a dart.  It seems that anyone playing this clarinet could also propel a projectile forward at the same time.

appraise_text:
The black clarinet is about a foot and a half long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be used as a fired weapon.


item_name: bottle of festival strength mead
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a medium sized elegant dark green glass bottle.  It is tall and thin, and square in cross-section.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The medium sized elegant dark green bottle is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: tiny pipette
weight: less than half a pound
description:
From the looks of it, this piece of glassware was meant to be a long straw, the bulge in the middle suggesting that the glassblower coughed at a bad time.  In fact, it is used by alchemists both to measure and separate liquids from other liquids and is operated by a sophisticated mechinism: a mouth applied to the top opening engaged in some cautious sucking.

appraise_text:
The tiny pipette is about six inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, six items, or less than a shot.


item_name: book of cat haikus
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a cheerful-looking little book with a picture of a comical cat on the cover.  As in all Agatean books, page 1 is at the back.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed book of cat haikus is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: plump sofa
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
The upholstery of this sofa is plumped up with soft feathers and covered with a thick beige linen.  The armrests and frame are made from pine which could be painted.

appraise_text:
The plump sofa is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: bottle of bite cure
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large purple glass bottle.  The large purple bottle is about half full with two cups of thick purple liquid.  It is about half full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large purple bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: white rosewood sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a rather old sofa, carved from fine-grained rosewood and cushioned with faded red pillows.  The back curves upwards to a mildly battered scrollwork top, matching the curl of the carved armrests.  It has been painted a creamy white, with curving, feathered brush strokes.

appraise_text:
The white rosewood sofa is about seventeen and a half feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: strange angler fish
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
special_find_note: 897b0d1f007bb31c3a43385b4ac4663fb9865f9a
description:
This is a strange, blackish-brown coloured angler fish.  It has small dangly protrusion thingies on its head.  All in all, it seems very peculiar, and its possible uses are obscure and secret to most normal people.


item_name: some wormwood
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of wormwood, about one stalk.  A tall firm stalk with large, whitish leaves and nearly globular green-yellow flowers.


item_name: meerschaum ashtray with a Morporkian motif
weight: less than a pound
description:
As meerschaum is a creamy white mineral that comes from the sea where it floats ashore on the waves - or so the carvers of meerschaum claim!  When meerschaum dries, it becomes extremely hard and durable.  When the craftsman gave shape to the stone in his skilled hands, he aspired to create the visionary beauty of a ring of Morporkian thieves dancing around a sad looking merchant, pointing and laughing at his distress.  There is nothing on the meerschaum ashtray with a Morporkian motif.

appraise_text:
The meerschaum ashtray with a Morporkian motif is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of stone.  It can hold less than one pound.


item_name: antique grandfather clock
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a grandfather clock made out of oak.  The colouring of the wood suggests that it has been a long time since it was a tree, and the rather old-fashioned design of the clock goes to strengthen this impression.  Swinging slowly around in the open casing is a long pendulum made of brass, the same material which the clock's hands consist of.  Currently they show that it is a quarter past three.

appraise_text:
The antique grandfather clock is about six feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [colour] archangel cat
appraise_text: You appraise the silvery archangel cat and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
Legend has it that Uberwaldean trappers used to take the ancestors of this ghost-like cat for their plush double coats, selling them as top-quality beaver or seal skin.  Her short, dense coat is a soft smoky blue-grey colour, each hair tipped with silver, giving her a mysterious silvery sheen.  Her mild, half-shy eyes are large and round, a soft grey-green in shade, wondering at the world.  She is in good shape.  She is standing.


item_name: piece of red paper
appraise_text: The piece of red paper is about a foot long and about nine inches wide. It is made of paper.
weight: about a pound
description:
This paper has been dyed a very significant and lucky shade of red.  A powerful anti-demon incantation has been carefully inked onto it, which will obviously terrify any demon reading it right out of your home (presuming the demon who has come to call can actually read, of course).


item_name: pair of crossed staves stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  A pair of crossed staves.

appraise_text:
The pair of crossed staves stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: formal black silk kimono
description:
The quality of this formal black kimono is unreputed.  This five-crested kimono is completely lined in black ivory silk which shimmers slightly under light.  The crests are crossed hawk feathers delicately embroidered and painted onto the silk in rich hues of gold, orange, red and white.


item_name: some sumac
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of powdered dark scarlet sumac, about four pinches.  Sumac is a spice with a tart, lemony taste.


item_name: black marble bag
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small black bag for holding marbles, complete with a draw string.  It is filled with coloured marbles.  Perhaps you could give it to someone who has lost theirs.  The black marble bag is completely full with [10 random marbles].  It is open.

appraise_text:
The black marble bag is about four inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of plush and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, or ten items.


item_name: Ankh-Morporkian coat of arms stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  The Ankh-Morporkian coat of arms.

appraise_text:
The Ankh-Morporkian coat of arms stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: steel dory
weight: 4 4/9 lb
description:
This is an updated version of the older iron Ephebian hoplite spear.  Its head has been forged out of steel and sharpened to a wicked point.  Normally wielded in one hand while the other blocks blows with a shield, the shaft is formed out of hardened, polished ash and has a bronze shoe at the bottom end to balance it.

appraise_text:
The steel dory is about six and a half feet long and about three inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type polearm.


item_name: sugar cube [build-a-bear]
appraise_text: The sugar cube is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of wood.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a replica of a sugar cube.  It has been crafted using wood and some excellent paintwork.  There is a small strap on it.


item_name: plain pine bed
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
A plain pine bed with a soft feather mattress.  The frame and headboard could be painted or left untouched for the natural pine look.  There is nothing on the plain pine bed.

appraise_text:
The plain pine bed is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 10 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: farmer salt shaker
weight: less than a pound
special_find_note: 1ed9614e3a58eba9b63ebce789078e0caebaea64
description:
This salt shaker is creatively made in the shape of a simple farmer.  Little holes in his straw hat allow salt to be shaken out of the bloke onto the food or otherwise of your choice.


item_name: dozen red roses
description:
Ideal as a gift for your chosen partner, these beautiful red roses both look and smell divine.  They are kept together by a large pink bow from which hangs a discreet tag for a message to be scribed onto.


item_name: bottle of fine white Ephebian Wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large clear glass bottle.  The large clear bottle is about three-quarters full with some white wine.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large clear bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: bunch of beautiful roses
description:
This is a large and impressive bouquet of some of the most beautiful roses in existence.  They vary in colour from the deepest red to snow white, each one having been picked at the height of its bloom.  They would be perfect to give to a much loved partner.


item_name: print of Chariots of Fire
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a print of Helipodius' Chariots of Fire.  It features a large two wheeled chariot, devoid of any horse-drawn power rolling quite quickly down a steep incline.  The entire rear end of the vehicle is completely engulfed in bright orange flames, leaving a long smoke trail behind.  A single stalwart figure stands upon the chariot clutching his hat worriedly.

appraise_text:
The print of Chariots of Fire is about two feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: seagull marble bench
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This small bench has been cut from shining white marble and decorated with a pattern of seagulls in flight carved into the stone by a gentle hand. It looks quite comfortable.

appraise_text:
The seagull marble bench is about ten feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of marble and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: membership pass
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a simple rectangle of card with an alligator clip at the back, suitable for attaching to clothing, or in extreme cases, a spare nipple.  It has a name and an expiry date written on its face.

appraise_text:
The membership pass is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be worn as armour.


item_name: large oak wardrobe
weight: about a hundred and fifty pounds
description:
This oak wardrobe is large enough to hold both winter and summer clothing for an entire family, if necessary.  Its door handles are carved with delicate oak leaves - the mark of the craftsman.  The doors and frame could be painted to suit any decor.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large oak wardrobe is about three feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 77 pounds, or about one hundred and ten items.


item_name: tuppenny upright
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
It is a doughnut, famed and worshipped by policemen all over the Multiverse.  It is filled with some sort of reddish jam.  This one also makes policemen chuckle, for its name also means something a bit... rude...


item_name: [type/gender/guild] mannequin
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is an exquisite mannequin, designed for displaying the most elegant and tasteful clothes and armour on.  [Adjective], it has been made to look like [type], and it would make an impressive addition to any room.  It is of much better quality and its design is much more detailed than your average dummy.  [She/He] is standing.  There is nothing on the [type] mannequin.

appraise_text:
The [type] mannequin is about five and a half feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 111 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: wrought iron bedstead
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This mammoth Patrician-size four-poster canopy bedstead is made of artfully wrought iron.  The posters have been crafted with delicate vines and flowers crawling up them, arching overhead to form a hollow canopy in the shape of a flowered pergola.  All it needs is a comatose princess to be a true classic.

appraise_text:
The wrought iron bedstead is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: elegant chaise longue
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This elegant chaise longue has a sturdy teak frame and has been covered with black damask silk.  While it is favoured by seamstresses for the alluring scene it creates with an attractive woman (or man) draped over it, it would be at home in any parlour or drawing room.

appraise_text:
The elegant chaise longue is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: bluebird parasol
weight: about ten pounds
description:
Handcrafted in Water Buffalo Valley, this oiled paper parasol is beautifully handpainted and handmade with sturdy bamboo ribs and a bamboo handle.  Trimmed with black silk, a lovely oak tree, bluebirds and some Agatean symbols grace this white oiled paper parasol.

appraise_text:
The bluebird parasol is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: chessboard
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a medium sized wooden board, divided into 64 squares, which have been alternatingly painted black and white.  32 playing pieces come with it, half of which are white and the rest black.

appraise_text:
The chessboard is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: get better card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a happy-looking get better card.  On the front cover there is a big smiling frog with its leg in plaster.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The get better card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: carved mahogany shelf
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is an ornate shelf carved from mahogany.  The backing board is carved with a detailed representation of a lion's head, while the twin brackets that support the shelf itself are carved to depict feline legs and paws, the claws seeming to grip tightly onto the bottom piece of wood.  The claws themselves are inlaid with bone, completing the animal look.  There is nothing on the carved mahogany shelf.

appraise_text:
The carved mahogany shelf is about three feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of mahogany and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: boggle dice game
weight: less than a pound
description:
The dice are covered in little letters and happy little characters, it looks like an exciting word game.

appraise_text:
The boggle dice game is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small ruby ring
appraise_text: It is made of silver and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 8 g
description:
A tiny ruby set into a silver band, it has been carved to resemble a blooming rose.  Small chips of green paste represent leaves scattered around the band.


item_name: brown perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The brown perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: connect four board
weight: about a pound
description:
A wooden stand up unit with small holes cut through, there is a small strap at the bottom you can move to let the pieces fall out.  There are a bunch of red and green pieces that look like they would fit into the slides at the top kept in a small box at the base of the game.

appraise_text:
The connect four board is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: furniture locking package
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
A small black bag, decorated with mystic-looking sigils woven in gold thread.  The black bag is completely full with an octiron key and an octiron furniture lock.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The black bag is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is black and is made of cotton and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, or fourteen items.


item_name: crowbar
weight: 2 2/9 lb
description:
This is a long crowbar, made of steel.  One of the standard tools of every burglar and miner, it is perfect for prying loose rocks and ore, and for opening windows and safes.

appraise_text:
The crowbar is about two and a half feet long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: [adjective] cabbage hound
appraise_text: You appraise the scrawny cabbage hound and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a highly specialised breed of dog, unique to the Sto Plains and highly prized there for its ability to locate and herd flocks of cabbages, or strays that have wandered from the farm.  He has a yellowing hide and a rather weak jaw, but a deep and resonant bark which carries for miles over the cabbage fields.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.  His fur is silky and smooth.


item_name: arabesque wooden table
weight: about three pounds
description:
This large rectangular wooden table is quite heavy and austere looking.  Consisting of a dour frame connected by waffled lattice panelling, it would complete the most proper of living rooms and make a pleasant accompaniment to most homes.  There is nothing on the arabesque wooden table.

appraise_text:
The arabesque wooden table is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: print of Wildride
weight: about a pound
description:
A pale nude female form sits atop a wildly charging brown stallion in this print of Kenota Verard's Wildride.  She clutches to the horse's neck tightly and is positioned such that her modesty is preserved, mostly.  The scene appears to be a deserted beach near sunrise or sunset as the animal gallops through the very edge of the surf.

appraise_text:
The print of Wildride is about two feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: autumn reliant cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This cabbage has to be planted in late summer or it will flower in Sektober.  It needs lots of pushing, is prone to rot, but is cheap and easy to grow.  It tastes foul because it is stuffed full of vitamins.


item_name: grotesque ebony handchair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This chair is quite literally made from ebony "hands".  Seven of them, to be exact, carved with an eerie lifelike quality.  They are arranged in such a way that anyone sitting on the chair will have all their relevant body parts supported... but not necessarily in comfort.

appraise_text:
The grotesque ebony handchair is about three feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small lump of dried water-buffalo dung
description: This is a small lump of dried water-buffalo dung. It looks as though it would burn well.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The small lump of dried water-buffalo dung is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: candle scented candle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This candle has been made with specially scented wax, so that it now smells exactly like a candle.  Isn't technology wonderful?  It is not currently lit.  It looks as good as new.

appraise_text:
The candle scented candle is about four inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of wax and could be used as a weapon.


item_name: low pine table
weight: about seven pounds
description:
This is a low coffee table, standing about one foot from the ground.  It is made of genuine Hublandish pine, and oiled to bring out the characteristic striped texture.  There is nothing on the low pine table.

appraise_text:
The low pine table is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of pine wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: unfinished swamp dragon [build-a-bear]
description: This is a toy swamp dragon, or at least it will be when it's completed.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The unfinished toy swamp dragon is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of fur and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: pile of sunny yellow cotton cushions
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
This is a large pile of comfortable bright yellow cotton cushions.  Ideal for homeowners who stretch out welcoming arms, they have been arranged on the floor for sitting, lying and lounging.

appraise_text:
The pile of sunny yellow cotton cushions is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cotton and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: dragon and wizard wall piece
weight: about five pounds
description:
About the size of your average footman's shield but somewhat less symmetrical, this wall piece depicts a large noble dragon hissing at a small robed wizard in a way that seems to say, "pass the ketchup".  The wizard, fitted out in star-dotted robes and with a slightly lopsided pointy hat, raises his wooden staff with a knob at the end into the dragon's face defiantly, rather like an ant trying to arm wrestle an elephant.  The dragon in turn, large and fiery red, perches atop a stylised cliff, tail wrapped around a glimmering treasure of sparkling quartz nuggets at the bottom of the piece.  The background comprises a colourful evening sky, complete with lightning bolts and the occasional dark cloud.

appraise_text:
The dragon and wizard wall piece is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Agatean maple stained glass fan lamp
weight: about a pound
description:
This elegant lamp features a stained glass fan which has been attached to a stone pedestal base.  Behind the fan on the pedestal sits a small depression where a tealight may be placed to illuminate the glass and shower fractured colours into the surrounding room.  The stained glass on this particular lamp depicts several reddish brown Agatean maple leaves on a background of yellow-gold and creamy white.  There is nothing on the Agatean maple stained glass fan lamp.

appraise_text:
The Agatean maple stained glass fan lamp is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: sheet of music [Blood]
appraise_text: The sheet of music is about nine inches long and about six inches wide. It is made of paper.
weight: less than a pound
special_find_note: 317e3056b7bdc7fd8621b4d1a42a4207851e0f90
description:
A sheet of music, with a few lines of text on top.  It appears to have something written on it.  Blood.  Lycantrophy expressed in music.  Written in musical notation:  A few staves of a melody that starts at a steady pace but ends in a complicated whirlwind of notes.


item_name: chubby special door lock package
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a small, brown paper bag, just the type to hold sweets, peanuts, or any other similar object.  The paper bag is completely full with a chubby special door lock and a small brass key.  It is open.


item_name: farmer's clock
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a plain clock in a pine case, typical of those found in country kitchens.  The face of the clock is made of ivory paper, the numerals faded with age.  A small glass window in the case provides a view of a small brass pendulum as it swings gently to and fro.  According to the clock it is twenty-five past one on Friday the 1st of June.

appraise_text:
The farmer's clock is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: reversi board
weight: about a pound
description:
A lovely green coloured board board divided into 8 by 8 grid with small black lines.  There are two curved indentations on each side of the board filled with bi coloured discs.

appraise_text:
The reversi board is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pickled goose egg
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
description:
This is a pickled goose egg.  It smells overwhelmingly of vinegar, which is understandable as it was boiled in the stuff.  If you like pickled things, this would be lovely, but if not it'd be best to give it a miss.


item_name: congratulations card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
On the front of this elegant card is a picture of two champagne flutes filled with bubbly.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The congratulations card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: sharpened sai
weight: 1 3/9 lb
description:
Constructed by attaching three prongs to a hilt, this sai has three thin blades which have each been sharpened to vicious-looking points.  The middle blade is considerably longer than the other two and looks perfect for skewering.

appraise_text:
The sharpened sai is about a foot and a half long and about an inch wide.  It is made of iron and could be used as a weapon of type misc.


item_name: red birthday card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
This lovely birthday card is nicely coloured in bright shades of red and blue.  There is a large red heart on the front cover and the words "Happy Birthday" are written under it in curly white letters.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The red birthday card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: walnut coffee table
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This dainty coffee table has been made of dark walnut and polished to a mirror finish.  The legs have been carefully carved to look like miniature human legs, complete with hairy knees.  The table's feet are wearing red high heels.  There is nothing on the walnut coffee table.

appraise_text:
The walnut coffee table is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 5 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: bottle of Skund Moonshine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large purple glass bottle.  This is a bottle of the sort normally used to hold the moonshine which is supposedly brewed in the deeps of the forest of Skund.  Rumour has it, however, that it's brewed in a cellar here in the city, using old socks and discarded thermal underwear.  The large purple bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of moonshine.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large purple bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: yellow marble fireplace
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This fireplace consists of a marble mantlepiece, surround and hearth constructed around a heatproof brick fire pit.  Clearly made by a skilled craftsperson, the yellow marble has been polished to almost a mirror shine that is set off nicely by its violet veins.  It would add a touch of opulent grandeur to any home.  The hearth is blackened with ashes and old embers.  There is nothing on the yellow marble fireplace.

appraise_text:
The yellow marble fireplace is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 13 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: mahogany ink rack
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a tall, spiralling mahogany rack.  Many long, thin glass flutes with rubber stoppers are set vertically into the wooden frame, designed for the storage of ink.  Its base is set on a pivot, allowing the rack to be turned for a full list of its contents.  Its frame and base are left unfinished and could be painted or polished.  All of the glass flutes are empty, waiting to have ink poured into them.

appraise_text:
The mahogany ink rack is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of mahogany and glass and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: cheerful haddock plaque
weight: about a pound
description:
This work of "art" would be quite at home in the sort of pub that has a ten drink minimum; only someone who is really drunk could find a haddock with bright red lipstick on amusing.  The haddock is mounted on a wooden plaque which could be hung on a wall.  There is a small button on the side of the plaque.

appraise_text:
The cheerful haddock plaque is about a foot and a half long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Star of the Aurient tobacco
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small brown leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  The stitching at the seams is slightly ragged.  The brown leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of Star of the Aurient tobacco.  It is open.


item_name: lamb meal
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This meal appears to have had no effort spared in its preparation and will be a treat to anyone who enjoys eating lamb.  Lamb fillets have been prepared in a truffle sauce, along with a small variety of vegetables and a sprinkling of herbs.


item_name: stuffed vine leaves with tomato and yoghurt
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This dish comprises of vine leaves stuffed with a delicious blend of minced meat, tomatoes, rice and herbs.  These are served with Agatha Kolissi's famous tomato sauce and topped with organic Ephebian yoghurt.


item_name: Bottle of Genshu Sake
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a bottle of premium Genshu sake.  It has a square label stuck to it bearing the laughing panda logo of the Kou Ture Sake Emporium.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The Genshu bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: diamond chest
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
Pine boards line this chest, although the fact is not readily apparent.  Small, diamond shaped holes have been cut into the wood, and these holes outline patterns of diamonds.  At each corner of the patterns glittering gems have been placed: rubies, emeralds and sapphires.  Not only do adjacent gems also form diamond patterns, but adjacent gems of the same colour form even larger diamonds.  At the four corners of the diamond shaped chest, small gilded statuettes of famous historical figures stretch down to the floor, supporting the chest.  Each figure wears a tiny crown set with diamonds.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The diamond chest is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 33 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: orange duck
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
No, it's not a duck that's orange, it's a duck that has been cooked in orange juice to give it a very nice flavour.  This does, of course, give it a marginally orange hue, but this is besides the point.  Just shut up and eat the damn thing, would you?


item_name: ornate bone shield
weight: 12 8/9 lb
description:
Scapula radiate like blades around a central core of iron.  Several split femurs and a rather nasty looking hand form a morbid mosaic along the plate.  The beat iron plate is marked with runes that flow like living metal.  The bones almost seem to be grown and not made.  A heavy aura of magic seems to cling to this shield giving it an eerie feeling.  Octarine light pulses around it like an evil heartbeat.  It has the hazy octarine sparkle of a magical talisman.

appraise_text:
The ornate bone shield is about four feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of iron and looks like it could be held as a shield.


item_name: warm-n-slippery sensation
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
A small bowl of broth.  It is lukewarm and slimy.  It's made with plenty of grease and squiddy tentacles.


item_name: glass of blood orange juice
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a medium sized glass with a few chips in it from use, other than that it holds liquids not much more can be said about it.  The glass of blood orange juice is completely full with one cup of blood orange juice.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The glass of blood orange juice is roughly a couple of inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, about twenty items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: Bottle of Koshino Sake
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a bottle of premium Koshino sake.  It has a square label stuck to it bearing the laughing panda logo of the Kou Ture Sake Emporium.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The Koshino bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: tenor saxophone
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a cool tenor saxophone made out of shiny brass.  It's basically a conical tube with a hump-backed crook in one end and a reed mouthpiece in the other, with numerous finger keys down the sides.

appraise_text:
The tenor saxophone is about two feet long and about six inches wide.  It is made of brass and appears to be a musical instrument from the wind family.


item_name: Auriental portrait
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a moderately large portrait of an Auriental lady, in a colourful kimono.  The portrait is done on rice paper.  Given that very little trade exists between the Empire and Ankh Morpork, it must be a very rare and valuable piece of art. (Or a clever Morporkian reproduction.)

appraise_text:
The Auriental portrait is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: door locking package
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
A small black bag, decorated with mystic-looking sigils woven in gold thread.  The black bag is completely full with an octiron key and an octiron door lock.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The black bag is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is black and is made of cotton and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, or fourteen items.


item_name: long redwood bench
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a long kitchen bench, designed to stretch all the way along one wall and give the cook a working surface that will stretch from one wall to another.  It is open at the front, with two open shelves set in it, for extra storage area.  There is nothing on the long redwood bench.

appraise_text:
The long redwood bench is about ten feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: lustrous [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of lustrous [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of lustrous [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: wearable bird
appraise_text: You appraise the colourful parrot and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about a pound
description:
This parrot stands about eight inches high, each inch covered in magnificent, colourful feathers.  The green plumage on his head blends down into a canary yellow on his somewhat rotund belly, complementing the bright shades of red and green which cover his wings.  A sharp looking beak gives the impression that this bird might do you some harm, although this is belied by the docile eyes which utterly fail to glare from either side of his small head.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.


item_name: medium-sized polished luggage
description: This medium-sized chest is shuffling about at the back of the shop, waiting to be bought.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The medium-sized polished luggage is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: painted white mantelpiece
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This simple mantelpiece is covered in swan's wing white enamel paint.  It is aesthetically designed with graceful, stately curves leading up to the mantel itself.  There is nothing on the painted white mantelpiece.

appraise_text:
The painted white mantelpiece is about two feet long and about six inches wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 6 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: decorative armoire
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
The armoire looks sturdy and is capable of housing quite a few items.  Its doors have been inlaid with different coloured pieces of wood to form a decorative pattern.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The decorative armoire is about four feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 50 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: Pet Truffle Pig
appraise_text: You appraise the sleepy young truffle pig and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a roughed young pig, which has been specially trained from an early age to sniff out hidden truffles lurking in the ground when given appropriate encouragement.  Her large dark grey body jiggles from side to side as she moves about.  She is in good shape.  She is standing.  Her bristles are silky and smooth.


item_name: long rose enamelled coffee table
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This long black table has been constructed in the typical Auriental style.  Lacquered lavishly in a shiny black, its short legs rise up to a narrow angular body which has been painted carefully and lovingly with thick swirls of pink hues to create a fabulous rose.    There is nothing on the long rose enamelled coffee table.

appraise_text:
The long rose enamelled coffee table is about three feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 33 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: rice paper geisha screen
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a simple screen that would fit in most traditional homes.  Quiet geishas relax on its rice paper panelling, hand-drawn on a bamboo balcony, they sit and sip tea in peace and solitude or play mandolin-like instruments which sit silently in their laps.  The frame is made of a strange combination of walnut and spruce woods, their differing colours blending well with the shades of the panels.

appraise_text:
The rice paper geisha screen is about six feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of paper and wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large first aid kit
description:
This is a large steel box for keeping bandages in.  Thinly-pressed Klatchian steel, to be specific, its famed hardness and strength entirely wasted on keeping bandages safe from impalement.  Its cover has a glass window set into it, allowing anyone in need of a bandage to see how full it is.  To keep the bandages dry and clean, the inner surface of the box is silver-plated and a thin strip of rubber has been laid down along the crack between its cover and its sides.  A vertical red cross, the symbol of Glaxos, the God of Medicine, is embossed on the side.


item_name: painting of a fisherman with his daily catch
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a traditional Agatean scroll painting of fisherman returning home with his day's catch.  Wearing a conical peasants' hat and bundled up in some loose-fitting clothing that has been tied up with a simple makeshift obi, he has a fishing pole slung over one shoulder and a net full of fish slung over the other.

appraise_text:
The painting of a fisherman with his daily catch is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [adjective] [colour] saluki
appraise_text: You appraise the soft-eyed red and white saluki and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
Shrouded in the mists of time, the origins of this graceful hound predate most civilisations.  Long sacred to the D'reg tribes, she has the elegant, streamlined physique and the sweet, dignified but reserved expression of the gazelles she was bred to hunt.  Fine silky red hair veils her back and flanks in soft waves, shading through all the variations to the rich white colour of her belly, throat and face.  Long red-shadowed feathering adorns her ears and tail, and the backs of her legs.  She is in good shape.  She is standing.  Her fur is silky and beautifully feathered.


item_name: majestic bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This bed has four legs, each extending above the base of the frame.  Upon each leg the same intricate, recursive pattern is inlaid in fine metallic wire, with a different metal for each leg: brass, gold, platinum and octiron.  Upon each leg perches a cherrywood cherub, who holds in his arms a short silver pole.  To the poles are attached a velvet canopy, midnight blue in tint.  The sides of the frame have all but disappeared, such is the density of the cut-out scrollwork they boast.  From the bowed centre of the canopy hangs a many-faceted diamond, stark against the darkened background.

appraise_text:
The majestic bed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: thank-you card (closed)
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a very polite-looking thank-you card.  A royal blue border floats on a silvery background, surrounding a picture of a grateful-looking person.  It is closed.  There is some fine handwriting on the outside.

appraise_text:
The thank-you card (closed) is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of card.


item_name: bright green anaconda
appraise_text: You appraise the bright green anaconda and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about seven pounds
description:
This is a nice large bright green anaconda.  It looks like it would look really good draped around your neck.  It is in good shape.  It is lying.  It looks perfectly happy.


item_name: gold-leafed peony fishbowl
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Richly designed with blooming peonies, the flower that symbolises peace and prosperity in Agatean culture, this grand sixteen-inch fishbowl is carefully hand-layered with gold leaf over porcelain and hand-painted in exuberant colours.  This fishbowl matches any kind of foliage or simply stands alone as an art object.  Resting on a beautiful hand-polished rosewood base, the shapes of several goldfish can be seen swishing back and forth beneath the water it holds.

appraise_text:
The gold-leafed peony fishbowl is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: pile of white and blue cotton cushions
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This is an enormous cluster of soft white cushions that have been embroidered with large navy blue crosses.  They have been arranged on the floor for sitting, lying and lounging.

appraise_text:
The pile of white and blue cotton cushions is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large green conch
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a large green conch shell.  It's a very nice conch, though.  You definitely haven't seen many better conch shells than this.  It's a premium quality conch.  Can you tell I'm rambling?

appraise_text:
The large green conch is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: king's snivel cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
Ephebian mythology tells us that this cabbage sprang from the fallen tears of a king who was about to be killed by one of the Gods for making water amongst His holy grove of turnips.  As the king's tears fell, the god felt compassion and turned him into a tortoise.  He was eaten by an eagle five minutes later, but it's the thought that counts.


item_name: rum and raisin dark chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a rum and raisin praline.  It is filled with some soft raisins that have been soaked in a sweet pool of the finest rum.  It looks delicious and is probably quite expensive.


item_name: transparent red perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny bottle of scent.  It has a tiny label on it with a picture of some frankincense.  You could probably spray it on and find yourself gorgeous to the casual observer.

appraise_text:
The transparent red perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: Buffalo tobacco, the people's choice
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small brown leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  The stitching at the seams is slightly ragged.  The brown leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of buffalo special brand tobacco.  It is open.


item_name: tiny firecracker
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a tiny red tube sporting a short fuse that you could probably light to see some entertaining effects.  Holding it for too long after this is done is ill advised, though.

appraise_text:
The tiny firecracker is about three inches long and about an inch wide.  It is red and is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: fine redwood pet coffin
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a beautiful little coffin fit for the Queen's dead cat.  It is made of redwood with gold inlay.  It has a stunning white silk and lace interior, and even a little pillow and quilt made to fit any pampered pet.  You could probably heft a corpse into this coffin.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The fine redwood pet coffin is about two and a half feet long and about three and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 22 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: passways board
weight: less than a pound
description:
This wooden board has had lots of painted square tiles glued to it.  Even more tiles are loose, and can be placed to create all sorts of passways.  The corner squares simply show a colour each.

appraise_text:
The passways board is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: taiko drum
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a flat disc-like drum, about three feet in diameter.  It is suspended from a large square wooden frame by three springs, two of which hang from each of the uppermost corners of the frame, whilst the third secures it at the bottom.  It also has a very steep slope from the centre of its shell to its head which helps provide a rich, warm tone when it is struck.

appraise_text:
The taiko drum is about three feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: small barrel
description: This is a small barrel that looks like it could be used to contain spices. It is open.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The small barrel is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of wood and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 88 pounds, about one hundred and ten items, or about 1 quart.


item_name: pretty wooden wind chime
weight: about a pound
description:
The centre of this pretty wooden wind chime is a of a beautifully carved block of wood onto which a tiny bell has been attached by a length of string.  Surrounding the bell are several hollow wooden tubes which, when combined with a light breeze, make a quite delightful and soothing sound.

appraise_text:
The pretty wooden wind chime is about a foot and a half long and about a foot wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: old pine writing desk
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a sturdy old writing desk, made of heavy pine wood, once polished to a fine gloss but now scuffed and mellowed with time.  Four drawers are set in the front, each with a simple brass handle.  There is nothing on the old pine writing desk.

appraise_text:
The old pine writing desk is about five feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: short steel baton
weight: 1 3/9 lb
description:
This is a short baton made of quality Klatchian steel.  A perfect cylinder its entire length, save for ridges near one end for a grip, it certainly isn't the most elegant of weapons - however, it should do nicely to put some dents in someone's head at close quarters.

appraise_text:
The short steel baton is about a foot long and about an inch wide.  It is made of klatchian steel and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: print of Counting Sheep
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a print of Melderelda Archtorp's Counting Sheep.  Gentle hills form the backdrop of this pastoral scene which was originally painted in watercolours.  A meadow of grass and wild buttercups is spotted with fluffy white sheep with black faces.  In the foreground, a shepherd is lying lazily in the grass, one leg crossed over the other and a straw hat over his eyes.

appraise_text:
The print of Counting Sheep is about two feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: transparent perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny bottle of scent.  It has a tiny label on it with a picture of some vanilla sticks.  You could probably spray it on and find yourself gorgeous to the casual observer.

appraise_text:
The transparent perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: chipped teacup
weight: about a pound
description:
Every third teacup in the Multiverse becomes chipped or loses its saucer.  This has done both.  Once it was part of an impressive set from Hung-hung.  Now it is merely useful for cluttering up cupboards and junk stores.

appraise_text:
The chipped teacup is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: antique drinks cabinet
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a fairly simple rectangular cabinet made from golden-grained teak.  Plain, yet elegant brass hinges and knobs and the glass front catch the light with a soft gleam, while inside, two sturdy shelves offer support for any good host's needs.  Time and loving hands have worn down most of the sharp edges, but this only adds to the lustre of the wood.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The antique drinks cabinet is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 30 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: dried banana
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
If you were a monkey you'd be in banana heaven, looking at this!  Yellow, bendy and smelling like a banana, it's just perfect!  It is all dry and shrivelled up.


item_name: ceramic pitcher
weight: about fifteen pounds
special_find_note: af6fb1bd2124a1f8b43c35fdfcee0a8582cd95f5
description:
This is a large ceramic pitcher.  It has green flower etchings around the rim but is otherwise quite plain.

appraise_text:
The ceramic pitcher is about a foot and a half long and about a foot wide.  It is made of ceramic and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 33 pounds, about sixty items, or about 2 gallons. 


item_name: cheap wooden phoenix egg
description: This is a poorly made replica of a phoenix egg, made of wood.
weight: about three pounds
appraise_text:
The cheap wooden phoenix egg is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: white leather armchair
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This is a fairly large armchair, with thick and very soft arms, seat and back.  It is covered in soft leather, dyed pure white.  It looks nice and comfortable, although it does have the debatable disadvantage that even the smallest stain will be very visible on it.

appraise_text:
The white leather armchair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Sekkite robe [build-a-bear]
weight: about three pounds
description:
This tiny blood-red robe has been crafted especially for a worshipper of Sek.  Flames are licking up the sleeves and there is a motif of Sek worn like a badge, just at heart height.

appraise_text:
The blood-red Sekkite robe is about six inches long and about four inches wide.  It is blood-red and is made of cotton and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: withered cucumber sandwich
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
description:
Old, leathery bread has had the crusts daintily cut away and been rolled through a mangle, before being doused in rancid grease and lined with rotting cucumber.  The corners are curling.  Dust almost seems to have gathered on the surfaces, and the whole has been cut into a neat and delicate triangle.  Yum.


item_name: [adjective] [colour] greyhound
appraise_text: You appraise the smooth white greyhound and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
A sleek, contoured dog built for speed, with a very deep chest and an elegantly curved spine.  Her head is long and slim, and her small rose ears are folded back on either side of her gentle dark eyes.  The curve of her long, elegant neck perfectly complements the powerful arch of her hindquarters.  She is in good shape.  She is standing.  Her fur is sleek and glossy.  She looks rather cold.


item_name: Bottle of Doburoku Sake
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a bottle of premium Doburoku sake.  It has a square label stuck to it bearing the laughing panda logo of the Kou Ture Sake Emporium.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The Doburoku bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: simple three tier wedding cake
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about four pounds
description:
Made from a rich fruit cake covered in white marzipan, this is a simple wedding cake made with three tiers.  White roses have been positioned artfully around each level, and a strip of white icing runs around the edge of every one.  On the top stands a small model of a happy couple.


item_name: packet of ten quilting blocks
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a large pale blue packet, rather like an envelope, of thick paper that has been waxed to make it more resilient.  The large pale blue waxed paper packet is completely full with a deep red silk quilting block, a lemon yellow silk quilting block, a blue silk quilting block, an indigo silk quilting block, a bright blue silk quilting block, a grey silk quilting block, a chocolate brown silk quilting block, a dark indigo silk quilting block, a light yellow silk quilting block and a pale red silk quilting block.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large pale blue waxed paper packet is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is pale blue and is made of paper and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, or twelve items.


item_name: bottle of Stardrip Plum Brandy
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large brown glass bottle.  This is a bottle of Stardrip Plum Brandy, brewed here in the Ramtops.  The large brown bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of brandy.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large brown bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: small shower firework
weight: about a pound
description:
A long, thin tube made of cardboard, it appears that you might be able to "fire" it up into the air.

appraise_text:
The small shower firework is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: spring garden parasol
weight: about seven pounds
description:
Vibrant red tulips with green stalks and a cluster of yellow butterflies grace this oiled white paper parasol.  Perfect for garden parties, this lovely parasol would also make a charming piece of art to keep in the home.

appraise_text:
The spring garden parasol is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: ink well containing [colour] ink
weight: less than a pound
description:
This ink well is a small tin bottle with a wide mouth and a close-fitting cork.  The ink well is completely full with two ounces of [colour] ink.  It is completely full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The ink well is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of tin and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, six items, or about 3 shots.


item_name: large non-puce conch
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a large non-puce conch shell.  It's a very nice conch, though.  You definitely haven't seen many better conch shells than this.  It's a premium quality conch.  Can you tell I'm rambling?

appraise_text:
The large non-puce conch is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: ornamental tiger lily table
weight: about fifty pounds
description:
This is a relatively large circular table that has been carefully carved out of cherry wood.  Large tiger lilies and beaded vines have been whittled into the wood, obviously crafted over many years.  The surface of the table has been inlaid with small tiles of porcelain, each depicting a unique tiger lily blossom in various stages of bloom.  There is nothing on the ornamental tiger lily table.

appraise_text:
The ornamental tiger lily table is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 31 pounds, or about seventy items.


item_name: genuine Genuan parlour stove
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
Bonjour mon ami.  Comment ca va?  I am from Genua and I radiate, non?  As you can see, I am all dolled up and ready to dance zee night away.  And I last all night long too; you'll feel my 'eat for a good 8-10 hours.  When you walk into zee room, your eyes will see me, because not only is my 'eight tall, but I dazzle, as you can see from my fancy details including my heavy aprons.  I radiate any home, and I very much want to radiate yours.  There is nothing on the genuine Genuan parlour stove.

appraise_text:
The genuine Genuan parlour stove is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: Quirmian dining chair
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
Made to accent the Quirmian dining table, this armless chair is made by a family of cabinet makers who have served the aristocracy of Quirm for the last 375 years.  Sinuous lines and refined comfort set these chairs apart from most of their more modern rivals.

appraise_text:
The Quirmian dining chair is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: cherry kraken bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This bed has been cunningly carved from cherry wood to resemble a kraken surfacing from the ocean.  Its huge open beak holds a mattress, the beak halves serving as the head and the foot of the bed.  The rest of its head is only hinted at, with monstrous dark eyes surrounded by wrinkled cherry wood skin.  Long suckered tentacles rise from its sides to curl menacingly over it all.  Only the most fearless of sleepers would dare lie in this bed.

appraise_text:
The cherry kraken bed is about five and a half feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of cherry wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: tranquil wind chime
weight: about a pound
description:
Handmade from solid bamboo, this beautiful piece of artwork resonates peacefully as 18 small individual chimes strike each other softly.  The long bamboo pole from which the chimes dangle hangs at an angle, supported by a triangle of braided leather strands.

appraise_text:
The tranquil wind chime is about a foot and a half long and about six inches wide.  It is made of bamboo and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: catch the flag box
description: A small box with a bunch of flags inside it. They appear to be in all sorts of colours.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The catch the flag box is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: quilting book
weight: less than a pound
description:
The cover of this book features a patchwork quilt that has been quilted all over with a simple square pattern.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed quilting pattern book is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: bloody apron
description: This apron was white once, but it is now streaked with bloodstains, both fresh and old.
weight: 4/9 lb
appraise_text:
The bloody apron is about three feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of cotton and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: large battered suitcase
weight: about forty pounds
description:
This large suitcase has seen some use, if the scratches and dents all over it are anything to go by.  It is made from sturdy brown leather and is rectangular in shape.  It has a brass lock that is shaped like a vulture's head in profile.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large battered suitcase is about two and a half feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of leather and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 22 pounds, or about sixty items.


item_name: loaded eight-sided die
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a die nicely carved from ivory with eight sides.  This die is special because a secret widget inside of the die can be set, enabling it to land on any side the roller chooses.  The widget is currently set to eight.

appraise_text:
The loaded eight-sided die is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: large mahogany chest of drawers
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a large chest of mahogany drawers, carefully bound up with large brass belts and tickled with handles of polished bronze.  Rather tall, it complements mahogany nightstands and other bedroom furnishings beautifully as it holds belongings securely.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large mahogany chest of drawers is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: dark chocolate liqueur milk chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a dark chocolate liqueur praline.  It is filled with a dark chocolate liquer that promises to leave a slight sting on the tongue.  A covering of milk chocolate, decorated with half a cocoa bean, completes the creation.  It looks delicious and is probably quite expensive.


item_name: Quow's Magical Research [Methods vs Spells]
description:
A research book by Quow, going into full public research for the first time exactly how pure ma.sp.offensive affects your spells versus how the methods of a spell affects it beyond simply succeeding to cast, complete with tips on how to spend your experience as you advance your wizzard, and more.


item_name: small block of frankincense
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a dried block of resin.  While untreated, it is meant to be burned for its aroma.  It is not currently lit.  It is unmarred and unburned.

appraise_text:
The small block of frankincense is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of resin and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: wizard hat [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is your typical, common or laboratory, pointy hat such as any wizard worth his salt would wear, except for its diminutive size.  Typical of the species, it is decorated in a style that would make a blind man shy away.

appraise_text:
The wizard's hat is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of bone and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: muddy brown candle
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This candle is the exact shade of the muddy centre of Lancre Town square.  It is not currently lit.  It is brand new.

appraise_text:
The muddy brown candle is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of beeswax and could be used as a weapon.


item_name: shot glass of brandy
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a nicely made shot glass, of the sort usually used to serve spirit measures in pubs and restaurants.  The shot glass of brandy is about half full with three teaspoons of brandy.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The shot glass of brandy is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: bright red candle
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This candle is bright red, like the kind of boiled sweet that's really, really bad for your teeth.  It is not currently lit.  It is brand new.

appraise_text:
The bright red candle is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of beeswax and could be used as a weapon.


item_name: transparent blue perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a tiny bottle of scent.  It has a tiny label on it with a picture of some patchouli, whatever that might be.  You could probably spray it on and find yourself gorgeous to the casual observer.

appraise_text:
The transparent blue perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: bonsai stained glass fan lamp
weight: about a pound
description:
This elegant lamp features a stained glass fan which has been attached to a stone pedestal base.  Behind the fan on the pedestal sits a small depression where a tealight may be placed to illuminate the glass and shower fractured colours into the surrounding room.  The stained glass on this particular lamp depicts a small bonsai tree which elicits the illusion of growing out of the pedestal, its short evergreen needles giving way to deep brown fruit.  There is nothing on the bonsai stained glass fan lamp.

appraise_text:
The bonsai stained glass fan lamp is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1 pound, or one item.


item_name: measure of whiskey
weight: less than a pound
description:
This a standard looking pint glass.  The measure glass of whiskey is completely full with two tablespoons of whiskey.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The measure glass of whiskey is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, four items, or about 1 shot.


item_name: bag of candied fruits
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a small rectangular paper bag of a chic and tasteful, deep dark green.  Painted on it in suave gold letters is the word "Hayaryu's".  The spartan green bag contains:  ten chocolate covered candied fruits.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The spartan green bag is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: morporkian carriages game
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a board game upon which you can play Morporkian Carriages.  On a board slightly larger than a foot square, it has a small map of Ankh-Morpork, showing all the carriage routes and stops.

appraise_text:
The morporkian carriages game is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: granite sarcophagus
weight: about seven hundred pounds
description:
This is a sturdy sarcophagus made from granite.  This sarcophagus is just the thing to entomb your dear departed brother, friend, spouse or Pharaoh in.  You could probably heft a mummy into this coffin.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The granite sarcophagus is about eight and a half feet long and about four and a half feet wide.  It is yellow and is made of granite and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 555 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: pattern of flowering roses stick-on applique
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an applique designed to be applied to walls as a decoration.  It has the following design on it:  A pattern of flowering roses.

appraise_text:
The pattern of flowering roses stick-on applique is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of cardboard.


item_name: knapsack
weight: 3 3/9 lb
description:
This is a large canvas knapsack with a couple of hefty straps to support it on each shoulder - you could wear it on just one shoulder, although it would be awkward.  It is quite capacious.  The knapsack has one top pocket, two main pockets and two side pockets.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The knapsack is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of canvas and looks like you could wear it.  It can hold about 44 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: squat porcelain jug
weight: about a pound
description:
This squat wash jug exudes jolliness.  Quite how a construction of thick porcelain, painted white with a chipped handle, manages to look jolly is not quite clear.  Perhaps it's got to do with the chubby pig cavorting around the side.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The squat porcelain jug is about a foot and a half long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of porcelain and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about forty items, or about 1 quart.


item_name: small arrowhead
appraise_text: The small arrowhead is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide. It is made of iron.
weight: less than a pound
special_find_note: 8c604f66edc0bd8ab89a8a616a7ba3275d4e2932
description:
This is a small arrowhead.  It looks like it was once lovely and pointy and sharp, but now it is just dull and rusted, as if it has been lying about in the open for some time.


item_name: luxurious coffin-bed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This coffin is for the well-to-do vampire who is looking for an upgrade to the box in which he was actually buried.  The case itself is made of imported ebony and it is lined with crimson silk.  The lid has been deeply carved with skulls, funeral lilies, and other suitably grim motifs.  The lid fits snugly to keep out any light.

appraise_text:
The luxurious coffin-bed is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: flaming pink perfume bottle
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The flaming pink perfume bottle is about three inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: brown-flecked ivory amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from fine clay, and glazed with a brown-flecked ivory glaze, this amphora is painted with the black silhouettes of a group of lithe and nubile nymphs (why are nymphs never clumsy and oldbile?) fleeing (but not too effectively) a satyr, who, despite his chase, has enough wind to by playing a set of pipes.  A work of fine art, as proven by its classic theme, its handles are long and seem to be formed of clay shaped like blunt spears.  Probably spears.  Its cylindrical stopper is made of pressed cork and has a knob on the end. It is not attached to the neck of the amphora - never try to tie a cork to just one bottle.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The brown-flecked ivory amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: silk bamboo plant
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
This is a pot of silken bamboo shoots.  It is a young plant and the stems and leaves are thin and have been dyed a vibrant green.  Stalks filled with young shoots burst out all over.  Potted in a wicker basket which has been  filled in crunchy green lichen, followers of the ancient art of Fung Shooey believe bamboo is a lucky plant to have in the home.

appraise_text:
The silk bamboo plant is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Dish of Glistening Brown Stuff
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
You can't tell what this is.  It's glistening, it's brown, and it's stuff.  It does smell good, however.


item_name: meerschaum ashtray
weight: less than a pound
description:
As meerschaum is a creamy white mineral that comes from the sea where it floats ashore on the waves - or so the carvers of meerschaum claim!  When meerschaum dries, it becomes extremely hard and durable.  When the craftsman gave shape to the stone in his skilled hands, he aspired to create the visionary beauty of a ring of dancing maidens.  There is nothing on the meerschaum ashtray.

appraise_text:
The meerschaum ashtray is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of stone.  It can hold less than one pound.


item_name: eggshell [scent] broom polish
description: A small ceramic jar of off-white waxy stuff. It is full of eggshell [scent] broom polish.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The jar of eggshell [scent] broom polish is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of clay.


item_name: stealth clock
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a special clock that never chimes, ticks, or makes any sound at all.  It is made of blackened iron with a face of black paper.  The numbers have been painted in black, as have the hands that creep stealthily around the dial.  It is an ideal time piece for those of a nervous disposition who, for instance, have been traumatised by a cuckoo clock.  It is also an excellent choice for those in the covert professions who favour all things black.  According to the clock it is twenty-five past one on Friday the 1st of June.

appraise_text:
The stealth clock is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is black and is made of iron and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: traditional mottos embroidery book
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a book of traditional embroidery patterns.  On the front is a picture of a beautiful embroidery of a straw basket filled with assorted garden flowers, and below, a message written in ornate, old-fashioned letters.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The closed traditional mottos embroidery pattern book is about nine inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: colourful Claro Cliff plate
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a well-made plate, glazed in colourful shades.  There is a colourful depiction of a country landscape painted on it in bright, bold shades.  A small CC monogram has been carefully signed on the reverse.  There is nothing on the colourful Claro Cliff plate.

appraise_text:
The colourful Claro Cliff plate is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of pottery.  It can hold about 5 pounds.


item_name: woodsman's axe
weight: 4 lb
description:
This is a viciously sharp woodsman's axe.  The blade is honed to a disturbingly keen edge.  It looks perfect for chopping down trees... or dealing with bad wolves.

appraise_text:
The woodsman's axe is about three feet long and about six inches wide.  It is made of steel and wood and could be used as a weapon of type axe.


item_name: emerald studded shield
weight: 12 4/9 lb
description:
A graceful arabesque design is picked out on the front of this shield in glittering emeralds and shadowed in gold.  It exudes wealth - the sort where you can afford to put gems on the front of your shield where they're probably going to get knocked loose at the slightest provocation because your bodyguards will stop any fighting before it gets near you.  The green leather strap on the back of the shield enables easy holding as well as a touch of style.

appraise_text:
The emerald studded shield is about three and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of steel and looks like it could be held as a shield.


item_name: polished turtle shell
weight: about six pounds
description:
Part of the belief in voodoo in Genua is centred around the negative energy that a practitioner can inflict on his or her unwilling target.  In an attempt to avoid such negative energy, the canny Genuan will make use of juju talismans... items that are designed to ward off negative energy within a location.  Sometimes the polished shell of a turtle is used for this purpose, and placed somewhere in a home to ward off harm.  Whether removing the shell of an unwilling turtle is a good idea in the eyes of the Gods is a matter for some debate.  After all, remember how the Discworld travels through space.

appraise_text:
The polished turtle shell is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [adjective] fox terrier
appraise_text: You appraise the perky fox terrier and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a smart and stylish little dog with a busy air and suspicious attitude towards any other non-human animal.  His half-docked tail stands straight up over his back, and his folded ears are alert and interested over his box-shaped head.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.  His coat is smooth and glossy.


item_name: antique rose-pattern wardrobe
weight: about seventy pounds
description:
This is a rather big wardrobe.  Engraved into its sides are a large number of rose patterns, none of which seem to be identical.  Judging by its general appearance, this piece of furniture is quite old, one could even say antique.  A brass lock is set into the wardrobe's door to keep whatever is inside safe from spying eyes.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The antique rose-pattern wardrobe is about seven feet long and about five feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 50 pounds, or about eighty items.


item_name: medium-sized tasselled luggage
description: This medium-sized chest is shuffling about at the back of the shop, waiting to be bought.
weight: about a pound
appraise_text:
The medium-sized tasselled luggage is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: sepia wicker chair
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
Someone with a true fondness for wood has fashioned this small chair.  Its sturdy frame supports a seat and back of strongly woven sepia wicker-work, and legs and struts are wound about with fine strips of the same.  A few abstract patterns have been worked into the material, making for an attractive and functional seat.

appraise_text:
The sepia wicker chair is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of cane and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: [style] jambiya
weight: 1 6/9 lb
description:
A heavy dagger with a curved blade that has a rib running down the centre, this jambiya is a weapon of great beauty.  The [material] hilt has two large chunks of [stone] set above and below the point where it narrows to fit perfectly into the curve of the hand.  The blade is solid klatchian steel and has been deeply etched with a pattern of [pattern].

appraise_text:
The gold-hilted jambiya is about a foot long and about three inches wide.  It is made of klatchian steel and steel and could be used as a weapon of type dagger.


item_name: Quow's Magical Research [Enchanted Blorples]
description:
A research book by Quow, a short a simple analysis of enchanting your blorpled jewellery, covering the research done into whether this is worthwhile or not and if it actually affects damage taken to jewellery from portalling.


item_name: Happy Birthday banner
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a big blue banner decorated with a couple of stars and, and a few candles seemingly melting over the letters.

appraise_text:
The Happy Birthday banner is about three feet long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of cotton and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: Special Cow Pie
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a very special cow pie.  It could be used as fuel for a fire, a frisbee, a pair could be used to keep feet warm, all sorts!

appraise_text:
The special cow pie is about ten inches long and about ten inches wide.  It is made of organic goodness.


item_name: bottle of Morporkian Real Ale
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large brown glass bottle.  The large brown bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of Morporkian beer.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large brown bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: glass tumbler of weak lemon drink
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a short glass tumbler, of the sort usually found in pubs and restaurants.  The glass tumbler of weak lemon drink is completely full with one cup of weak lemon drink.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The glass tumbler of weak lemon drink is about three inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eleven items, or about 2 gills.


item_name: some hemlock
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small pile of hemlock, about one stalk.  A tall, graceful looking plant with small white flowers.


item_name: smooth black wardrobe
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
Standing six feet high, or just too tall for the average Agatean to see on top, this wardrobe is a geometrically perfect slab of satin-finished oak, with only a very small keyhole marking the utterly smooth and black surface.  It looks so clean and spare, so stylishly minimalistic and uncluttered, that you feel sure the top surface is thick with dust where you can't see it.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The smooth black wardrobe is about six feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 52 pounds, or about ninety items.


item_name: [colour] ragdoll cat
appraise_text: You appraise the red ragdoll cat and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
A large floppy cat with a rather lazy appearance and captivating blue eyes.  Her long, silky coat is soft and graceful, finer than most cats' fur.  Her body is a pale creamy colour, with a dark ginger-red colour on her face, feet, ears and tail.    She is in good shape.  She is standing.


item_name: shimmering white egg
description: This is a shimmering white egg that seems to glow faintly.
weight: less than a pound
special_find_note: 8c05125020445df53ccd8792b32e841d51b7e73b
appraise_text:
The shimmering white egg is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is white and is made of egg.


item_name: barrel of metaxa
weight: about six hundred pounds
description:
This is a large, sturdy oak barrel, the sort used for storing wine since wine-making began.  The oak barrel is completely full with many gallons of ephebian metaxa.  It is completely full.  It is open.


item_name: votive candle
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small, slow-burning candle, usually placed in shrines or the home to ward off evil spirits or, for the devotees of the Ancient Art of Fung Shooey, to divert the Flow of Chi.  It is not currently lit.  It is almost new.

appraise_text:
The votive candle is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: marble tiled bath
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This marble tiled bath is huge and would only fit in a large room.  It's also so heavy that once it's in place you won't ever want to move it.  However, its opulence is impressive.  The coloured marble was quarried from all over the Discworld, precision cut into thousands of small tiles and subsequently arranged into complex swirly patterns on the bathtub.  The taps on this masterpiece are made from the finest polished bronze and are moulded in the shape of leaping fish, the water spouting from their mouths.

appraise_text:
The marble tiled bath is about ten feet long and about four feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 1111 pounds, about sixty items, or about 104 gallons.


item_name: set of three nested gold-leaf tables
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Exhibiting its pleasing simple lines in a distinct Sung style, this exquisite set of nested tables is arranged in a three-tiered pullout fashion that allows several surfaces to be available in a small space.  Each table is hand-painted with a delicate flowers-and-bird design over a lush gold-leafed surface.  The workmanship is so precise that a joinery technique has been used to fasten the tables together, so perfect that no nails were used in the tables' construction.  There is nothing on the set of three nested gold-leaf tables.

appraise_text:
The set of three nested gold-leaf tables is about a foot and a half long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 8 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: pair of black stompy boots [build-a-bear]
description: This is a miniature pair of stompy boots, the kind that witches would probably wear.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The pair of black stompy boots is about an inch long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is black and is made of leather and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: glass of olive wine
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a nicely made wine glass, of the sort usually used to serve red, white and rose wine in pubs and restaurants.  The wine glass of olive wine is about half full with three ounces of olive wine.  It is about half full.

appraise_text:
The wine glass of olive wine is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold less than one pound, eight items, or about 1 gill.


item_name: pinwheel column stove
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
The columns of this cast iron column stove feature elaborately detailed filigree.  Pinwheel doors sit behind a matching draft control and clean out drawer on the extended bottom lip.  Four decorated legs sport the same motif as the body, which is repeated upon the columns and the centred cook lid.  This column stove will claim a special place in the hearth and in the heart of almost any home.  There is nothing on the pinwheel column stove.

appraise_text:
The pinwheel column stove is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: large burlap sack
weight: 1/9 lb
description:
This is a large burlap sack, used to carry sugar or some other powdery product.  It can be opened or closed via a draw-string at the top of the sack.

appraise_text:
The large burlap sack is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of hessian and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 105 pounds, or about one hundred and twenty items.


item_name: personal postal card
appraise_text: The postal card is about four inches long and about six inches wide. It is made of cardboard.
weight: less than a pound
description:
The front of this card displays a mighty scene: the Discworld, carried through space on the backs of four giant elephants, standing on the shell of A'Tuin.  A faceless figure is standing on top of the disc of the world, wearing a sash and proudly holding a bucket in one hand and a torch in the other.  It is waving at you.  The back is left white, and can be used to write on.


item_name: Rimwards tobacco from far realms
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a small brown leather pouch designed for carrying tobacco.  The stitching at the seams is slightly ragged.  The brown leather pouch is about one-quarter full with one handful of rimwards mild tobacco.  It is open.


item_name: yellowish wooden chair
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a plain chair made out of sturdy yellowish wood.  It's not very decorative, but it will last for some time, and stand around in an unassuming way in the kitchen.

appraise_text:
The yellowish wooden chair is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: slim red guidebook
description:
A slim, red guidebook, bound in stiffened canvas with printed lettering above a picture of the headless horse rider on the front cover.


item_name: bottle of budget embalming fluid
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large purple glass bottle.  The large purple bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of embalming fluid.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large purple bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: cheap ivory amphora
weight: about fifteen pounds
description:
Crafted from second rate clay and slip, and covered with a veneer of cheap crackling ivory glaze, this amphora carries a bawdy and off-centre painting of an extraordinarily large woman holding a plate of olive.  The inscription beneath the painting reads "From Ephebe - We send Olive our best!"  A work of commercialism and clearly second-rate goods, its handles are poorly sanded and slightly mismatched. Its round stopper is made of pressed cork and is attached to the neck by a cheap, olive oil stained string.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The cheap ivory amphora is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 555 pounds, about two hundred and eighty items, or about 1 gallon.


item_name: Pet Chicken
appraise_text: You appraise the brown chicken and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a well reared chicken, its feathers are all fluffy and full of colour.  She is in good shape.  She is standing.  Her feathers are silky and smooth.


item_name: small pine shelf
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a small, plain pine shelf.  It's the sort of thing used to display a couple of iconographs, or perhaps a few ornaments.  There is nothing on the small pine shelf.

appraise_text:
The small pine shelf is about two feet long and about a foot wide.  It is made of pine and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 5 pounds, or about thirty items.


item_name: painting of a scholar and a goose
weight: about four pounds
description:
This is a traditional Agatean scroll painting, oddly titled 'Portrait of Scholar raises Goose'.  The painting itself is nothing more than a stately looking nobleman sitting on a log, looking intently at a large white goose that has a very worried look on its face.

appraise_text:
The painting of a scholar and a goose is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: anthrax trap
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a anthrax trap suitable for rigging inside the lock of a door.  It uses a small envelope that will open in the face of anyone clumsily picking the lock.

appraise_text:
The anthrax trap is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: gilded ebony cane
weight: 2 2/9 lb
description:
This elegant rod of ebony is without embellishment except for a bevelled gold cap at its base and a shiny golden knob at its top.  It's not entirely unlike the famed staves of wizards, but is far less ostentatious and tasteless.  It's just perfect if you want to throw your weight about by hitting people smaller than you, and look stylish at the same time.

appraise_text:
The gilded ebony cane is about three feet long and about three inches wide.  It is made of wood and could be used as a weapon of type mace.


item_name: black marble fireplace
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This fireplace consists of a marble mantlepiece, surround and hearth constructed around a heatproof brick fire pit.  Clearly made by a skilled craftsperson, the black marble has been polished to almost a mirror shine that is set off nicely by its white veins.  It would add a touch of opulent grandeur to any home.  The hearth is blackened with ashes and old embers.  There is nothing on the black marble fireplace.

appraise_text:
The black marble fireplace is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 13 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: large swirling white bottle
description:
A white bottle, a white mist swoops and swirls around inside it.  Looking more closely, it looks like there's something inside it, small and dancing, flying around inside it like anything.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The large swirling white bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, about thirty items, or about 2 pints.


item_name: unfinished polar bear [build-a-bear]
description: This is a toy polar bear, or at least it will be when it's completed.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The unfinished toy polar bear is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of fur and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: green marble fireplace
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This fireplace consists of a marble mantlepiece, surround and hearth constructed around a heatproof brick fire pit.  Clearly made by a skilled craftsperson, the green marble has been polished to almost a mirror shine that is set off nicely by its white veins.  It would add a touch of opulent grandeur to any home.  The hearth is blackened with ashes and old embers.  There is nothing on the green marble fireplace.

appraise_text:
The green marble fireplace is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 13 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: rat burger
description:
A Dwarfish delight, rat burgers are made from ... well, rats.  It's a small burger on a tiny little bun with lots of grilled onions.  For some reason the meat patty is square and has holes in it.


item_name: pair of terracotta pigs
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a an very old pair of unpainted and unlacquered terracotta pigs.  Snouts in the air, they have their mouths open slightly as if in mid-oink.  Although this piece is not in the best of condition, it is still an eclectic addition that would add to almost home.

appraise_text:
The pair of terracotta pigs is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: bottle of Turbot's Really Odd
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large earth coloured glass bottle.  This is a bottle of Turbot's Really Odd (real ale).  Not much more can be said really, drink it and find out.  The large earth coloured bottle is about three-quarters full with one pint of ale.  It is about three-quarters full.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The large earth coloured bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: glass of white wine
weight: about a pound
description:
This is an expensive looking wine glass made to hold your glass of wine (though it would probably also hold someone else's glass of wine just as well).  The glass of white wine is completely full with seven ounces of white wine.  It is completely full.

appraise_text:
The glass of white wine is about six inches long and about three inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, eight items, or about 1 gill.


item_name: double cross spruce screen
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This double-sided screen has been constructed by lashing pairs of long spruce strips together so that three distinct interconnected panels are hinged together when it is standing.  The frame, decorated with criss-crossed pairs of spruce poles, is covered by a thin layer of rice paper that breaks up light and sheds a warm glow on a room when a lamp is placed behind it.

appraise_text:
The double cross spruce screen is about six feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of paper and wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: lacquered umbrella stand
weight: about ten pounds
description:
This is a conical umbrella stand that raises in an eight-sided cylinder.  Often placed by front doors to house the clothing accessories that are most-loathed, this particular stand is especially peculiar and eye-catching.  Lacquered with several shades of beige, green, and brown enamel, its faces boast an elegant crane taking off from a marshy landscape.

appraise_text:
The lacquered umbrella stand is about five feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 55 pounds, or five items.


item_name: simple wild flower bridal bouquet
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a simple wedding bouquet, made from fresh wild flowers positioned in an eye-pleasing way.  It's the sort of thing you'd find at a country wedding, or indeed that of someone who wants to get back to nature.

appraise_text:
The simple wild flower bridal bouquet is about nine inches long and about nine inches wide.  It is made of flowers and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: Bottle of Koshu Sake
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a bottle of premium Koshu sake.  It has a square label stuck to it bearing the laughing panda logo of the Kou Ture Sake Emporium.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The Koshu bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: small thick cobble
description: This is a small thick cobble. Perhaps it could be skipped on the water?
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The small thick cobble is roughly a couple of inches long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is made of rock and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: terracotta statuette
weight: about four pounds
description:
The fabled terracotta warriors of the battle of Hung-hung are brought to you here in miniature form.  Modelled in authentic dark red clay, this amazingly life-like statuette would be a handsome addition to any home.  The doll is about 4 inches high and blotchy pink in colour.  It has an arm missing.

appraise_text:
The terracotta statuette is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: set of plain wooden kitchen cupboards
weight: about thirty pounds
description:
This is a set of small kitchen cupboards made from simple planks of wood that have been nailed together.  Far from elegant, this set of cupboards still is functional and serviceable.  It probably isn't a good fit for those who prefer their furniture to be decorative as well, though.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The set of plain wooden kitchen cupboards is about seven feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: book of large cigarette papers
weight: less than a pound
description:
This book contains cigarette papers that can be torn out of it when there is an urgent need to roll a cigarette.  Of course it's not a proper book, it's more like a bundle of papers sticking together somehow.  Then again, so is a book.  There are twenty papers left in it.

appraise_text:
The book of large cigarette papers is about four inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of paper.


item_name: octopus squishi
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
On a small cake of rice lies a tiny octopus.  Different from the other fish that has to be tied to the cake, the octopus has somehow been tricked into thinking it's holding its little friend's hand on the other side.


item_name: bottle of Counterwise Wine
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a large dark green glass bottle.  This is a rare bottle of Ghlen Livid counterwise wine, imported from the Counterweight Continent.  Drinking this will probably be the cause of the headache you had yesterday.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The large dark green bottle is about a foot long and about six inches wide.  It is made of glass and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 1 pound, about twenty items, or about 1 pint.


item_name: Pishe tapestry
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
Jagged peaks and a narrow path form the focus of the slightly frayed tapestry, its dark colours obscuring much detail and the artist's lack of talent.  A blob on the path can be identified as Rhaine, a former High Priest of Pishe, only by the bright red letters saying 'Rhaine' and an even brighter red arrow pointing at the blob.  Although he is technically still on the path, his raised foot is trying to stand on thin air, and he seems rather resigned in the manner of doomed characters on blobby tapestries.

appraise_text:
The Pishe tapestry is about four inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: sapphire-blue dagger
description:
The short, fairly thick and double edged blade of this dagger looks pretty much like any other, except that this particular one has an odd bluish hue about it.  The hue is augmented by an almost clear blue stone which resides in the small pommel of the dagger and appears to glow with its own light.  While the blade and pommel shine a crystal blue, the handle itself doesn't, in fact the handle is just a plain, everyday dagger handle with a leather criss-crossed grip.


item_name: oaken daybed
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a simple oaken daybed, touched with accents of gold, its perimeter railing carved into eye-pleasing shapes.  Often placed in the studies of Agatean gentlemen, a noble would often spend many hours reclining on his daybed whilst writing poetry or meditating.  This particular daybed is stout and masculine, its strong lines lending way to a mattress which has been set into the frame and does not break the simple lines of its construction.

appraise_text:
The oaken daybed is about two and a half feet long and about two and a half feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: tapestry of a hunting scene
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
In days of yore, when knights were bold and ladies were capitalised, some idle noblewoman from Sto Lat began this tapestry.  It took her servants two decades to finish, but she begrudged no effort provided that she herself was not obliged to make any.  The result is a scene of rather rigid looking men riding blobby horses, chasing a fox that is roughly the size of Lancre.  It is useful for keeping out draughts, however.

appraise_text:
The tapestry of a hunting scene is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: replica ash [build-a-bear]
appraise_text: Some ash is about an inch long and about an inch wide. It is made of wood.
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a replica of a pile of ash.  It has been crafted using wood and some excellent paintwork.  There is a small strap on it.


item_name: basic door lock
weight: about three pounds
description:
This is a clear packaging for a basic door lock.  The basic door lock package is completely full with a basic door lock and a small brass key.  It is closed.

appraise_text:
The basic door lock package is not very long and not very wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and looks like you could hold it.  It can hold about 2 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: scentless mute cabbage
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a very quiet variety of cabbage that is so pungent it will render the pickers' olfactory senses useless for days when picked.  It's a good boiler.


item_name: bead ring
appraise_text: It is made of silver and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 6 g
description:
Three shiny black beads have been strung onto twisting silver wires to make this ring.  It's the type that would look good worn with lots of other similar rings.


item_name: dragon roll
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about a pound
description:
This is a delicious roll consisting of live miniature salmon rolled into rice and covered with avocado.  It gets its name from the way the roll wiggles about because of the salmon trying to squirm away to freedom.


item_name: rough garnet ring
appraise_text: It is made of rose gold and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 17 g
description:
This ring is a broad band of rose gold, set with a roughly cut garnet.  The wine-red depths of the gem glint softly in the light.


item_name: whipped cream milk chocolate praline
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a whipped cream praline.  It is filled with smooth whipped cream that looks ready to melt on the tongue.  A covering of milk chocolate completes the creation.  It looks delicious and is probably quite expensive.


item_name: pink conch
weight: about six pounds
description:
This is a medium-sized pink conch shell.  It's a very nice conch, though.  You definitely haven't seen many better conch shells than this.  It's a premium quality conch.  Can you tell I'm rambling?

appraise_text:
The pink conch is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: oaken hellhound chair
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
Wicked and mysterious patterns have been engraved all along the frame of this fine oaken chair.  The frame itself has been painted pitch black, creating a clear contrast between the carvings and the dark finish.  Two brass statues, depicting a pair of hellhounds, have been placed as the armrests of the chair.  Their faces, frozen in the middle of a bloodcurdling growl, are punctuated with tiny blood-red glass bead eyes that flare as they catch the light.  Despite that, the chair seems safe enough to sit on.  Well...  as long as any fingers are kept a safe distance away from the jaws of the hounds.

appraise_text:
The oaken hellhound chair is about two and a half feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of oak and brass and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: cherry blossom shoji screen
weight: about ten pounds
description:
A stunning cherry blossom tree adorns the silk panelling of this double-sided shoji screen.  Four panels with black wooden trim fold out to make this screen stand tall, its blossoms painted on with the most precise hand, the thickness of the paint still showing on the silk panels.

appraise_text:
The cherry blossom shoji screen is about six feet long and about three feet wide.  It is made of paper and wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: large firecracker
weight: about a pound and a half
description:
This is a large red tube sporting a short fuse that you could probably light to see some entertaining effects.  Holding it for too long after this is done is ill advised, though.

appraise_text:
The large firecracker is about six inches long and about an inch wide.  It is white and is made of some unidentifiable material.


item_name: dagger [build-a-bear]
description: This is a miniature knife.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The dagger is about an inch long and about an inch wide.  It is made of steel and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: ebony guqin
weight: about seven pounds
description:
This traditional Agatean stringed instrument seems aged and lovingly cared for.  The guqin is a four foot long tapering board of dark and finely polished ebony.  Seven strings of high-quality twisted silk are strung from behind the ceremonial cap, extending across the body to the head of the instrument.  There they run through small holes to tuning pegs on the back, ending in long decorative tassels.  In the back are a larger and a smaller sound hole.

appraise_text:
The ebony guqin is about four feet long and about a foot and a half wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: tiger fang
weight: 1 5/9 lb
description:
As long as a woman's thigh, with a poetic curve and a wickedly clipped tip, the sanmei - three plate - construction of this blade gives it a razor-sharp edge and a strong, resilient spine.  Red-gold filigree curls up the jiangen, the bottom third of the darkened steel blade, and the polished wood of the hilt matches the shade closely.  A jade-eyed tiger's head forms the pommel, regarding the world with a keen gaze.

appraise_text:
The tiger fang is about a foot and a half long and about an inch wide.  It is made of steel and could be used as a weapon of type sword.


item_name: unfinished panda [build-a-bear]
description: This is a toy panda, or at least it will be when it's completed.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The unfinished toy panda is about nine inches long and about four inches wide.  It is made of fur and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: [colour] angora cat
appraise_text: You appraise the pure white angora cat and mmmm, very sexy.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
An elegant, fine-boned cat with unusually large eyes and curious upright ears, the angora is considered a national treasure in its native Tsort.  His long, silky coat is a solid velvety pure white, as temptingly soft as the cat is loving and playful.  He is in good shape.  He is standing.


item_name: deep blue sofa
weight: about sixty pounds
description:
This is a mid-sized sofa, suitable for two people to sit on comfortably (or three at a squeeze).  It is covered with deep blue fabric and has well-stuffed cushions that look invitingly soft.  Perfect for snuggling up with a loved-one, or simply spreading out by yourself.

appraise_text:
The deep blue sofa is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: wooden rain barrel
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Sturdy and well-polished, this open-topped barrel has been bound with shiny brass hoops.  There is a matching tap down the bottom of the barrel you could probably get water out of.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The wooden rain barrel is about four feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 42 pounds, about one hundred and twenty items, or about 4 gallons.


item_name: clump of golden chains
appraise_text: It is made of iron and appears to be a piece of jewellery.
weight: 15 5/9 lb
description:
These are some very heavy, sparkly, shiny chains.  On close inspection, though, they appear not to be gold but only a worthless metal painted gold, although you could still wear them if you wanted to look rather more flash, slick, and affluent than you actually are.


item_name: side of goat
appraise_text: Don't play with your food!
weight: about seven pounds
description:
This is the side of quite a large goat.  It has been totally stripped of its outer skin and had its head and feet chopped off.


item_name: twin dragon sword wall piece
weight: about five pounds
description:
This elegant wall piece comprises a long, slender sword with an elaborate hilt crafted in a miniature sun likeness in gold.  Holding the blade upright, point towards the ground, are two large silver dragons, tails wrapped around the blade several times.  Their wings are spread out to form two half-circles surrounding the hilt of the sword and their heads.  While highly stylised, the dragons are crafted with careful detail and much tiny fretwork, making them quite life-like at first glance.  Seeing as that the blade cannot be pried loose from the dragons' claws and tails and that it probably would be about as useful in combat as a dull spoon, this wall piece has no real use but that for which it was designed: taking up space in a really elegant way.

appraise_text:
The twin dragon sword wall piece is about six inches long and about six inches wide.  It is made of some unidentifiable material and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: rose-cushioned gold sofa
weight: about forty pounds
description:
Elegant and elongated, this is a piece of art as much as it is furniture.  Its dark golden wooden frame rises in a gentle curve along the back of the chair to one end, lower towards the other, curling around at either end towards the armrests.  The cushions are set into the frame, and covered with rose-coloured velvet.

appraise_text:
The rose-cushioned gold sofa is about seventeen and a half feet long and about seven and a half feet wide.  It is made of wood and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: red lacquered child's coffin
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This is a small beautifully designed coffin, made of red lacquered oak.  It has a red silk interior, and is the kind of coffin you would bury your dear baby sister or child in.  You could probably heft a corpse into this coffin.  It is open.

appraise_text:
The red lacquered child's coffin is about seven and a half feet long and about three and a half feet wide.  It is red and is made of oak and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 111 pounds, or about forty items.


item_name: bazaar postcard
appraise_text: The postcard is about six inches long and about three inches wide. It is made of paper.
weight: less than a pound
description:
A rainbow coloured postcard this is indeed.  The image features the Bazaar as seen from above, possibly some tower of the city walls.  The stalls produce a colourful sea of spots and patches, between which a dense crowd can be spotted.  The alleyways between the stalls seem not to follow any pattern at all.


item_name: axe [build-a-bear]
description: This is a very small axe, but also very sharp.
weight: less than a pound
appraise_text:
The axe is roughly a couple of inches long and about an inch wide.  It is made of steel and looks like you could hold it.


item_name: stylish cherry mantelpiece
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This cherrywood mantelpiece would grace any drawing room or study.  Although the frame itself is fairly plain, it is aesthetically designed with graceful, restrained curves leading up to the mantel itself.  Unlike most pieces, the back of this one extends about a foot above the mantel itself.  It features two matching shelves, supported by scrolled brackets, while in the centre is an oval mirror.  There is nothing on the stylish cherry mantelpiece.

appraise_text:
The stylish cherry mantelpiece is about two feet long and about six inches wide.  It is made of cherrywood and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 7 pounds, or about twenty items.


item_name: pair of black wellingtons [build-a-bear]
weight: less than a pound
description:
This is a miniature pair of wellington boots.  A full sized version would probably be waterproof, unlike these ones.

appraise_text:
The pair of black wellingtons is about an inch long and roughly a couple of inches wide.  It is black and is made of leather and looks like you could wear it.


item_name: long pine plank
appraise_text: The long pine plank is about six feet long and about nine inches wide. It is made of wood.
weight: about ten pounds
description:
A long plank, cut from pine.  A few small tight knots and resin pockets add visual texture to the plank.


item_name: braided [colour] wicker chair
weight: about twenty pounds
description:
This black-washed wicker chair gives the impression of being halfway through a dance move, with its rear legs extended elegantly behind it, braided arms sliding forward and the ornamental back sweeping back and out like a lady's ball gown, only upside-down of course.  And most ladies wouldn't wear a ballgown made of wicker-work, even such detailed and elaborate work as this.  Still, it's a metaphor.

appraise_text:
The braided black wicker chair is about a foot long and about a foot wide.  It is made of cane and could be placed as furniture.


item_name: iron safe
weight: about a hundred pounds
description:
This is a "Thighbiter special" iron safe.  It bears the logo of Joseph Thighbiter, a renowned safe maker.  It appears to feature one of his patented locks.  It is open.  It has one top drawer, one middle drawer and one bottom drawer.

appraise_text:
The iron safe is about two feet long and about two feet wide.  It is made of iron and could be placed as furniture.  It can hold about 11 pounds, or about thirty items.


